Ted Berg
@ogtedberg.bsky.social
A body like Arnold with a Denzel face
Can’t figure out how to explain John Starks to my wife, or why it would be so delightful to me to one day own a Kia from John Starks Kia.
December 1, 2025 at 3:10 AM
Can’t figure out how to explain John Starks to my wife, or why it would be so delightful to me to one day own a Kia from John Starks Kia.
Reposted by Ted Berg
Don’t speak ill of Francisco Lindor anywhere near my timeline.
November 29, 2025 at 3:30 AM
Don’t speak ill of Francisco Lindor anywhere near my timeline.
Who’s going to tell him
November 28, 2025 at 11:52 PM
Who’s going to tell him
This dude is just such a fucking dick.
TRUMP: If you look at Somalia, they are taking over Minnesota.
REPORTER: What do the Somalians have to do with this Afghan guy who shot the National Guard members?
TRUMP: Ah, nothing. But Somalians have caused a lot of trouble. They're ripping us off.
REPORTER: What do the Somalians have to do with this Afghan guy who shot the National Guard members?
TRUMP: Ah, nothing. But Somalians have caused a lot of trouble. They're ripping us off.
November 28, 2025 at 3:17 AM
This dude is just such a fucking dick.
The president routinely says shit that would cost my 8-year-old his iPad time.
“You’re a stupid person” — Trump lashes out at a reporter who presses him on the fact that the suspected DC shooter was actually thoroughly vetted before he was let in the US from Afghanistan
November 28, 2025 at 2:51 AM
The president routinely says shit that would cost my 8-year-old his iPad time.
Reposted by Ted Berg
"a single person of this demographic may have committed a crime, therefore we must punish the entire demographic" is a policy response you may recognize from fascist governments dedicated to ethnic cleansing elsewhere.
November 27, 2025 at 5:52 AM
"a single person of this demographic may have committed a crime, therefore we must punish the entire demographic" is a policy response you may recognize from fascist governments dedicated to ethnic cleansing elsewhere.
Reposted by Ted Berg
worst forest/trees problem in generations is that a canto is A SECTION OF A LONG POEM. THAT'S IT. YOU DIDN'T WRITE A CANTO BECAUSE YOU THOUGHT THE WORD LOOKED COOL ON YOUR MEMOIR. CANTOS ARE POEMS. THAT LANGUAGE IS DYNAMIC DOES NOT MAKE YOUR SLAMBOOK A CANTO AMERICAN OR OTHERWISE
November 27, 2025 at 2:40 AM
worst forest/trees problem in generations is that a canto is A SECTION OF A LONG POEM. THAT'S IT. YOU DIDN'T WRITE A CANTO BECAUSE YOU THOUGHT THE WORD LOOKED COOL ON YOUR MEMOIR. CANTOS ARE POEMS. THAT LANGUAGE IS DYNAMIC DOES NOT MAKE YOUR SLAMBOOK A CANTO AMERICAN OR OTHERWISE
@benjaminkabak.com can you tell Mamdani to bring back trash cans? Been walking around with an empty juice box for like six blocks.
November 26, 2025 at 7:30 PM
@benjaminkabak.com can you tell Mamdani to bring back trash cans? Been walking around with an empty juice box for like six blocks.
I used to not like any pies but now I like some pies. Been down on cookies lately but I think that’s largely due to recent cookie trends. At my core I am a doughnut guy. Some cinnamon buns rank among the top desserts, but there is, generally speaking, too wide a variance in cinnamon-roll quality.
November 26, 2025 at 2:06 AM
I used to not like any pies but now I like some pies. Been down on cookies lately but I think that’s largely due to recent cookie trends. At my core I am a doughnut guy. Some cinnamon buns rank among the top desserts, but there is, generally speaking, too wide a variance in cinnamon-roll quality.
Life is batting 1.000 in solar systems we’ve explored, so it would be ridiculously presumptuous to assume there are no aliens. Also very presumptuous to assume they would come visit during the 0.000001% of the earth’s history in which humans have been writing shit down.
New polling on aliens
% of U.S. adult citizens who believe the following definitely or probably exist:
Aliens 56%
Bigfoot 28%
The Yeti 23%
The Loch Ness Monster 22%
Chupacabra 16%
today.yougov.com/health/artic...
% of U.S. adult citizens who believe the following definitely or probably exist:
Aliens 56%
Bigfoot 28%
The Yeti 23%
The Loch Ness Monster 22%
Chupacabra 16%
today.yougov.com/health/artic...
November 26, 2025 at 1:58 AM
Life is batting 1.000 in solar systems we’ve explored, so it would be ridiculously presumptuous to assume there are no aliens. Also very presumptuous to assume they would come visit during the 0.000001% of the earth’s history in which humans have been writing shit down.
