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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire

@msico.bsky.social

320 followers 230 following 3.7K posts

(he/him) I like coffee. Programmer/magician for Atooi and Transolar. I have no sense of humor and also I never lie. I am normal and can be trusted with strawberries. I have never wavered in my belief that THE PUZZLES ARE ALIVE

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · Jun 25

it had to happen

the pokemon Koffing wearing blue jeans. as it does not have any legs, it has to wear a belt and the jeans flap loosely underneath

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 16h

Why do witches avoid eating gluten?

Crone's Disease

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 15h

if a dog spat ice cream into a bowl, would you eat it?

this question is brought to you by the pokemon Alcremie

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 15h

if a dog spat ice cream into a bowl, would you eat it?

this question is brought to you by the pokemon Alcremie

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Reposted by Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire

Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · Oct 15

Think a friend may be a skeleton? Ask them to bite into a sandwich. If it falls out of their ribs to the ground, that's strike one

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · Oct 16

If you think a friend may be a mummy, ask them to come sleep over. If the coffin they bring is FANCY or GOLD, that's a clue! Normal coffin? Just a vampire

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 16h

Why do witches avoid eating gluten?

Crone's Disease

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Reposted by Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire

paris martineau @paris.nyc · 1d

my latest investigation for @consumerreports.org is based on months of reporting and 60+ lab tests of leading protein supplements

we found that most protein powders and shakes have more lead in one serving than our experts say is safe to have in a day (🧵)

www.consumerreports.org/lead/protein...

Protein Powders and Shakes Contain High Levels of Lead - Consumer Reports

CR tests of 23 popular protein powders and shakes found that most contain high levels of lead.

www.consumerreports.org

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 20h

Lemon Pepper Shrimp & Cauliflower

another easy one, using simple spices and flavors (and a lot of butter).

Shrimp and cauliflower in a big saucepan

Reposted by Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire

Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 1d

Two witches walk into a bar and order drinks. The bartender says, "Would you like some sandwiches?" They look at him, confused. "Why would we order sand?"

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · Oct 14

It's difficult to work with all these ghosts in my office. My computer keeps giving me the boo screen of death

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · Oct 14

If you live by a graveyard, skeleton-proof your house with things that aren't cool. Skeletons only spend their time at hip joints

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · Oct 15

Mummies are very hard workers, because they're afraid that if they take a vacation they might start to unwind

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · Oct 14

Most monsters prefer solitude because they struggle to get along with each other. Except for Cyclopses. They always see eye to eye

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 1d

Two witches walk into a bar and order drinks. The bartender says, "Would you like some sandwiches?" They look at him, confused. "Why would we order sand?"

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 1d

anxiously awaiting my ticket out of North Texas

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 1d

it's already the big dark early here but still in the (low) 90's for another week at least 😩

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 1d

Some novelists should have been poets instead. As an example, specifically Thomas Pynchon

Rachel Feder @rachelfeder.bsky.social · 2d

Tell me your most unhinged literary opinion, as a little treat

Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 1d

Keto Carnitas

pork shoulder slow cooked with some jalapeno and red onion, shredded, and then broiled to get those crispy burnt ends. gonna swap for low carb tortillas next time because lettuce leaves just don't cut it, but the meat is great and now I know I can make it if I can't find it abroad

three lettuce leaves covered in shredded pork

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 1d

Explains the smell. Peeee-yew!!

Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 2d

AHHHHHHH

Hostess FrankenCakes with S'CREAM filling

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 2d

So he died believing that it was, despite having evidence in hand that the native plants he brought back were absolutely not matches to what grew natively in China.

Anyway happy Indigenous People's Day!

Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 2d

Christopher Columbus thought that Cuba was mainland China, and sailed to and landed on it three times, but never actually, like. Sailed around it. Or even past it. Which would have led him to understand that it was not in fact Asia.

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · 2d

valid I was very short on time tonight

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · Oct 13

Skeletons are great at unlocking doors, but not from built in skeleton keys. It's actually because they've got a bone to pick with

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Dr. Phil Acula, Vampire @msico.bsky.social · Oct 14

Mummies actually have two holidays! Even if you forget to get them a present on Halloween, there's also Mummy's Day

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