Balderdash
@balderdash.bsky.social
I placed my onions
on the floor,
under the window
by the door.
The layers of nuance
caught their eyes,
the day I won
The Turner Prize
on the floor,
under the window
by the door.
The layers of nuance
caught their eyes,
the day I won
The Turner Prize
Pinned
Balderdash
@balderdash.bsky.social
· Oct 11
12 year old daughter told me she has her first boyfriend “accidentally as we don’t really know each other.” I said ‘ha, just like me and your mother.’ No-one laughed. Atmosphere remains frosty at best.
#diary
#diary
True - and the song straight after too.
December 1, 2025 at 3:43 PM
True - and the song straight after too.
Four actors you love: Miranda Richardson, Brendan Gleeson, Lesley Manville & Tom Hollander.
November 30, 2025 at 10:47 PM
Four actors you love: Miranda Richardson, Brendan Gleeson, Lesley Manville & Tom Hollander.
‘Are you members of You’re Party?’
‘Fuck off. You’re party! Illiterate Wankers. We’re Your Party. You’re party … pffft.
‘Fuck off. You’re party! Illiterate Wankers. We’re Your Party. You’re party … pffft.
November 30, 2025 at 8:44 PM
‘Are you members of You’re Party?’
‘Fuck off. You’re party! Illiterate Wankers. We’re Your Party. You’re party … pffft.
‘Fuck off. You’re party! Illiterate Wankers. We’re Your Party. You’re party … pffft.
Apologies for this: I’m 9th in the fantasy football scout league and 616 overall. Sure you’re all delighted for me.
November 30, 2025 at 11:57 AM
Apologies for this: I’m 9th in the fantasy football scout league and 616 overall. Sure you’re all delighted for me.
England win 8-0. China’s defence fragile and porous.
a man in a suit and tie is sitting in a chair with his mouth open and his hand on his face .
ALT: a man in a suit and tie is sitting in a chair with his mouth open and his hand on his face .
media.tenor.com
November 29, 2025 at 7:27 PM
England win 8-0. China’s defence fragile and porous.
Reposted by Balderdash
Perfect Tom Stoppard story from DTel obituary:
His response to a letter from Harold Pinter canvassing support for a proposal to have the Comedy Theatre in London rechristened the Pinter Theatre, “Have you thought, instead, of changing your name to Harold Comedy?”
His response to a letter from Harold Pinter canvassing support for a proposal to have the Comedy Theatre in London rechristened the Pinter Theatre, “Have you thought, instead, of changing your name to Harold Comedy?”
November 29, 2025 at 7:09 PM
Perfect Tom Stoppard story from DTel obituary:
His response to a letter from Harold Pinter canvassing support for a proposal to have the Comedy Theatre in London rechristened the Pinter Theatre, “Have you thought, instead, of changing your name to Harold Comedy?”
His response to a letter from Harold Pinter canvassing support for a proposal to have the Comedy Theatre in London rechristened the Pinter Theatre, “Have you thought, instead, of changing your name to Harold Comedy?”
Never had an advent calendar but I’ve been given a cheese one. Will keep you updated.
November 29, 2025 at 6:27 PM
Never had an advent calendar but I’ve been given a cheese one. Will keep you updated.
England scored a penalty on 37:20 after an incident which happened on the 32:50 mark. Four and a half minutes for VAR to make a decision. And then the ref gives two minutes injury time. Farcical, tedious, inept and another example of football fans getting ripped off.
November 29, 2025 at 6:19 PM
England scored a penalty on 37:20 after an incident which happened on the 32:50 mark. Four and a half minutes for VAR to make a decision. And then the ref gives two minutes injury time. Farcical, tedious, inept and another example of football fans getting ripped off.
Was just about to post exactly the same thing: 11 arrested- three on manslaughter charges, 8 on related charges. In comparison, a report recently said nobody here will be charged till 2026.
* see enclosed screenshot.
* see enclosed screenshot.
November 29, 2025 at 3:33 PM
Was just about to post exactly the same thing: 11 arrested- three on manslaughter charges, 8 on related charges. In comparison, a report recently said nobody here will be charged till 2026.
* see enclosed screenshot.
* see enclosed screenshot.
Reposted by Balderdash
So, happy 50th anniversary to Melody Maker’s review of Bohemian Rhapsody: “Queen, with a suitably baroque vocal orchestration, contrive to approximate the demented fury of the Balham Amateur Operatic Society performing The Pirates of Penzance”
November 29, 2025 at 10:26 AM
So, happy 50th anniversary to Melody Maker’s review of Bohemian Rhapsody: “Queen, with a suitably baroque vocal orchestration, contrive to approximate the demented fury of the Balham Amateur Operatic Society performing The Pirates of Penzance”
Listening to Agatha Christie’s ABC Murders and The Mysterious Affair at Styles with Peter Dinklage as Poirot and he is absolutely superb. Free on Audible.
