El Pandito
pandasophist.bsky.social
El Pandito
@pandasophist.bsky.social
I hope that you have a nice day.

And that we all don't die. But mostly the first thing.
Reposted by El Pandito
Dear foreign nationals in war-torn countries, terrorism hot-spots, and amidst our enemies:

If you help the United States, we’ll fuck you over and abandon you. Not the individual servicepeople or intelligence officers — they’ll fight for you. I mean the depraved, soulless leadership of the nation.
So now they’re going to be doing individualized re-review of tens of thousands of Afghan evacuees’ cases on TOP of the re-review of 200,000+ refugees who entered under Biden?
November 27, 2025 at 5:42 AM
Reposted by El Pandito
They asked him “How much must one smoke?

Said Beis Hillel: [There is] no minimum, one must not [smoke] to excess.
Said Beis Shammai: One [inhale] for oneself, [and one inhale each] for each racist uncle.

And the Halacha accords with Beis Hillel
November 25, 2025 at 8:07 PM
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You, parched of swag: Is that a—

Me, resplendent: —Saddam Hussein Yasser Arafat bromance watch? that’s right.
November 23, 2025 at 10:12 PM
No, it took YOU 11 hours to do a basic PC build and load an OS onto it.
November 23, 2025 at 4:34 AM
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It’s wild that the Bernie left never made inroads with Black voters with the message that Obama was a war criminal exactly as bad as George W. Bush and Dick Cheney. Bold strategy, Cotton.
November 21, 2025 at 11:58 PM
I think about a week's worth of timeout should do us for this
November 18, 2025 at 6:36 AM
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I long for a world where I am not *constantly* reminded, entirely and utterly against my will, of the icky sex proclivities of random mediocrities with money.
November 18, 2025 at 2:32 AM
November 16, 2025 at 3:13 PM
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You been hit by a smooth hymnal
What's from Chicago, hates Illinois Nazis, and is holy as fuck?

It's the Pope in 1982.
November 13, 2025 at 4:07 AM
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I am begging America to not be stupid enough to embrace a racist and an antisemite because Donald Trump thinks she's a meanie. Just grab some popcorn and watch the Nazis fight.
Trump: “I am withdrawing my support and Endorsement of ‘Congresswoman’ Marjorie Taylor Greene…”
November 15, 2025 at 3:21 AM
Maybe they just really liked the classic NES game, and didn't do any further research into it?
November 14, 2025 at 3:32 PM
Reposted by El Pandito
again i am perfectly fine with locking every one of Jeffrey Epstein's friends in prison, Democrat, Republican or Whatever.
Lest there be any insinuation that Dems spared their own. It would be tough for Kathy Ruemmler—Obama’s WH Counsel from 2011 to mid-2014—to come off looking worse in these docs the committee Dems released. oversightdemocrats.house.gov/sites/evo-su...
November 12, 2025 at 5:38 PM
Anyone who blurts out an opinion as fact and follows it up with "but we aren't ready to have that conversation" displays the kind of smug, arrogant, bullshit self assurance that makes me assume they are wrong, even if I would have agreed with the point otherwise.

Just infuriating.
November 12, 2025 at 3:22 PM
I hate to cheer on Philadelphia, but the Packers need to lose.

So...I suppose...go...birds.
bob ross from bob 's burgers is standing in front of a closet with clothes hanging on it .
ALT: bob ross from bob 's burgers is standing in front of a closet with clothes hanging on it .
media.tenor.com
November 11, 2025 at 2:55 AM
How the fuck is it even possible to lose $12 billion in a single quarter?
ICYMI: Microsoft’s charge “implies a more than $12 billion quarterly loss at OpenAI, said Firoz Valliji, an analyst at Bernstein.”

That “would mark one of the largest single-quarter losses for a tech company in history.”

@jessefelder.bsky.social $MSFT
www.wsj.com/livecoverage...
November 7, 2025 at 11:40 PM
Reposted by El Pandito
great day for the legal theory of "not guilty if it's funny enough"
November 6, 2025 at 7:55 PM
I, too, would absolutely vote to convict and should be placed on any and all such juries.
I am personally disgusted by this and would like to be on record that if I were presented with this set of facts, I would absolutely vote to convict per the judge's instructions.

The law is the law, and I have as little right to ignore that as a hypothetical prosecutor has reason to strike me.
straight-up jury nullification. this guy did it, confessed to it, and the jury instructions explicitly said that if he did it intentionally, it was assault.
November 6, 2025 at 10:13 PM
Justice, thy name is foot-long Italian, and thy avatar is Sean.
🚨🚨🚨 The jury has reached a verdict. Sean Dunn, aka the DC Sandwich Guy, has been found NOT GUILTY of assault.
November 6, 2025 at 8:41 PM
Reposted by El Pandito
Early reports from the front lines of right-wing media tonight are starting to trickle in. We’re being told “hoes mad”
November 5, 2025 at 2:40 AM
First female Mayor of Detroit, bay-beeeee
November 5, 2025 at 3:08 AM
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It's genuinely impressive how Pete cannot see his job as anything other than Toxic Terminal O-4 behavior with Fox Anchor Characteristics
This has absolutely nothing to do with readiness
November 2, 2025 at 6:21 PM
This thread fucks so hard.
This Mexican WWII poster is some of the hardest shit ever
October 30, 2025 at 6:18 AM
Leaving the E4 Mafia in a couple days. Been here so long I don’t even know what to do with myself.
a man is standing on a rug in a living room with stairs .
ALT: a man is standing on a rug in a living room with stairs .
media.tenor.com
October 29, 2025 at 6:34 PM
It still bothers me how stupid the left sounded when they heard the term "lethality" for the first time in their lives when Harris said it in her speech, and they flipped the fuck out.

Just dumbest, showing of their own ass ever.

Just talk to a veteran for once in your fucking life, y'alll.
October 29, 2025 at 12:04 AM
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I think Zohran would have been a mostly forgettable mayor if not for the insane racist attacks against him tbh
October 27, 2025 at 4:33 PM