King Bandit, The First of His Name
@kingbandit.bsky.social
Infosec/devops manager/engineer 🔐, neoliberal sellout 🌐, dystopia enthusiast 💣 - ♟️, 🏀, various rants.
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
the only thing Democrats should be saying on Greenland is "this is evil and wrong and if we do it we will be punished"
like do i trust bernie would oppose the annexation? yes. do i think this is good messaging that is what EU allies need? no
January 19, 2026 at 4:11 AM
the only thing Democrats should be saying on Greenland is "this is evil and wrong and if we do it we will be punished"
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
This, right here 🎯💯. I’ve been trying to communicate this to people, as a native 🇨🇦, for a year now. Again, the fact that this wasn’t immediately seen as a presidency-ending, beyond-the-pale thing for all 535 Congresspeople, the media, & the public is deeply ugly & shameful for us as a country.
Good rule of thumb for friends is to imagine if China decided to start loudly discussing taking Hawaii, and how quickly you'd see red, and how unfunny you'd find it, and how belligerent your reaction to it would be. That is how Europeans and Canadians feel about this rhetoric from the US.
January 19, 2026 at 4:21 AM
This, right here 🎯💯. I’ve been trying to communicate this to people, as a native 🇨🇦, for a year now. Again, the fact that this wasn’t immediately seen as a presidency-ending, beyond-the-pale thing for all 535 Congresspeople, the media, & the public is deeply ugly & shameful for us as a country.
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
Nuanced take: I think it's really important to give *normal citizens* who supported Trump and off-ramp and *professional writers, pundits and politicians* who supported Trump should have to wear it like a scarlet letter for the rest of their lives
This is aggravating, because on the one hand I think it's really important to give fascists an off-ramp and positive reinforcement when they use it...
...on the other hand, FUCK that guy, in particular.
...on the other hand, FUCK that guy, in particular.
January 18, 2026 at 8:30 PM
Nuanced take: I think it's really important to give *normal citizens* who supported Trump and off-ramp and *professional writers, pundits and politicians* who supported Trump should have to wear it like a scarlet letter for the rest of their lives
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
trump will lose but sadly one way he has already won is just how acclimated i have gotten over the last ten years to things i previously would have thought insane, and how low my expectations are for people to be normal
January 19, 2026 at 3:12 AM
trump will lose but sadly one way he has already won is just how acclimated i have gotten over the last ten years to things i previously would have thought insane, and how low my expectations are for people to be normal
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
Verbal assault or, as it's legally known, "not assault"
"We've seen over a thousand percent increase in assaults on ICE officers, 8,000 verbal assaults on them...."
January 18, 2026 at 9:57 PM
Verbal assault or, as it's legally known, "not assault"
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
Even though the Bears lost this game, I hope we can find a way to not memoryhole that Caleb Williams play because it legitimately might be the best play by a QB I've ever seen.
January 19, 2026 at 3:05 AM
Even though the Bears lost this game, I hope we can find a way to not memoryhole that Caleb Williams play because it legitimately might be the best play by a QB I've ever seen.
Well that was a letdown. I guess it's Team Anybody But New England time.
January 19, 2026 at 3:03 AM
Well that was a letdown. I guess it's Team Anybody But New England time.
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
January 19, 2026 at 2:36 AM
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
it’s 3:55am for the pope and i just know he yelled “FUCK!” when caleb heaved that int
January 19, 2026 at 2:56 AM
it’s 3:55am for the pope and i just know he yelled “FUCK!” when caleb heaved that int
Caleb Williams giveth and Caleb Williams taketh away
January 19, 2026 at 2:54 AM
Caleb Williams giveth and Caleb Williams taketh away
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
Every Caleb Williams play
January 19, 2026 at 2:46 AM
Every Caleb Williams play
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
The whole thing Ben Johnson was supposed to do was stop Caleb Williams from frantically running backwards to try and avoid NFL pass rushes by playing heroball
And then to save their season, Caleb Williams needed to frantically run backwards to avoid a pass rush and make a heroball throw
🤷🏻
And then to save their season, Caleb Williams needed to frantically run backwards to avoid a pass rush and make a heroball throw
🤷🏻
January 19, 2026 at 2:44 AM
The whole thing Ben Johnson was supposed to do was stop Caleb Williams from frantically running backwards to try and avoid NFL pass rushes by playing heroball
And then to save their season, Caleb Williams needed to frantically run backwards to avoid a pass rush and make a heroball throw
🤷🏻
And then to save their season, Caleb Williams needed to frantically run backwards to avoid a pass rush and make a heroball throw
🤷🏻
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
All I can say is that when the devil comes for whichever Bears fan sold their soul to make that deal, they’re definitely gonna say, “worth it.”
January 19, 2026 at 2:42 AM
All I can say is that when the devil comes for whichever Bears fan sold their soul to make that deal, they’re definitely gonna say, “worth it.”
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
close enough
i feel compelled to watch the entire Bears game even though I know it will end with Caleb Williams throwing a 37-yard touchdown under intense pressure on 4th-and-11
January 19, 2026 at 2:37 AM
close enough
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
Caleb makes the new Best Throw In Bears History every week
January 19, 2026 at 2:37 AM
Caleb makes the new Best Throw In Bears History every week
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
That's the equivalent of an NBA player hitting one from the center court logo as time expired
January 19, 2026 at 2:38 AM
That's the equivalent of an NBA player hitting one from the center court logo as time expired
Oh for the love of god
January 19, 2026 at 2:36 AM
Oh for the love of god
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
"Lord, if you're listenin..."
January 19, 2026 at 2:29 AM
"Lord, if you're listenin..."
So just a totally typical Bears game then.
January 19, 2026 at 2:32 AM
So just a totally typical Bears game then.
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
Reminds me of one of my favorite memes:
January 19, 2026 at 12:17 AM
Reminds me of one of my favorite memes:
Reposted by King Bandit, The First of His Name
I'm not sure I've ever seen a QB who seems to alternate so rapidly between incredible jaw-dropping plays and passes where you go "wtf was that???" more than Caleb Williams does.
January 19, 2026 at 2:16 AM
I'm not sure I've ever seen a QB who seems to alternate so rapidly between incredible jaw-dropping plays and passes where you go "wtf was that???" more than Caleb Williams does.