November 27, 2025 at 10:33 PM
Listening to Agatha Christie’s ABC Murders and The Mysterious Affair at Styles with Peter Dinklage as Poirot and he is absolutely superb. Free on Audible.
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen.
Pixies
Rolling Stones
Sade
John Otway
Cud
Pixies
Rolling Stones
Sade
John Otway
Cud
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen.
Yes
King Crimson
Secret Chiefs 3
Adam Ant
Mike Oldfield
Yes
King Crimson
Secret Chiefs 3
Adam Ant
Mike Oldfield
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you've seen.
Depeche Mode
The Cure
Gary Numan
Sparks
INXS
Depeche Mode
The Cure
Gary Numan
Sparks
INXS
November 27, 2025 at 4:13 PM
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen.
Pixies
Rolling Stones
Sade
John Otway
Cud
Pixies
Rolling Stones
Sade
John Otway
Cud
Latest rustic loaf
November 27, 2025 at 4:08 PM
Latest rustic loaf
On Thanksgiving Day, it’s important that people from all over the world unite and give thanks that we’re not American.
November 27, 2025 at 12:01 PM
On Thanksgiving Day, it’s important that people from all over the world unite and give thanks that we’re not American.
Reposted by Balderdash
BREAKING: Rich people say they are not rich actually and would not like to give away some of their money
November 27, 2025 at 9:08 AM
BREAKING: Rich people say they are not rich actually and would not like to give away some of their money
Amazing to think that The Mayflower left Plymouth in England and landed in Plymouth in the US. What are the fucking chances?
November 27, 2025 at 8:44 AM
Amazing to think that The Mayflower left Plymouth in England and landed in Plymouth in the US. What are the fucking chances?
Reposted by Balderdash
Has John Cleese had a bit of work done?
November 27, 2025 at 7:43 AM
Has John Cleese had a bit of work done?
Would have been absurd to really suggest this a couple of weeks ago but Slot must be quite close to losing his job now.
November 26, 2025 at 9:52 PM
Would have been absurd to really suggest this a couple of weeks ago but Slot must be quite close to losing his job now.
Reposted by Balderdash
Ourobour-bus
So this happened in Oslo yesterday. Four articulated buses got stuck in a roundabout.
November 26, 2025 at 7:04 PM
Ourobour-bus
Tax ideas for raising revenue
1) Cucurella tax: hair by volume
2) The 6/7 tax: £1 each time someone smirks/grins when aforementioned is uttered
3) Farage tax: £1 every time someone is racist
4) Trump tax: £1 every time someone says something stupid
5) Tony Parsons tax: £1 when someone is a cunt
1) Cucurella tax: hair by volume
2) The 6/7 tax: £1 each time someone smirks/grins when aforementioned is uttered
3) Farage tax: £1 every time someone is racist
4) Trump tax: £1 every time someone says something stupid
5) Tony Parsons tax: £1 when someone is a cunt
November 26, 2025 at 6:57 PM
Tax ideas for raising revenue
1) Cucurella tax: hair by volume
2) The 6/7 tax: £1 each time someone smirks/grins when aforementioned is uttered
3) Farage tax: £1 every time someone is racist
4) Trump tax: £1 every time someone says something stupid
5) Tony Parsons tax: £1 when someone is a cunt
1) Cucurella tax: hair by volume
2) The 6/7 tax: £1 each time someone smirks/grins when aforementioned is uttered
3) Farage tax: £1 every time someone is racist
4) Trump tax: £1 every time someone says something stupid
5) Tony Parsons tax: £1 when someone is a cunt
Reposted by Balderdash
I've seen some exclusive clips of the final series of Stranger Things. I'm pleased to say they've still got that 80s thing down beautifully.
November 26, 2025 at 6:36 PM
I've seen some exclusive clips of the final series of Stranger Things. I'm pleased to say they've still got that 80s thing down beautifully.
Really looking forward to Arsenal v Bayern later. Probably the best two sides in Europe in the first half of the season.
November 26, 2025 at 5:57 PM
Really looking forward to Arsenal v Bayern later. Probably the best two sides in Europe in the first half of the season.
Today’s philosophy poser:
Is cream chimneys a better metaphor for willies or boobies?
Is cream chimneys a better metaphor for willies or boobies?
November 26, 2025 at 11:59 AM
Today’s philosophy poser:
Is cream chimneys a better metaphor for willies or boobies?
Is cream chimneys a better metaphor for willies or boobies?
The most outrageous aspect of the 6,7 craze is that its inspiration isn’t the Pixies’ ‘This Monkey’s Gone to Heaven.’
November 26, 2025 at 10:37 AM
The most outrageous aspect of the 6,7 craze is that its inspiration isn’t the Pixies’ ‘This Monkey’s Gone to Heaven.’