Noahconstrictor
@noahconstrictor.bsky.social
He/him
Bears, NFL, MTG, sports, metal, and whatever other nonsense I feel like posting
Bears, NFL, MTG, sports, metal, and whatever other nonsense I feel like posting
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
Grady Jarrett gets a hand on the fourth-down pass by Rudolph and the Bears are going to survive, moving to 8-3 on the season.
November 23, 2025 at 9:10 PM
Grady Jarrett gets a hand on the fourth-down pass by Rudolph and the Bears are going to survive, moving to 8-3 on the season.
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
Drew Magary is puking blood somewhere
November 23, 2025 at 8:54 PM
Drew Magary is puking blood somewhere
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
If I’m understanding this correctly, X is owned by a white nationalist who pays poor people of color in developing countries to pretend to be working class white Americans to scare other white Americans into being afraid poor people of color from developing countries are going to ruin America?
November 23, 2025 at 7:30 PM
If I’m understanding this correctly, X is owned by a white nationalist who pays poor people of color in developing countries to pretend to be working class white Americans to scare other white Americans into being afraid poor people of color from developing countries are going to ruin America?
Every other throw from him looks like this. Absolutely insane.
November 23, 2025 at 8:40 PM
Every other throw from him looks like this. Absolutely insane.
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
Seen today on the old Something Awful Forums:
“More like JJ McFartPee” - Posted by user Rectal Placenta
“More like JJ McFartPee” - Posted by user Rectal Placenta
November 23, 2025 at 8:08 PM
Seen today on the old Something Awful Forums:
“More like JJ McFartPee” - Posted by user Rectal Placenta
“More like JJ McFartPee” - Posted by user Rectal Placenta
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
Stuck ball alert
November 23, 2025 at 7:20 PM
Stuck ball alert
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
It turns out having nobody playing linebacker for you is actually bad
November 23, 2025 at 7:19 PM
It turns out having nobody playing linebacker for you is actually bad
Absolutely terrible day to wake up and know words mean things
November 22, 2025 at 2:57 PM
Absolutely terrible day to wake up and know words mean things
They're calling it the most cursed football game of all time
November 21, 2025 at 3:25 AM
They're calling it the most cursed football game of all time
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
Will Anderson Jr doing this to every tackle on the Bills rn
November 21, 2025 at 2:06 AM
Will Anderson Jr doing this to every tackle on the Bills rn
I'm going to think about this image for the rest of the week good LORD find someone that looks at you the way Ben Johnson looks at Caleb Williams
November 17, 2025 at 6:02 AM
I'm going to think about this image for the rest of the week good LORD find someone that looks at you the way Ben Johnson looks at Caleb Williams
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
NFC North standings after 11 weeks:
Bears 7-3
Packers 6-3-1
Lions 6-4
Vikings 4-6
Bears 7-3
Packers 6-3-1
Lions 6-4
Vikings 4-6
November 17, 2025 at 4:33 AM
NFC North standings after 11 weeks:
Bears 7-3
Packers 6-3-1
Lions 6-4
Vikings 4-6
Bears 7-3
Packers 6-3-1
Lions 6-4
Vikings 4-6
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
Jared Goff, you can quick kick without permission, nobody can stop you
November 17, 2025 at 3:41 AM
Jared Goff, you can quick kick without permission, nobody can stop you
Gibbs is absolutely insane. How is he that fast.
November 17, 2025 at 3:38 AM
Gibbs is absolutely insane. How is he that fast.
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
Bo Nix looks like one of those 50s athletes trying to sell you ovaltine
November 17, 2025 at 12:25 AM
Bo Nix looks like one of those 50s athletes trying to sell you ovaltine
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
This team, man.
Bears 19, Vikings 17
Ben Johnson gets his first division win. More to come.
Bears 19, Vikings 17
Ben Johnson gets his first division win. More to come.
November 16, 2025 at 9:03 PM
This team, man.
Bears 19, Vikings 17
Ben Johnson gets his first division win. More to come.
Bears 19, Vikings 17
Ben Johnson gets his first division win. More to come.
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
Report: Oyster Cracker–Wise, Nation Doing Pretty Good https://theonion.com/report-oyster-cracker-wise-nation-doing-pretty-good-1819578214/
November 16, 2025 at 8:00 PM
Report: Oyster Cracker–Wise, Nation Doing Pretty Good https://theonion.com/report-oyster-cracker-wise-nation-doing-pretty-good-1819578214/
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
How do you miss this?
November 16, 2025 at 7:51 PM
How do you miss this?
Absolutely vile missed face mask call.
November 16, 2025 at 7:50 PM
Absolutely vile missed face mask call.
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
That was a no call on the face mask in the Bears game??????
November 16, 2025 at 7:49 PM
That was a no call on the face mask in the Bears game??????
this is what I want to see from Steelers offensive players by the way, just the largest man you've ever seen bowling over some poor sap in a Bengals jersey
November 16, 2025 at 7:30 PM
this is what I want to see from Steelers offensive players by the way, just the largest man you've ever seen bowling over some poor sap in a Bengals jersey
Reposted by Noahconstrictor
Y’all that INT was Nine’s fault, not JJ
November 16, 2025 at 7:23 PM
Y’all that INT was Nine’s fault, not JJ
Kyle Monangai got that dawg in him man, I love this guy
November 16, 2025 at 7:04 PM
Kyle Monangai got that dawg in him man, I love this guy