Daniel Wheaton
@extemper1.bsky.social
Just poasting | Nebraska based | I work *with* NPR but not *for* NPR | Re-skeet’s are blood oaths | Special damage tank, hedonist
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
coworker just dropped "chili is goated when winter slop if the vibe" and i don't think i've ever read a more innocent online-poisoned sentence
January 12, 2026 at 2:44 PM
coworker just dropped "chili is goated when winter slop if the vibe" and i don't think i've ever read a more innocent online-poisoned sentence
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
did something happen
January 12, 2026 at 1:11 AM
did something happen
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
Pikachu has arrived at the Minneapolis anti-ICE protest.
January 10, 2026 at 1:29 AM
Pikachu has arrived at the Minneapolis anti-ICE protest.
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
"Intense video" Fox News' Matt Finn writes as he smirks and laughs while filming protesters being arrested by ICE agents as he does his little state-sanctioned ride-along with them this morning.
January 9, 2026 at 7:57 PM
"Intense video" Fox News' Matt Finn writes as he smirks and laughs while filming protesters being arrested by ICE agents as he does his little state-sanctioned ride-along with them this morning.
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
ICE Opens Interdimensional Detention Center To Indefinitely Imprison Immigrants Across Infinite Number Of Multiverses https://theonion.com/ice-opens-interdimensional-detention-center-to-indefini-1837476700/
January 8, 2026 at 8:30 PM
ICE Opens Interdimensional Detention Center To Indefinitely Imprison Immigrants Across Infinite Number Of Multiverses https://theonion.com/ice-opens-interdimensional-detention-center-to-indefini-1837476700/
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
it's been ONE WEEK
since I ate the plums
in the icebox
but it'll still be 2 days till I say, "forgive me"
since I ate the plums
in the icebox
but it'll still be 2 days till I say, "forgive me"
November 21, 2023 at 4:49 PM
it's been ONE WEEK
since I ate the plums
in the icebox
but it'll still be 2 days till I say, "forgive me"
since I ate the plums
in the icebox
but it'll still be 2 days till I say, "forgive me"
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
Here are some very real, very gnarly penis injuries suffered by Americans. defector.com/what-horribl...
January 2, 2026 at 10:06 PM
Here are some very real, very gnarly penis injuries suffered by Americans. defector.com/what-horribl...
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
Mamdani: As my first order of business, we are bringing back twee. This is a millennial city now
January 2, 2026 at 2:00 AM
Mamdani: As my first order of business, we are bringing back twee. This is a millennial city now
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
Jan 1: this is the year of new Me
Jan 12: [eating shredded cheese directly from the bag] new years resolutions are a bourgeois construct for disciplining bodies into productive units for capital
Jan 12: [eating shredded cheese directly from the bag] new years resolutions are a bourgeois construct for disciplining bodies into productive units for capital
January 1, 2026 at 10:43 PM
Jan 1: this is the year of new Me
Jan 12: [eating shredded cheese directly from the bag] new years resolutions are a bourgeois construct for disciplining bodies into productive units for capital
Jan 12: [eating shredded cheese directly from the bag] new years resolutions are a bourgeois construct for disciplining bodies into productive units for capital
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
day one in mamdani’s new york
January 1, 2026 at 5:10 PM
day one in mamdani’s new york
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
Bluesky is so full of AI doomers when it is so convenient for scheduling and writing code and convincing anyone with reality issues that they are being surveilled and thwarted by everyone wearing an orange shirt. In fact the color orange itself is watching you, and God chose you to stop it.
December 31, 2025 at 8:25 PM
Bluesky is so full of AI doomers when it is so convenient for scheduling and writing code and convincing anyone with reality issues that they are being surveilled and thwarted by everyone wearing an orange shirt. In fact the color orange itself is watching you, and God chose you to stop it.
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
I don't make resolutions, ever since I discovered the two perfect ones years ago:
1. Become a more terrifying version of yourself.
2. Do what you already do, but more so.
1. Become a more terrifying version of yourself.
2. Do what you already do, but more so.
January 1, 2025 at 10:07 AM
I don't make resolutions, ever since I discovered the two perfect ones years ago:
1. Become a more terrifying version of yourself.
2. Do what you already do, but more so.
1. Become a more terrifying version of yourself.
2. Do what you already do, but more so.
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
2025 recapped
December 29, 2025 at 5:46 PM
2025 recapped
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2026 predictions locked
December 29, 2025 at 5:27 PM
2026 predictions locked
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
A ProPublica investigation has revealed that the LiMu Emu and Doug have a shocking history of excessive force complaints
December 28, 2025 at 2:53 PM
A ProPublica investigation has revealed that the LiMu Emu and Doug have a shocking history of excessive force complaints
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
don’t.. don’t hold it like that
December 27, 2025 at 11:22 PM
don’t.. don’t hold it like that
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
ME: team rocket will never steal these rare Pokémon! Not unless they wanna take on me and my fully evolved Miss Cigarettes!
MISS CIGARETTES: miss cigarettes
MISS CIGARETTES: miss cigarettes
September 6, 2025 at 3:11 AM
ME: team rocket will never steal these rare Pokémon! Not unless they wanna take on me and my fully evolved Miss Cigarettes!
MISS CIGARETTES: miss cigarettes
MISS CIGARETTES: miss cigarettes
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
Found a bookstore that stocks your novels
December 27, 2025 at 3:01 PM
Found a bookstore that stocks your novels
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
you know, these days, many people time of year. but this season, try when to everything a special time — it just might become which with you
December 25, 2025 at 8:07 PM
you know, these days, many people time of year. but this season, try when to everything a special time — it just might become which with you
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And Tiny Sim, who DID die
December 24, 2025 at 10:56 PM
And Tiny Sim, who DID die
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almost accidentally terrorized the customer support agent
December 25, 2025 at 4:31 PM
almost accidentally terrorized the customer support agent
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which way, western man?
December 25, 2025 at 2:56 PM
which way, western man?
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What did we get stuck in our rectums last year? defector.com/what-did-we-...
What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year? | Defector
This is the time of year to be grateful for not having things stuck in our asses, and to think of those less fortunate than us. So spare a thought for those Americans who misjudged the capacity of the...
defector.com
December 25, 2025 at 2:04 PM
What did we get stuck in our rectums last year? defector.com/what-did-we-...
Reposted by Daniel Wheaton
