Lyndon Baines Johnson
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lyndonbajohnson.bsky.social
Lyndon Baines Johnson
@lyndonbajohnson.bsky.social
This account is a parody. Label applied on the advice of Abe Fortas, Esq. Due to ongoing disputes with management, all messages here are reviewed by Fortas and Associates LLP before posting.

FAQ: https://tinyurl.com/bdfw9kwf
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Actually, as the first talk of college football begins, we've done you the service of updating our guide to Texas college football, who you are allowed to root for, and whom you're obligated to root against. -OS
It's also just really fuckin' funny that Aggie is going to die on the hill that "gender is not performative and only conforms to a dichotomous biological fact" when.... -OS
November 15, 2025 at 12:06 AM
Perry's career is kind of the parable of Texas A&M. You took this drunk idiot who most people actually liked, because he was sort of goofy and hilarious and you put him in glasses, insisted he's smart, and that he should be taken seriously, and it all fell apart.
Rick Perry being the most prominent alum kinda says it all actually
November 14, 2025 at 11:56 PM
Comparing Aggie to the Kennedys is unfair to the Kennedy's because some of the Kennedys were actually liked and actually won things, two concepts that are totally foreign to Aggieland. -OS
So they’re the Kennedys of college football
November 14, 2025 at 11:47 PM
Texas A&M is a nepobaby who was given every opportunity and advantage in life and used that to blow his own nuts off. -OS
November 14, 2025 at 11:41 PM
An Aggie Yell Leader.
I wonder what the NJPC mascot would be, sir 🤔
November 14, 2025 at 11:38 PM
You thought the last 100 years of Aggie Football sucked? Just imagine how bad they'll be when you turn it into Nazi Jesus Polytechnic College. -OS
November 14, 2025 at 11:32 PM
Eternally, the difference between Texas and Aggie is that Texas must be steered by an insane governor into doing the dumbest thing imaginable and Aggie just wants to go ahead and do the dumbest thing imaginable. -OS
Message to all faculty: your expertise is no longer trusted or valued at this so-called “university.”
November 14, 2025 at 11:14 PM
The way to fight this is with malicious compliance. If you teach at Aggie you should be sending every syllabus, every assigned reading, and even all your lecture slides and assignments to the president's office to make sure they're "ok." Bury the fuckers in an avalanche. -OS
It is no coincidence that Texas A&M, the education arm of the TX oil & gas cartel, is on the forefront of destroying liberal education.
Message to all faculty: your expertise is no longer trusted or valued at this so-called “university.”
November 14, 2025 at 11:09 PM
The obvious pattern of the emails -- and these are just emails from the estate -- is that Epstein was running a blackmail ring that had Trump in its net, and all these loathsome sonsofbitches thought Trump was the most loathsome sonofabitch of them all.
November 14, 2025 at 6:36 PM
We're at least fairly certain ICE can't detain our beloved neighbor Nacho. The man is like the love child of Kosmo Kramer and Pancho Villa. Pure, ungovernable chaos. If they tried he'd come home in a stolen CBP truck. -OS
November 13, 2025 at 8:35 PM
We're in that slim band of Houston weather where it's absolutely wonderful to be drunk outside. -OS
November 11, 2025 at 8:43 PM
The crazy thing to me, is Manchin strikes me as the kind of guy who wouldn't be that hard to sell on the whole idea behind the shutdown. He had a rhyme and reason. He wasn't pointless. He wasn't Sinema.
As a WV Dem, who generally liked Manchin, last night would have been his "Get In There and Make it About Me" meme.
November 10, 2025 at 9:57 PM
I'd shove Schumer out the first available airlock and replace him with someone who knows how to wield a knife (stapler) like Klobuchar.
I’m one of many who wants Schumer out as Leader. I’d take pretty much anyone else except for the defectors. Just curious if you see a front runner and/or have a favorite of your own.
November 10, 2025 at 5:20 PM
I'd have put Fetterman's head through window. Maybe another clot would shock some sense back into him.
Can you imagine LBJ letting this happen? Smh they don’t make them like they used to
November 10, 2025 at 5:13 PM
Picking up the soap in the prison shower.
Interested in @lyndonbajohnson.bsky.social take on tonight’s developments
November 10, 2025 at 5:11 PM
Zipping up your own cock.
November 10, 2025 at 5:11 PM
Schumer could not have done more to lend credence to the progressive criticism of the Democratic establishment. There was no political pressure from the constituency to end the shutdown. You ended it for the donors. Stupifying politics. Kaine wants to break? Crush him.
November 10, 2025 at 5:10 PM
Elko is probably the smartest hire Aggie football has made in 40 years, but today will be the first test of the year for whether they're the same old Aggie or not.
November 8, 2025 at 7:06 PM
Our little dose of daily hopium is that the national environment in 2026 is more than likely going to be 10+ points more blue leaning than it was in 2022 and TX Republicans drew a gerrymander for dear leader that would've been utterly annihilated in 2018. -OS
November 8, 2025 at 6:34 AM
That's equivalent of saying that every person who's being held in the looney bin against their will swears they're copacetic. -OS
Every Republican I encounter on social media blames the Democrats
November 8, 2025 at 6:19 AM
And there's no off-ramp because the Senate is probably ready to cave to Democrats on Obamacare, but Johnson isn't bringing the House back into session when all the Democrats and probably enough Republicans want the Epstein files.
Airline travel will basically be untenable by Thanksgiving, and the whole of air traffic will have to basically be cut down to international and hub-to-hub by Christmas. And there's no off-ramp to this shutdown in sight. It's going to be a political bloodbath. -OS
November 8, 2025 at 6:10 AM
Airline travel will basically be untenable by Thanksgiving, and the whole of air traffic will have to basically be cut down to international and hub-to-hub by Christmas. And there's no off-ramp to this shutdown in sight. It's going to be a political bloodbath. -OS
November 8, 2025 at 6:00 AM
The crazy thing is Texas really brought a lot of risk into their gambit for 5 seats (could totally blow up in their face for 3 of the 5 new districts) and CA could safely go full-Illinois, touch every district to the Pacific and draw a 52-0 map that's at least D+10 everywhere. -OS
Meanwhile in California all the newly redrawn seats will have Dem noms making blood oaths for the downfall of the GOP.
November 8, 2025 at 5:32 AM
And we think you'll really see this insane-o effect in the next round of Republican US House primaries with the new map. Already, North of Houston, Hunt and Luttrell aren't running again and will be wholly unsurprising if Toth beats Crenshaw in a crazy-off. -OS
Kind of a general dynamic in both the older Houston and Dallas suburbs is that you have a map that looks more purple-ish because the new generation of homeowners are way less white, but the Republican Primary is nuts because the whites who are still there are bonkers. -OS
November 8, 2025 at 5:22 AM
Right. The Philadelphia collar counties have just legitimately been pulled toward the Dwmocratic Party by education sorting. Collin and Denton Counties in Texas are just way more diverse than they once were but the whites are even more crazy than they were in 2010. -OS
A big difference between Midwestern suburbs and Southern suburbs is that whites in the former genuinely did become more democratic, while whites in the latter stayed more or less the same.
November 8, 2025 at 4:55 AM