Felonious Monk 📚
@thefeloniousmonk.com
Forever forlorn poet. Bipolar. Dad joking Daddy Dom. Heart of a poet, appetite of a beast. Vulgar and respectful per @halfbakedrhymes.com. Says fuck a lot. 50/50 earnestposting / shitposting. DMs open. 18+ MDNI.
Connect: linktr.ee/thefeloniousmonk
Connect: linktr.ee/thefeloniousmonk
Pinned
Felonious Monk 📚
@thefeloniousmonk.com
· Oct 11
Hi! I'm Monk. Whatever you followed me for, you should know I post a lot of things that aren't that. I'm delightfully obscene, and always happy to answer questions about kink. I also write poetry, and am working on my first novel. I love art and food and nudity, often at the same time. 1/2
Reposted by Felonious Monk 📚
got a consult from the resident breastspert @thefeloniousmonk.com about some breasts
November 29, 2025 at 12:23 AM
got a consult from the resident breastspert @thefeloniousmonk.com about some breasts
A day early and a dollar over (I compensate for executive dysfunction by overpreparing)
November 28, 2025 at 9:27 PM
A day early and a dollar over (I compensate for executive dysfunction by overpreparing)
I...
Cause I love having sex unprotected
And I love when my dicks in you naked
Going raw in you you you you
Going raw in you you you
You're infected
Need antiseptic
Cause you burned it ohhhh you burned it
And I love when my dicks in you naked
Going raw in you you you you
Going raw in you you you
You're infected
Need antiseptic
Cause you burned it ohhhh you burned it
a person wearing a wig is making a gesture with their hands in front of a wall that says alter on it
ALT: a person wearing a wig is making a gesture with their hands in front of a wall that says alter on it
media.tenor.com
November 28, 2025 at 9:20 PM
I...
If you have a Thomas Shelby PFP, I assume you're a wannabe alpha dipshit.
Sorry, them's the rules.
Sorry, them's the rules.
November 28, 2025 at 9:09 PM
If you have a Thomas Shelby PFP, I assume you're a wannabe alpha dipshit.
Sorry, them's the rules.
Sorry, them's the rules.
Reposted by Felonious Monk 📚
You can post suicide prevention numbers all you want. But if you really want to prevent suicide and depression why not stop being such assholes to each other online and irl.
November 26, 2025 at 1:01 AM
You can post suicide prevention numbers all you want. But if you really want to prevent suicide and depression why not stop being such assholes to each other online and irl.
I'm Felonious Monk, and I approve this post.
I used to write amazing monkey puns but I've gibbon up
November 28, 2025 at 6:11 PM
I'm Felonious Monk, and I approve this post.
Reposted by Felonious Monk 📚
if you are new to the community:
FREE FRIDAY | artbymox
time to do some good.
artbymox.shop
November 11, 2025 at 8:36 PM
if you are new to the community:
Many such cases
i made the mistake of leaving the house today. do not recommend.
November 28, 2025 at 6:07 PM
Many such cases
Wisdom.
Exactly. One must pace themselves with volume of dicks, or metaphors, as to have more in the long run
November 28, 2025 at 6:04 PM
Wisdom.
Baby, baby, I'm gonna do some postin...
I love obscure metaphors as much as Amy Grant loves country music dick.
November 28, 2025 at 5:58 PM
Baby, baby, I'm gonna do some postin...
Buy art at annijyn.com to help @annijyn.com achieve this lifetime dream. Your purchases will go directly towards funding the acquisition of an extra cozy santa hat.
November 28, 2025 at 5:49 PM
Buy art at annijyn.com to help @annijyn.com achieve this lifetime dream. Your purchases will go directly towards funding the acquisition of an extra cozy santa hat.
Yes, yes, I know, it's actually a simile. Blow me.
I love obscure metaphors as much as Amy Grant loves country music dick.
November 28, 2025 at 5:35 PM
Yes, yes, I know, it's actually a simile. Blow me.
Reposted by Felonious Monk 📚
"Your love of the halfling's leaf has clearly slowed your mind!"
*lick his own ass*
*lick his own ass*
November 28, 2025 at 5:26 PM
"Your love of the halfling's leaf has clearly slowed your mind!"
*lick his own ass*
*lick his own ass*
Leave little Saruman alone.
Some of those dogs at the dog show are just obscene abominations unto the lord.
November 28, 2025 at 5:24 PM
Leave little Saruman alone.
Somebody needs her ass ate.
*eating* pussy
*eating* ass
Okay why are we calling it that? You are *licking* not *eating.* You are not taking a bite, masticating, swallowing, and digesting, so knock it off.
(Everyone save your Dahmer jokes, you know what I’m saying!)
*eating* ass
Okay why are we calling it that? You are *licking* not *eating.* You are not taking a bite, masticating, swallowing, and digesting, so knock it off.
(Everyone save your Dahmer jokes, you know what I’m saying!)
November 28, 2025 at 5:17 PM
Somebody needs her ass ate.
I love obscure metaphors as much as Amy Grant loves country music dick.
November 28, 2025 at 5:15 PM
I love obscure metaphors as much as Amy Grant loves country music dick.
I'm fucking crying.
Post your favorite "Lord of the Rings" character... wrong answers only.
November 28, 2025 at 5:03 PM
I'm fucking crying.
If I have to get ratioed, that's the way to go.
Adding ratioing @thefeloniousmonk.com with titties to my resume
November 28, 2025 at 4:46 PM
If I have to get ratioed, that's the way to go.
My dog snoring next to me at my desk >>>>>
November 28, 2025 at 4:43 PM
My dog snoring next to me at my desk >>>>>
You're selling me on this.
Isn’t that just a tossed salad with edible warming lube?
November 27, 2025 at 11:28 PM
You're selling me on this.
I take meds 3x per day. I can usually tell how chaotic a week is based on the doses I miss in my daily dose container.
3 in the last 7 days. That's a lot for me. I'm so fucking glad today is a chill day.
3 in the last 7 days. That's a lot for me. I'm so fucking glad today is a chill day.
November 27, 2025 at 3:37 PM
I take meds 3x per day. I can usually tell how chaotic a week is based on the doses I miss in my daily dose container.
3 in the last 7 days. That's a lot for me. I'm so fucking glad today is a chill day.
3 in the last 7 days. That's a lot for me. I'm so fucking glad today is a chill day.
👀
y’all ever try to deep fry a salad. don’t
November 27, 2025 at 3:36 PM
👀
What an easy way to get some gorgeous art for your home while supporting the hungry.
🚨PRINT RAFFLE!!
excited to announce I'll be giving away four limited edition test prints of my collages.
All you need to do to enter is donate $10+ to any food bank and upload your receipt using the form link below!
Open until Nov 30th! (US entries only, sorry)
form.jotform.com/253136257434...
excited to announce I'll be giving away four limited edition test prints of my collages.
All you need to do to enter is donate $10+ to any food bank and upload your receipt using the form link below!
Open until Nov 30th! (US entries only, sorry)
form.jotform.com/253136257434...
November 25, 2025 at 5:17 PM
What an easy way to get some gorgeous art for your home while supporting the hungry.
Reposted by Felonious Monk 📚
What a girl wants
What a girl needs
Is to be left alone
with a pile of cheese
What a girl needs
Is to be left alone
with a pile of cheese
November 25, 2025 at 4:00 PM
What a girl wants
What a girl needs
Is to be left alone
with a pile of cheese
What a girl needs
Is to be left alone
with a pile of cheese
Reposted by Felonious Monk 📚
Your finest work to date and it's not even close
November 25, 2025 at 4:00 PM
Your finest work to date and it's not even close