Vernors Herzog
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vernorsherzog.bsky.social
Vernors Herzog
@vernorsherzog.bsky.social
Lanstronaut | Michigander | Midwestern as heck | co-runner of Lansing Facts | here to make dumb jokes, get smarter about politics, and occasionally post about sports (he/him)
The top hat is a signifier of elite status, underscored by his close connection to big tobacco (corncob pipe), sweatshop labor (button nose), and the fossil fuel industry (two eyes made out of coal). In this essay, I will
December 1, 2025 at 2:53 PM
til wealth trickles down my balls
i’m really digging the new democratic catchphrase “from the window, to the wall”
December 1, 2025 at 2:05 AM
it’s giving Republican senator talking about the border crisis
This interview setting has vibes entirely of its own 😂
www.espn.com/video/clip/_...
November 30, 2025 at 11:09 PM
Reposted by Vernors Herzog
I seriously have no idea why you’d hire Pat Fitzgerald. He wasn’t a playcaller or strategic mind, his whole schtick was selling Northwestern Culture because he played there, and then it turns out that culture featured a brutal atmosphere of sexual hazing
November 30, 2025 at 9:26 PM
I’m not a big money donor, so maybe it won’t matter, but I sent an email to their football comms person to let them know I won’t watch a minute of MSU football if they hire Fitzgerald

[email protected]
sure, our scandal-ridden program is trying to hire a guy who was fired for overseeing a culture of sexual assault, but it’s important to remember he sucks at coaching
Michigan State plans to hire Pat Fitzgerald as next football coach with @grahamcouch.bsky.social www.freep.com/story/sports...
November 30, 2025 at 9:52 PM
sure, our scandal-ridden program is trying to hire a guy who was fired for overseeing a culture of sexual assault, but it’s important to remember he sucks at coaching
November 30, 2025 at 9:45 PM
this is going to be the dumbest coaching search and no one is going to be happy with the result
SOURCES: Michigan State is firing head coach Jonathan Smith, @theathletic.com has learned.

He went 9-15 in two seasons, including 1-8 in the Big Ten this year. (ESPN first reported).

MSU players meeting called for 2:45. Smith has a $33 million buyout (with offset).
November 30, 2025 at 9:34 PM
“strong floor, no ceiling” because we’re all going to be sleeping on the streets by the time we get him out of office
No value, no villain, no vision. Sounds like the tagline for the earnings call of a collapsing appliance retailer
November 30, 2025 at 6:46 PM
this Iron Bowl is the drunkest football game I’ve ever seen
November 30, 2025 at 4:28 AM
after extensive research, I’ve determined these are the major genres of Christmas music
November 29, 2025 at 10:45 PM
while I hate rooting for Michigan football, the funniest outcome is clearly Ryan Day continuing to drive OSU fans crazy by being incredibly successful except for shitting the bed every year in their most important rivalry
November 29, 2025 at 3:29 PM
YOINK
November 29, 2025 at 1:59 AM
of all the cynical holiday music cash grabs, this remake of Jenny really takes the fruitcake
Santa I Got Your Number
YouTube video by Tommy Tutone - Topic
youtu.be
November 28, 2025 at 10:22 PM
Reposted by Vernors Herzog
“You’ll be visited by three spirits.”

The three spirits:
November 28, 2025 at 4:07 AM
post something random or you'll have an awful December
November 27, 2025 at 9:10 PM
to a freak like me, the card game is Eights
To a freak like me, the side at Little Caesars is just “bread”
to a freak like me, the classic sega arcade game is just "taxi"
November 27, 2025 at 5:17 AM
Reposted by Vernors Herzog
What I've been thinking about the last hour or so
#Beatles
November 27, 2025 at 4:37 AM
November 26, 2025 at 5:33 PM
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Ok pals - we’re starting the annual “what do I get for my wife/mom/sister/partner/lady in life?” thread
November 20, 2025 at 5:18 PM
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girl r u what mariah carey doesn’t want for christmas?

bc u are A LOT.
November 23, 2025 at 4:17 AM
it’s an illusion, Michael
November 23, 2025 at 1:29 AM
Reposted by Vernors Herzog
help
November 22, 2025 at 12:07 AM
me: let’s work on your homework together!

kid: it’s multiplying fractions

me: actually it’s important for you to do things independently
November 21, 2025 at 12:56 AM
*youth pastor voice*
all you kids are laughing about 6-7 [does hand gesture]. but you know what I’m thinking about? Galatians 6:7, which says, "do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap"
Headlines That Look Like Shitposts
November 20, 2025 at 6:52 PM
Reposted by Vernors Herzog
Still on FB to keep up with family but, like the platform itself, the ads keep getting more and more deranged:
November 19, 2025 at 1:37 PM