Matt
@badthoughthaver.bsky.social
Nerd, geek, dork, loser.
Please help: My thoughts, they are bad.
Said thoughts: bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaaolkthurmh6
Pfp by @geraldinepiche.bsky.social HIRE THEM NOW
Please help: My thoughts, they are bad.
Said thoughts: bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaaolkthurmh6
Pfp by @geraldinepiche.bsky.social HIRE THEM NOW
Pinned
Matt
@badthoughthaver.bsky.social
· Oct 30
My personality? Imagine if Marvin the Paranoid Android and Eeyore fucked.
Reposted by Matt
Change a letter, make a singer/band less appealing:
Passive Attack
Passive Attack
Change a letter, make a singer/band less appealing:
Cootie & the Blowfish
Cootie & the Blowfish
Change a letter, make a singer less appealing:
Yeastie Boys
Yeastie Boys
November 14, 2025 at 7:44 PM
Change a letter, make a singer/band less appealing:
Passive Attack
Passive Attack
Reposted by Matt
GOOD VIBES ONLY
1pm Chicago Standard Time
Email subscribers get first dibs via secret link
Sign up
👇
bit.ly/cola-email
⚜️🌹🪻☘️
Cola x @geraldinepiche.bsky.social
1pm Chicago Standard Time
Email subscribers get first dibs via secret link
Sign up
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Cola x @geraldinepiche.bsky.social
November 14, 2025 at 3:42 PM
GOOD VIBES ONLY
1pm Chicago Standard Time
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Sign up
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Cola x @geraldinepiche.bsky.social
1pm Chicago Standard Time
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Sign up
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Cola x @geraldinepiche.bsky.social
Daydreaming of you while I lick the filling out of this creme egg
November 14, 2025 at 3:48 PM
Daydreaming of you while I lick the filling out of this creme egg
Reposted by Matt
Everytime a lib comes up with a new pun to describe trump, im allowed to give a child one cigarette
November 14, 2025 at 12:27 PM
Everytime a lib comes up with a new pun to describe trump, im allowed to give a child one cigarette
Reposted by Matt
![[Scene is a kitchen - a middle aged woman called JANET is boiling peas at the stove. A younger more colourfully dressed woman named LIZ approached her.]
JANET:
Ugh...
LIZ:
What's up?
JANET:
I am so bored of cooking peas!
LIZ:
Have you tried...
AI peas?
JANET:
AI peas?
LIZ:
They're peas with AI!
[Liz holds up to us a packet of peas labelled: Pea-i AI - Peas with AI].
LIZ:
Al-powered peas harness the potential of your peas
JANET:
What
LIZ [Now a voiceover as we cut to a whizzy technology diagram of peas all connected by meaningless dotted lines]
Why not take your peas to the next level with Al Peas' new Al tools to power your peas?
[Show a techno diagram of a pea with a label reading 'AI' pointing to a random zone in it]
LIZ:
Each pea has Al in a way we haven't quite worked out yet but it's fine
[Show Janet and Liz now in a Matrix-style world of peas]
LIZ:
With Al peas you can supercharge productivity and make AI work for your peas!
JANET:
What
LIZ:
Shut up
LIZ:
Our game-changing Pea-Al gives you the freedom to unlock the potential of the power of the future of your peas workflow
From opening the bag of peas
to boiling the peas
to eating the peas
To spending millions on adding Al to the peas and then having to work out what that even means.
JANET:
Is it really necessary to-
LIZ [Grabbing Janet by the collar]:
THE PEAS HAVE GOT AI, JANET
[Cut to an advert ending screen, with the bag of peas and the slogan:
AI PEAS: Just 'Peas' for god's sake buy the AI peas.
[Ends]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4m3we4apbjayclzcnhwe3pfp/bafkreiayqa37f7kik7l7s7fbtfp2sir5ckb662ry2lylinyjrfa2rkvvka@jpeg)
What are we losing our shit over today then?
November 14, 2025 at 12:57 PM
What are we losing our shit over today then?
Reposted by Matt
AI is like the rudest guest at a party. It stole your stuff and took a shit on the table that vaguely resembles it and then goes in your kids bedroom to tell them to kill themselves. Also it keep telling you that Reagan was actually Antifa if you think about it
November 13, 2025 at 7:32 PM
AI is like the rudest guest at a party. It stole your stuff and took a shit on the table that vaguely resembles it and then goes in your kids bedroom to tell them to kill themselves. Also it keep telling you that Reagan was actually Antifa if you think about it
Change a letter, make a singer/band less appealing:
Cootie & the Blowfish
Cootie & the Blowfish
Change a letter, make a singer less appealing:
Yeastie Boys
Yeastie Boys
Change a letter, make a singer less appealing:
Kid Sock
Kid Sock
November 14, 2025 at 8:44 AM
Change a letter, make a singer/band less appealing:
Cootie & the Blowfish
Cootie & the Blowfish
If you see this post a bird
November 14, 2025 at 7:00 AM
If you see this post a bird
Ok it's time for this UK gremlin to try and sleep, in the wildly optimistic hope that he doesn't feel like shit in the morning. Lolz
November 13, 2025 at 10:06 PM
Ok it's time for this UK gremlin to try and sleep, in the wildly optimistic hope that he doesn't feel like shit in the morning. Lolz
Reposted by Matt
Storks are terrifying. If one dropped a baby on my doorstep, I would drown that unnatural, demon given thing.