The 7th floor of my building smelled distinctly of bongwater for at least the last three years, then all of a sudden last week started smelling like tomato-basil soup. My wife thinks maybe the bongwater guy moved out but I say Jesus is here doing his greatest miracle yet.
November 25, 2025 at 2:24 AM
The 7th floor of my building smelled distinctly of bongwater for at least the last three years, then all of a sudden last week started smelling like tomato-basil soup. My wife thinks maybe the bongwater guy moved out but I say Jesus is here doing his greatest miracle yet.
Want my take on the Brandon Nimmo trade? No!? Oh.
November 24, 2025 at 1:07 AM
Want my take on the Brandon Nimmo trade? No!? Oh.
We don’t talk enough about how Jasson Dominguez is the Munch King.
November 23, 2025 at 3:45 PM
We don’t talk enough about how Jasson Dominguez is the Munch King.
Well they should obviously also do zoned residential parking like every other big city but apparently the parking garage lobby is incredibly powerful.
No street parking for out of state plates.
November 23, 2025 at 3:33 PM
Well they should obviously also do zoned residential parking like every other big city but apparently the parking garage lobby is incredibly powerful.
Reposted by Ted Berg
I know Chicago and Cambridge (MA) are installing cameras on buses that can take photos of cars parked in bus and bike lanes
November 23, 2025 at 3:09 PM
I know Chicago and Cambridge (MA) are installing cameras on buses that can take photos of cars parked in bus and bike lanes
Reposted by Ted Berg
NYC gets over a billion in traffic tickets every year and the estimated cost of free busses is $800 mil so I don’t think this is far fetched, plus “they’re ticketing Real New Yorkers so illegal immigrants can ride the bus for free” might actually make some outer boroughs shit heads stroke out
November 23, 2025 at 3:11 PM
NYC gets over a billion in traffic tickets every year and the estimated cost of free busses is $800 mil so I don’t think this is far fetched, plus “they’re ticketing Real New Yorkers so illegal immigrants can ride the bus for free” might actually make some outer boroughs shit heads stroke out
Not kidding when I say they should fund the free buses by actually enforcing driving and parking rules. Walk around any neighborhood of NYC for an hour and you will witness ~30 ticketable offenses. Everyone will get around faster if people follow the rules. Iron-fist it. Cameras on every stoplight.
Hochul has said she would neither support a plan that would deprive the MTA of a key revenue stream — fares — nor would she raise taxes to make up for the missing swipes.
Gov. Hochul Vague on Free Bus Plans As Her Open Budget Salvo Nears - Streetsblog New York City
Hochul has said she would neither support a plan that would deprive the MTA of a key revenue stream — fares — nor would she raise taxes to make up for the missing swipes.
buff.ly
November 23, 2025 at 3:05 PM
Not kidding when I say they should fund the free buses by actually enforcing driving and parking rules. Walk around any neighborhood of NYC for an hour and you will witness ~30 ticketable offenses. Everyone will get around faster if people follow the rules. Iron-fist it. Cameras on every stoplight.
If you’re looking to hire an experienced journalist who *won’t* watch RFK Jr. jack off on camera, my DMs are open.
November 23, 2025 at 2:16 AM
If you’re looking to hire an experienced journalist who *won’t* watch RFK Jr. jack off on camera, my DMs are open.
I want razor-sharp sideburns on Mike Trout by opening day
November 22, 2025 at 12:58 AM
I want razor-sharp sideburns on Mike Trout by opening day
Now imagine it was Andrew Cuomo
November 21, 2025 at 9:40 PM
Now imagine it was Andrew Cuomo
Reposted by Ted Berg
Zohran flip your hair again we need healthcare get him to give us healthcare.
November 21, 2025 at 9:26 PM
Zohran flip your hair again we need healthcare get him to give us healthcare.
Reposted by Ted Berg
If you don’t like the new mayor then get your own fuckin mayor alright?
June 27, 2025 at 3:25 AM
If you don’t like the new mayor then get your own fuckin mayor alright?
Welcome to Astoria, motorists. Make a U-turn wherever you want. Not in the mood to keep driving? That's fine, just throw your hazards on and get out. Your car will be fine there until you're done with your shopping. Oh, you want to parallel park in a parking spot? Fuck you, you fucking showoff snob.
November 21, 2025 at 3:49 PM
Welcome to Astoria, motorists. Make a U-turn wherever you want. Not in the mood to keep driving? That's fine, just throw your hazards on and get out. Your car will be fine there until you're done with your shopping. Oh, you want to parallel park in a parking spot? Fuck you, you fucking showoff snob.