innerpenguin.bsky.social
@innerpenguin.bsky.social
Well this will surely end in tears and regrets…..
February 3, 2025 at 12:49 PM
Most important reminder.
December 25, 2024 at 10:58 AM
Reposted
me: you boy what day is it today?

boy: nonces shout out of the window day.

me: oof you’ve absolutely done me there.
December 25, 2024 at 7:57 AM
Top gifting
December 25, 2024 at 8:45 AM
Sorry what?
December 24, 2024 at 9:57 PM
This is a regular Christmas Eve activity isn’t it?!?
December 24, 2024 at 8:49 PM
Reposted
Annual morbidity in the 20th century, before and after vaccines:

Measles:
Before: 530,000, After: 47

Mumps:
Before: 160,000, After: 429

Rubella:
Before: 50,000, After: 3

Diphtheria:
Before: 20,000, After: 2

Smallpox:
Before: 30,000, After: 0

Polio:
Before: 16,000, After: 0
November 17, 2024 at 4:25 PM
Just had the traditional festive Chinese carb loading.
December 23, 2024 at 8:09 PM
Managed to limp through the last strength session. Hot on the heels of conditioning on Friday and Sunday. Broken.
December 23, 2024 at 8:04 PM
I’m sure a Sherry with my shot of night nurse will be fine.
December 23, 2024 at 8:03 PM
Chas and Dave really dividing my timeline tonight bizarrely.
December 21, 2024 at 6:22 AM
Reposted
Does anyone know if there's a Gavin & Stacey special on this Christmas?
December 20, 2024 at 8:02 PM
Reposted
Interviewer: Can you explain this gap in your resume?
Me: I moved one bullet point in MS Word.
December 20, 2024 at 8:22 PM
Reposted
I don't know who needs to hear this, but you don't need to justify your reading preferences and choices to anyone. Audiobooks count as reading. Also, you don't have to finish books you don't enjoy. Don't read to impress, read for yourself. Life's too short, love yourself, ok?

Signed, a librarian.
December 7, 2024 at 3:51 PM
Reposted
my love language is avoidance
December 8, 2024 at 8:28 AM
Reposted
5 reasons why The Shining is a Christmas movie

1. Snow
2. Red rum
3. Hyperactive kids
4. Big snuggly jumpers
5. Huge family row ending with someone putting an axe through the door.
December 3, 2024 at 7:43 AM
Reposted
There is nothing better than being up early before it’s light, sitting in a warm kitchen, drinking tea and making up stories. Thanks to @panmacmillan.bsky.social and the lovely readers who make this possible.
December 3, 2024 at 7:48 AM
Offt very damp cobbler walk today
December 1, 2024 at 8:19 PM
Reposted
The tragedy is that Gregg Wallace will be at home brooding because "I'm just mucking about. I don't mean nothing by it. Everyone knows that. People have got so sensitive". When women have been squirming and flinching around him his entire adult life.
November 29, 2024 at 8:13 AM
Reposted
Did…did a minotaur write this
November 25, 2024 at 11:09 AM
Going back to bed.
November 24, 2024 at 8:59 AM
Lost a tree to Bert but it’s taken down the phone lines and now we have no wifi. No wifi = no TV and potential working from the office. Urgh.
November 24, 2024 at 8:35 AM
Offt delicate this morning. I remember now why I rarely do this anymore
November 24, 2024 at 8:30 AM
Reposted
Imagine going out on a successful date… they take you home… the next thing you know you’re in danger of being Spread Eagled on Dead Nan’s face.

What are you saying to get yourself out of there?
What’s the matter hon? You haven’t been using your Dead Nan duvet and pillow set.
November 24, 2024 at 7:24 AM
Reposted
That’ll explain why it’s still under my pillow.
December 11, 2023 at 8:26 AM