Flat Pluto Society
@adhdgobl.in
Clinical research, baseball (LFG Mariners), and booze nerd living in Philly. My views are not my own. They are yours. You have my views now. Sorry. (he/him)
In case Bsky becomes too much of a ban-happy dump: https://jorts.horse/@flatplutosociety
In case Bsky becomes too much of a ban-happy dump: https://jorts.horse/@flatplutosociety
Have fun watching the Super Bowl, everyone! But remember, it doesn't matter who wins, or how good the game is, or how fun the party is. What's really important is that you place at least 100 bets on FanDuel by the time the half time show starts.
February 8, 2026 at 11:04 PM
Have fun watching the Super Bowl, everyone! But remember, it doesn't matter who wins, or how good the game is, or how fun the party is. What's really important is that you place at least 100 bets on FanDuel by the time the half time show starts.
The person with the "tip your landlord" sign HAS to be doing a bit.
February 8, 2026 at 9:33 PM
The person with the "tip your landlord" sign HAS to be doing a bit.
Proactively avoiding the most tedious posts imaginable.
February 8, 2026 at 4:57 PM
Proactively avoiding the most tedious posts imaginable.
Nick Castellanos is about to win a gold medal in snowboarding.
February 7, 2026 at 11:00 PM
Nick Castellanos is about to win a gold medal in snowboarding.
Unironically yes, this fucking rules.
February 6, 2026 at 1:56 AM
Unironically yes, this fucking rules.
Reposted by Flat Pluto Society
you can't go wrong with anything inside one of those red-nosed sometimes-birds
February 3, 2026 at 10:21 PM
you can't go wrong with anything inside one of those red-nosed sometimes-birds
My prediction for the Mariners/Cardinals/Rays three-way trade is that the deal is just Williamson for Donovan, and Tampa's only there to sit in a chair in the corner and watch.
February 2, 2026 at 10:39 PM
My prediction for the Mariners/Cardinals/Rays three-way trade is that the deal is just Williamson for Donovan, and Tampa's only there to sit in a chair in the corner and watch.
My favorite conspiracy theory is that Avril Lavigne was replaced by a body double in her early 20s because how else could you explain a young woman slightly changing her style and music. It's weird, it's low-stakes, and it doesn't get super racist and anti-semitic the second you scratch the surface.
there are two types of conspiracy theory:
1) racism
2) stuff the cia has literally admitted to doing
1) racism
2) stuff the cia has literally admitted to doing
February 2, 2026 at 3:18 PM
My favorite conspiracy theory is that Avril Lavigne was replaced by a body double in her early 20s because how else could you explain a young woman slightly changing her style and music. It's weird, it's low-stakes, and it doesn't get super racist and anti-semitic the second you scratch the surface.
I'm a single issue voter. I will support any candidate who promises to make Groundhog Day a national holiday.
February 2, 2026 at 3:12 PM
I'm a single issue voter. I will support any candidate who promises to make Groundhog Day a national holiday.
My dear friend Zane died three years ago today. There aren't a whole lot of people in my life who I truly miss, but I miss him every day. Tell your friends how much you care about them, more often than you think you need to.
And forever thanks to @ecppdx.bsky.social for initially introducing us.
And forever thanks to @ecppdx.bsky.social for initially introducing us.
January 31, 2026 at 11:29 PM
My dear friend Zane died three years ago today. There aren't a whole lot of people in my life who I truly miss, but I miss him every day. Tell your friends how much you care about them, more often than you think you need to.
And forever thanks to @ecppdx.bsky.social for initially introducing us.
And forever thanks to @ecppdx.bsky.social for initially introducing us.
Please let him rob a home run from Dumper, it would be so god damn funny.
The J-Rod Show will be on display at the #WorldBaseballClassic!
Julio Rodríguez is suiting up for Team Dominican Republic! 🇩🇴
Julio Rodríguez is suiting up for Team Dominican Republic! 🇩🇴
January 30, 2026 at 7:04 PM
Please let him rob a home run from Dumper, it would be so god damn funny.
Yakko Warner for Secretary of State
yakko's nations of the world song recognizes palestinian statehood
January 29, 2026 at 2:21 PM
Yakko Warner for Secretary of State
There are few things more depressing than the repeated reminders that the Democrats actually love right-wing authoritarian tactics as long as they're conducted in a way that doesn't end up all over the news.
