Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
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drfunkin.bsky.social
Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
@drfunkin.bsky.social
Actually just three shitposts in a floral print. Abenaki Heritage. Agender Adonis. Pronouns: Any. Profile pic by @jeffpennington.art

Wrestlesplania Hunk of the Year
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
🚨 BREAKING: Zohran Mamdani to require all NYC students to carry a 3DS.
November 26, 2025 at 9:02 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
Lots of people sharing this clip because it's funny and cathartic but I also genuinely believe it's important.

We have to win the narrative battle between "I live in a corrupt society and that's just how it is" and "I live in a corrupt society and we are going to defeat and humiliate these ghouls."
Good morning to Brazilian reporter Manuela Borges, who’s been waiting eleven years for this petty moment. ❤️ 🇧🇷
November 26, 2025 at 4:07 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
The Thing is fundamentally a late January movie and if you don't get that, you've never lived somewhere with real winter
November 26, 2025 at 1:53 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
No, ChatGPT is not conscious. Are the journalists who keep writing these fucking articles?
November 25, 2025 at 10:27 PM
A classy dessert
November 26, 2025 at 1:17 AM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
Real confused as to what "ceasefire has held" means given the rest of the sentence.
The handover is part of last month’s fragile ceasefire that has held despite Israeli strikes on Gaza, mounting Palestinian casualties and mutual accusations of violations. https://to.pbs.org/4ogus70
Israeli military says the Red Cross has received another set of remains from Gaza militants
Palestinian Islamic Jihad said they found the body in a refugee camp in central Gaza.
to.pbs.org
November 25, 2025 at 7:38 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
they're calling this the most "weekend blockbuster rental that always sounds way more fun than it actually is" game of all time
November 25, 2025 at 5:03 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
BTW, if you're legitimately pissed off at Marvel for the whole "let's make a victim of sexual violence a happy subservient to her abuser" thing, the BEST way to affect change is withholding your money.

Let that whole event bomb sales wise.
November 25, 2025 at 3:36 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
Reminder that the holidays don’t have to be about consumerism. And if you like giving and getting gifts the whole Shop Small thing is very important. Handcrafted goods and homemade gifts are great too!
November 25, 2025 at 11:19 AM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
Some D&D group has done this with a party member.
TL cleanse.

Before acting, it is necessary to check. 😂
November 24, 2025 at 9:31 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
Have you called your credit card processor lately?
Spoke to my source familiar with internal workings at Mastercard. The holiday call campaign re payment processor censorship is working, there is a lot of pressure being felt from your calls. This is resulting in increased response times at a core moment for Mastercard due to the holiday season
November 24, 2025 at 8:50 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
Our school district somehow overspent by nearly $20 million dollars and now wants to raise everyone's taxes by nearly 2k this year and nearly $700 permanently so that the state doesn't bring in much-needed oversight. The whites in this town are a menace.
The letter writer states: “What I worry about with the people voting No/No is that the state will not do a forensic audit, just send in a state monitor.”

montclairlocal.news/2025/11/fall...
Falling Down The Deficit Rabbit Hole (Letter to the Editor)
If we don't understand how we got here, how can we fix it?
montclairlocal.news
November 24, 2025 at 6:36 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
⬇️
Here it is: The @wired.com Politics Issue is now live, with more stories rolling out all week. We're so proud of this one.

Behold this cover; truly a work of art.

And we're treating it that way: Starting today, you can find it on murals, billboards, and posters across in five U.S. cities.
November 24, 2025 at 4:26 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
My moon conspiracy theory is that every astronaut who sees the Earth from space immediately says “That’s a spicy meatball!” and NASA is covering it up.
November 24, 2025 at 12:39 AM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
thinkin about that period when the new day wanted to fight children
November 23, 2025 at 10:12 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
Wrestling was so much better before the internet, entirely because you had to go out of your way to be exposed to the shitty opinions of sad grifter cunts.
November 23, 2025 at 10:15 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
People have asked what cyberpunk is, cyberpunk is when you’re standing in the rain in a trenchcoat smoking a cigarette and there’s neon signs and you see an asian person
September 8, 2024 at 10:36 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
This is the generative AI non-use policy on my website: I am strongly considering actively including this prominently in any cold pitch email I send

If any media outlets sees this as a turn off, GOOD: I don't want to work for outlets that are neutral or open to fabrication and lies

ketanjoshi.co
November 23, 2025 at 7:17 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
Annual reminder about turkey frying safety:
November 23, 2025 at 8:51 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
November 22, 2025 at 7:46 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
You can say ICE is being used as a political cudgel to demolish democracy, or you can recognize that’s all they ever have been since their inception.
Attorney General Catherine Hanaway (R) publicly announced she has referred the state’s grassroots referendum campaign to Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), claiming without evidence that canvassers are “employing illegal aliens” to collect signatures to overturn the mid-decade redraw.
Missouri GOP Now Siccing ICE on Gerrymander Referendum Signature Gatherers
Read more here.
www.democracydocket.com
November 22, 2025 at 11:35 AM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
November 22, 2025 at 12:09 PM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
Kevin Sorbo was in his 30s and in peak physical condition (he was currently playing Hercules), and he had three strokes after he had his neck cracked by his chiropractor.
AARRGH. CHIROPRACTIC IS NOT MEDICINE, IT’S DANGEROUS BULLSHIT CREATED BY A FUCKING GROCER WHO THOUGHT HE COULD HEAL WITH MAGNETS. WHAT THE FUCK, AMERICA
Oh good, they left Chiropractors as professionals but not Nurses, NPs, PA’s or physical therapists

That’s infuriating
November 22, 2025 at 11:13 AM
Reposted by Duncan Parker Newton-Gaines, #1 Mech Pervert
the takeaway from the Zohran Trump meeting is that Trump is a gullible fool who will temporarily bend to the last charismatic person he talked to.

Zohran played him perfectly but that doesn’t mean Trump is good now. He’ll go back to fascism tomorrow morning after he talks to Stephen Miller
November 21, 2025 at 11:22 PM