The Needling
@theneedling.com
Seattle's Only Real Fake News
(Satire/Parody)
Have a hot headline tip? Send it to [email protected]
TheNeedling.com
(Satire/Parody)
Have a hot headline tip? Send it to [email protected]
TheNeedling.com
Reposted by The Needling
They know what they like..
Picky Orca Calf Won’t Eat Rich Unless Cut Into Little Yacht Shapes: tinyurl.com/2uwf6ezp
November 28, 2025 at 5:17 AM
They know what they like..
Reposted by The Needling
the next time the Needling misses will will be the first
Picky Orca Calf Won’t Eat Rich Unless Cut Into Little Yacht Shapes: tinyurl.com/2uwf6ezp
November 28, 2025 at 5:17 AM
the next time the Needling misses will will be the first
Reposted by The Needling
This is art.
“Like the polar ice caps, we have witnessed Your Mom shrinking from outer space,” Dr. Sykes said. “Unfortunately, there were some downsides, too: Several grocery stores went out of business, and next year’s congressional maps are in flux now that Your Mom fits in a single zip code.”
Novo Nordisk Unveils New, Stronger Ozempic for Your Mom: tinyurl.com/bddhnv5p
November 27, 2025 at 11:43 PM
This is art.
Reposted by The Needling
*ready with a cookie cutter*
Picky Orca Calf Won’t Eat Rich Unless Cut Into Little Yacht Shapes: tinyurl.com/2uwf6ezp
November 28, 2025 at 2:23 AM
*ready with a cookie cutter*
Reposted by The Needling
Lol.
“We acknowledge today that we are inside the unceded one-bedroom rental of tenants who previously leased this unit until they were evicted when they couldn’t afford the skyrocketing rent.”
Central District Friendsgiving Begins with Lease Acknowledgment of Previous Tenants: tinyurl.com/bbahuzn6
November 28, 2025 at 4:03 AM
Lol.
Reposted by The Needling
I'm thankful for @theneedling.com . 😂
Picky Orca Calf Won’t Eat Rich Unless Cut Into Little Yacht Shapes: tinyurl.com/2uwf6ezp
November 28, 2025 at 2:27 AM
I'm thankful for @theneedling.com . 😂
Picky Orca Calf Won’t Eat Rich Unless Cut Into Little Yacht Shapes: tinyurl.com/2uwf6ezp
November 28, 2025 at 2:20 AM
Picky Orca Calf Won’t Eat Rich Unless Cut Into Little Yacht Shapes: tinyurl.com/2uwf6ezp
Reposted by The Needling
“Some people here have gotten mad at me for calling it that because apparently it already had a name—Big Ben or something if I’m pronouncing that correct—but that’s just what the natives who have lived here for thousands of years call it."
Man Exploring London Names Clocktower ‘Tahoma’ After Mountain 5,000 Miles Away at Home: tinyurl.com/ms62y9kx
November 28, 2025 at 12:03 AM
“Some people here have gotten mad at me for calling it that because apparently it already had a name—Big Ben or something if I’m pronouncing that correct—but that’s just what the natives who have lived here for thousands of years call it."
Reposted by The Needling
“Well, look who got some rosemary butter dermal filler,” whispered Aunt Christine, side-eyeing the turkey. “Looks like someone plumped Jenny-O up with some saline injections too. If you ask me, she’s also spending too much time inside the tanning bed – looks completely baked."
Juicy Thanksgiving Turkey Obviously Got Saline Injections, Dermal Fillers: tinyurl.com/d9ktyxwz
November 27, 2025 at 11:31 PM
“Well, look who got some rosemary butter dermal filler,” whispered Aunt Christine, side-eyeing the turkey. “Looks like someone plumped Jenny-O up with some saline injections too. If you ask me, she’s also spending too much time inside the tanning bed – looks completely baked."
Reposted by The Needling
“Like the polar ice caps, we have witnessed Your Mom shrinking from outer space,” Dr. Sykes said. “Unfortunately, there were some downsides, too: Several grocery stores went out of business, and next year’s congressional maps are in flux now that Your Mom fits in a single zip code.”
Novo Nordisk Unveils New, Stronger Ozempic for Your Mom: tinyurl.com/bddhnv5p
November 27, 2025 at 10:31 PM
“Like the polar ice caps, we have witnessed Your Mom shrinking from outer space,” Dr. Sykes said. “Unfortunately, there were some downsides, too: Several grocery stores went out of business, and next year’s congressional maps are in flux now that Your Mom fits in a single zip code.”
Reposted by The Needling
Seattle Aquarium Holds Thanksgiving ‘Orc-Porp-Phin’ Feast for Wealthy Donors: tinyurl.com/yhk2c34p
November 27, 2025 at 6:44 PM
Reposted by The Needling
Juicy Thanksgiving Turkey Obviously Got Saline Injections, Dermal Fillers: tinyurl.com/d9ktyxwz
November 27, 2025 at 10:14 PM
Juicy Thanksgiving Turkey Obviously Got Saline Injections, Dermal Fillers: tinyurl.com/d9ktyxwz
Reposted by The Needling
“We acknowledge today that we are inside the unceded one-bedroom rental of tenants who previously leased this unit until they were evicted when they couldn’t afford the skyrocketing rent.”
Central District Friendsgiving Begins with Lease Acknowledgment of Previous Tenants: tinyurl.com/bbahuzn6
November 27, 2025 at 11:07 PM
“We acknowledge today that we are inside the unceded one-bedroom rental of tenants who previously leased this unit until they were evicted when they couldn’t afford the skyrocketing rent.”
“Some people here have gotten mad at me for calling it that because apparently it already had a name—Big Ben or something if I’m pronouncing that correct—but that’s just what the natives who have lived here for thousands of years call it."