"I'm gonna give Homan the benefit of the doubt"
"They should coordinate with local law enforcement, pick these people up in the middle of the night when they're not suspecting it"
Walz is capitulating to fascists and encouraging night raids. Genuinely disgusting. Why would anyone settle for this?
"They should coordinate with local law enforcement, pick these people up in the middle of the night when they're not suspecting it"
Walz is capitulating to fascists and encouraging night raids. Genuinely disgusting. Why would anyone settle for this?
January 28, 2026 at 12:33 AM
There are few things more depressing than the repeated reminders that the Democrats actually love right-wing authoritarian tactics as long as they're conducted in a way that doesn't end up all over the news.
Hire Jess! She makes cool games and also once brought homegrown tomatoes to board game night (these are equally important in a professional context, I think).
hi folks! i'm looking for full-time remote work in game design! my specialty is tabletop games (i've both self-published and contributed to award-winning & bestselling TTRPGs) but i've also written for jam-winning video games!
is your company hiring? get in touch & i can send my portfolio!
is your company hiring? get in touch & i can send my portfolio!
January 27, 2026 at 8:31 PM
Hire Jess! She makes cool games and also once brought homegrown tomatoes to board game night (these are equally important in a professional context, I think).
Rick Rizzs is the last vestige of the Mariners from my childhood. He's so talented, he's made so many iconic calls over the decades, and I really, REALLY hope he gets to call a World Series game in his final season.
www.mlb.com/press-releas...
www.mlb.com/press-releas...
Mariners Icon Rick Rizzs Announces Plan to Retire Following 2026 Season
SEATTLE — Rick Rizzs, who has spent 40 years regaling fans in the Northwest and across the country as the radio voice of the Mariners, announced today his plans to have the 2026 season be his final as...
www.mlb.com
January 27, 2026 at 7:06 PM
Rick Rizzs is the last vestige of the Mariners from my childhood. He's so talented, he's made so many iconic calls over the decades, and I really, REALLY hope he gets to call a World Series game in his final season.
www.mlb.com/press-releas...
www.mlb.com/press-releas...
I don't know why Seahawks fans are so excited about this guy, but I'm happy for them!
January 26, 2026 at 1:33 AM
I don't know why Seahawks fans are so excited about this guy, but I'm happy for them!
I love making food that is delicious as hell but looks like a horrifying cross between dog barf and the cafeteria gruel that they slop onto plates in prison movies.
January 25, 2026 at 5:41 PM
I love making food that is delicious as hell but looks like a horrifying cross between dog barf and the cafeteria gruel that they slop onto plates in prison movies.
Reposted by Flat Pluto Society
We need a Hoagiemouth revival of Les Miserables
January 23, 2026 at 8:13 PM
We need a Hoagiemouth revival of Les Miserables
If I'm going to get arrested, I want it to be because my WiFi-enabled tea kettle ratted me out.
just finished connecting all my smart devices up to the usas surveillance state
January 23, 2026 at 8:19 PM
If I'm going to get arrested, I want it to be because my WiFi-enabled tea kettle ratted me out.
If I had a nickel for every power-hitting outfielder from a California baseball team who is also a huge weather dork, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice.
Hahahahh I KNEW IT
January 23, 2026 at 6:59 PM
If I had a nickel for every power-hitting outfielder from a California baseball team who is also a huge weather dork, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice.
Philadelphia is the greatest country on Earth. Our national anthem is drunken yelling, our national dish is various wet meat sandwiches, and we are, as one united people, looking forward to giving Waymo cars the HitchBot treatment.
“everyone hates you, you fuckin American” idk what you’re talking about, I am a proud citizen of the greatest country in the world: PHILADELPHIA
January 21, 2026 at 5:01 PM
Philadelphia is the greatest country on Earth. Our national anthem is drunken yelling, our national dish is various wet meat sandwiches, and we are, as one united people, looking forward to giving Waymo cars the HitchBot treatment.
First they came for the pig poop balls, and I did not speak out because I was not a pig defecating on its own large testicles.
January 20, 2026 at 11:32 PM
First they came for the pig poop balls, and I did not speak out because I was not a pig defecating on its own large testicles.