November 13, 2025 at 8:39 PM
Storks are terrifying. If one dropped a baby on my doorstep, I would drown that unnatural, demon given thing.
Reposted by Matt
"A cunt named Lord Durham called us a people with no literature and no history ... in order to stifle any future rebellion."
I talked to @geraldinepiche.bsky.social about being Québécois ahead of our GOOD VIBES ONLY collab, dropping tomorrow.
I talked to @geraldinepiche.bsky.social about being Québécois ahead of our GOOD VIBES ONLY collab, dropping tomorrow.
INTERVIEW WITH GÉRALDINE PICHÉ
GOOD VIBES ONLY drops 11/13. Subscribe to get first dibs. Email Address *
www.thecolacorporation.com
November 13, 2025 at 7:41 PM
"A cunt named Lord Durham called us a people with no literature and no history ... in order to stifle any future rebellion."
I talked to @geraldinepiche.bsky.social about being Québécois ahead of our GOOD VIBES ONLY collab, dropping tomorrow.
I talked to @geraldinepiche.bsky.social about being Québécois ahead of our GOOD VIBES ONLY collab, dropping tomorrow.
Guys, can you just imagine that I've said something very funny here to get the ball rolling? Because my brain: he says no.
November 13, 2025 at 5:31 PM
Guys, can you just imagine that I've said something very funny here to get the ball rolling? Because my brain: he says no.
Reposted by Matt
I'm a helper late and a hamburger short, but i made it in the end
November 13, 2025 at 5:17 PM
I'm a helper late and a hamburger short, but i made it in the end
I love waking up with a migraine that basically blinds me in one eye for hours, knowing full well that the accusations from people at work will start tomorrow. Such a relaxing atmosphere to be in.
November 13, 2025 at 2:10 PM
I love waking up with a migraine that basically blinds me in one eye for hours, knowing full well that the accusations from people at work will start tomorrow. Such a relaxing atmosphere to be in.
Goon a movie
Gogoon
Gogoon
Goon a movie
The Goon, the Bad and the Ugly
The Goon, the Bad and the Ugly
Goon a movie
"Paper Goon"
"Paper Goon"
November 13, 2025 at 8:54 AM
Goon a movie
Gogoon
Gogoon
Reposted by Matt
ER Doc: so what brings you in today?
Me: I thought she said she liked ships in a butthole…
Doc:
Me:
Me: I thought she said she liked ships in a butthole…
Doc:
Me:
November 12, 2025 at 11:42 PM
ER Doc: so what brings you in today?
Me: I thought she said she liked ships in a butthole…
Doc:
Me:
Me: I thought she said she liked ships in a butthole…
Doc:
Me:
Does anybody want to hit me in the face with a hammer? Nobody's worked out how to make the migraines stop in 23 years so I'm open to trying new unorthodox treatment options.
November 12, 2025 at 7:45 PM
Does anybody want to hit me in the face with a hammer? Nobody's worked out how to make the migraines stop in 23 years so I'm open to trying new unorthodox treatment options.
Reposted by Matt
I’ve been reading over the Bills of Mortality from 1665 (as one does) and the number of deaths noted as being caused by “Teeth” is really adding fuel to the ol’ nightmare fire.
November 12, 2025 at 5:58 PM
I’ve been reading over the Bills of Mortality from 1665 (as one does) and the number of deaths noted as being caused by “Teeth” is really adding fuel to the ol’ nightmare fire.
You ever suddenly decide in your 40s to just completely change the way you've done something for decades? Like, I'm gonna start tying my shoelaces with a different knot. This is not a joke.
November 12, 2025 at 3:07 PM
You ever suddenly decide in your 40s to just completely change the way you've done something for decades? Like, I'm gonna start tying my shoelaces with a different knot. This is not a joke.
[Showing a friend my collection of Madame Tussauds style waxworks of Victorian prostitutes]
Them: So…do you actually do anything with these or do they just sit here?
Me: Oh no, these are strictly for whorenamental purposes.
Them: So…do you actually do anything with these or do they just sit here?
Me: Oh no, these are strictly for whorenamental purposes.
November 12, 2025 at 1:13 PM
[Showing a friend my collection of Madame Tussauds style waxworks of Victorian prostitutes]
Them: So…do you actually do anything with these or do they just sit here?
Me: Oh no, these are strictly for whorenamental purposes.
Them: So…do you actually do anything with these or do they just sit here?
Me: Oh no, these are strictly for whorenamental purposes.
Reposted by Matt
The way you shine
Is incredibly beautiful
And my shoulders
Have all the strength needed
To carry this for a bit
Is incredibly beautiful
And my shoulders
Have all the strength needed
To carry this for a bit
November 12, 2025 at 12:41 PM
The way you shine
Is incredibly beautiful
And my shoulders
Have all the strength needed
To carry this for a bit
Is incredibly beautiful
And my shoulders
Have all the strength needed
To carry this for a bit
Reposted by Matt
It can be tough
It can seem impossible
But if you try
If you focus on one reason
I think you will find
The strength you require
It can seem impossible
But if you try
If you focus on one reason
I think you will find
The strength you require
November 12, 2025 at 12:31 PM
It can be tough
It can seem impossible
But if you try
If you focus on one reason
I think you will find
The strength you require
It can seem impossible
But if you try
If you focus on one reason
I think you will find
The strength you require