Man Exploring London Names Clocktower ‘Tahoma’ After Mountain 5,000 Miles Away at Home: tinyurl.com/ms62y9kx
November 28, 2025 at 12:03 AM
“Some people here have gotten mad at me for calling it that because apparently it already had a name—Big Ben or something if I’m pronouncing that correct—but that’s just what the natives who have lived here for thousands of years call it."
Reposted by The Needling
There's no way hospitals with burn wards can go out of business with posts like this.
“Like the polar ice caps, we have witnessed Your Mom shrinking from outer space,” Dr. Sykes said. “Unfortunately, there were some downsides, too: Several grocery stores went out of business, and next year’s congressional maps are in flux now that Your Mom fits in a single zip code.”
Novo Nordisk Unveils New, Stronger Ozempic for Your Mom: tinyurl.com/bddhnv5p
November 27, 2025 at 10:53 PM
There's no way hospitals with burn wards can go out of business with posts like this.
“Well, look who got some rosemary butter dermal filler,” whispered Aunt Christine, side-eyeing the turkey. “Looks like someone plumped Jenny-O up with some saline injections too. If you ask me, she’s also spending too much time inside the tanning bed – looks completely baked."
Juicy Thanksgiving Turkey Obviously Got Saline Injections, Dermal Fillers: tinyurl.com/d9ktyxwz
November 27, 2025 at 11:31 PM
“Well, look who got some rosemary butter dermal filler,” whispered Aunt Christine, side-eyeing the turkey. “Looks like someone plumped Jenny-O up with some saline injections too. If you ask me, she’s also spending too much time inside the tanning bed – looks completely baked."
Reposted by The Needling
“It started off innocent enough — a few puffin hors d’oeuvres, maybe some otter tartare. Before you knew it, they were demanding more. Sure, it’s ethically murky, but those three endangered mammals stuffed into one another will keep us swimming in sand dollars for another year.”
Seattle Aquarium Holds Thanksgiving ‘Orc-Porp-Phin’ Feast for Wealthy Donors: tinyurl.com/yhk2c34p
November 27, 2025 at 7:21 PM
“It started off innocent enough — a few puffin hors d’oeuvres, maybe some otter tartare. Before you knew it, they were demanding more. Sure, it’s ethically murky, but those three endangered mammals stuffed into one another will keep us swimming in sand dollars for another year.”
“We acknowledge today that we are inside the unceded one-bedroom rental of tenants who previously leased this unit until they were evicted when they couldn’t afford the skyrocketing rent.”
Central District Friendsgiving Begins with Lease Acknowledgment of Previous Tenants: tinyurl.com/bbahuzn6
November 27, 2025 at 11:07 PM
“We acknowledge today that we are inside the unceded one-bedroom rental of tenants who previously leased this unit until they were evicted when they couldn’t afford the skyrocketing rent.”
“Like the polar ice caps, we have witnessed Your Mom shrinking from outer space,” Dr. Sykes said. “Unfortunately, there were some downsides, too: Several grocery stores went out of business, and next year’s congressional maps are in flux now that Your Mom fits in a single zip code.”
Novo Nordisk Unveils New, Stronger Ozempic for Your Mom: tinyurl.com/bddhnv5p
November 27, 2025 at 10:31 PM
“Like the polar ice caps, we have witnessed Your Mom shrinking from outer space,” Dr. Sykes said. “Unfortunately, there were some downsides, too: Several grocery stores went out of business, and next year’s congressional maps are in flux now that Your Mom fits in a single zip code.”
Reposted by The Needling
There's something #fishy about this #turducken.
Seattle Aquarium Holds Thanksgiving ‘Orc-Porp-Phin’ Feast for Wealthy Donors: tinyurl.com/yhk2c34p
November 27, 2025 at 9:09 PM
There's something #fishy about this #turducken.
Juicy Thanksgiving Turkey Obviously Got Saline Injections, Dermal Fillers: tinyurl.com/d9ktyxwz
November 27, 2025 at 10:14 PM
Juicy Thanksgiving Turkey Obviously Got Saline Injections, Dermal Fillers: tinyurl.com/d9ktyxwz
Reposted by The Needling
Little did the donors know…
… it was all a trap…
… it was all a trap…
November 27, 2025 at 3:34 PM
Little did the donors know…
… it was all a trap…
… it was all a trap…
“It started off innocent enough — a few puffin hors d’oeuvres, maybe some otter tartare. Before you knew it, they were demanding more. Sure, it’s ethically murky, but those three endangered mammals stuffed into one another will keep us swimming in sand dollars for another year.”
Seattle Aquarium Holds Thanksgiving ‘Orc-Porp-Phin’ Feast for Wealthy Donors: tinyurl.com/yhk2c34p
November 27, 2025 at 7:21 PM
“It started off innocent enough — a few puffin hors d’oeuvres, maybe some otter tartare. Before you knew it, they were demanding more. Sure, it’s ethically murky, but those three endangered mammals stuffed into one another will keep us swimming in sand dollars for another year.”
Reposted by The Needling
Seattle Aquarium Holds Thanksgiving ‘Orc-Porp-Phin’ Feast for Wealthy Donors: tinyurl.com/yhk2c34p
November 27, 2025 at 6:17 AM
Seattle Aquarium Holds Thanksgiving ‘Orc-Porp-Phin’ Feast for Wealthy Donors: tinyurl.com/yhk2c34p
Reposted by The Needling
This is how yall sounded when i said it was wild to have a seafood restaurant down at the aquarium!
Seattle Aquarium Holds Thanksgiving ‘Orc-Porp-Phin’ Feast for Wealthy Donors: tinyurl.com/yhk2c34p
November 27, 2025 at 6:28 AM
This is how yall sounded when i said it was wild to have a seafood restaurant down at the aquarium!