AC Cross
@aaronccross.bsky.social
Author of Where Blood Runs Gold, The Boddicker Letters, and Zoo. Doctor but not that kind. Raconteur. Darn good cook. 100% undiluted awesome. Amateur memelord and shitposter.
www.aaronccross.com
www.aaronccross.com
Without downloading any new pics, what’s it like dating you?
November 28, 2025 at 3:24 AM
Without downloading any new pics, what’s it like dating you?
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen.
Iron Maiden
Metallica
Scorpions
Journey
Chicago
Iron Maiden
Metallica
Scorpions
Journey
Chicago
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen.
R.E.M.
Bastille
Britney Spears
Spice Girls
Green Day
R.E.M.
Bastille
Britney Spears
Spice Girls
Green Day
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen.
The Selecter
The Cure
Hawkwind
De La Soul
Primal Scream
The Selecter
The Cure
Hawkwind
De La Soul
Primal Scream
November 27, 2025 at 8:19 PM
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen.
Iron Maiden
Metallica
Scorpions
Journey
Chicago
Iron Maiden
Metallica
Scorpions
Journey
Chicago
Reposted by AC Cross
Whoops. How did this list of Patreon-exclusive story ideas drop here? I should probably pick it up before anyone gets excited about the ideas and subscribes. That would be terrible of me.
www.patreon.com/cw/aaronccross
www.patreon.com/cw/aaronccross
November 27, 2025 at 5:01 AM
Whoops. How did this list of Patreon-exclusive story ideas drop here? I should probably pick it up before anyone gets excited about the ideas and subscribes. That would be terrible of me.
www.patreon.com/cw/aaronccross
www.patreon.com/cw/aaronccross
Well, I just finished up being wrist-deep in a turkey's butthole stuffing butter under the skin, so it's officially Thanksgiving.
November 27, 2025 at 3:06 PM
Well, I just finished up being wrist-deep in a turkey's butthole stuffing butter under the skin, so it's officially Thanksgiving.
How I'm rolling up to Thanksgiving
November 27, 2025 at 2:02 PM
How I'm rolling up to Thanksgiving
Whoops. How did this list of Patreon-exclusive story ideas drop here? I should probably pick it up before anyone gets excited about the ideas and subscribes. That would be terrible of me.
www.patreon.com/cw/aaronccross
www.patreon.com/cw/aaronccross
November 27, 2025 at 5:01 AM
Whoops. How did this list of Patreon-exclusive story ideas drop here? I should probably pick it up before anyone gets excited about the ideas and subscribes. That would be terrible of me.
www.patreon.com/cw/aaronccross
www.patreon.com/cw/aaronccross
What is a trope you absolutely want to read and/or write more of?
I absolutely love when big, dumb, barbarian-style characters either have to or get to play fancy and dress up for an occasion. I’m doing a text DnD thing with friends for Thanksgiving. My barbarian is named Bigg and he has a top hat.
I absolutely love when big, dumb, barbarian-style characters either have to or get to play fancy and dress up for an occasion. I’m doing a text DnD thing with friends for Thanksgiving. My barbarian is named Bigg and he has a top hat.
November 26, 2025 at 10:44 PM
What is a trope you absolutely want to read and/or write more of?
I absolutely love when big, dumb, barbarian-style characters either have to or get to play fancy and dress up for an occasion. I’m doing a text DnD thing with friends for Thanksgiving. My barbarian is named Bigg and he has a top hat.
I absolutely love when big, dumb, barbarian-style characters either have to or get to play fancy and dress up for an occasion. I’m doing a text DnD thing with friends for Thanksgiving. My barbarian is named Bigg and he has a top hat.
Internet friends, let us speak of happy things because I am at work and I am in A Mood that is not conducive to customer service. Send memes, questions, whatever.
November 26, 2025 at 3:59 PM
Internet friends, let us speak of happy things because I am at work and I am in A Mood that is not conducive to customer service. Send memes, questions, whatever.
Replace 'Monday' with 'Wednesday' and 'the day before a holiday' but the message remains!
Okay, it's Monday so time for another push for ratings!
Before the end of the year, can we get Zoo to 50, WBRG to 30, and October Music to 10? More for Boddicker would be killer too, but I like round numbers.
Before the end of the year, can we get Zoo to 50, WBRG to 30, and October Music to 10? More for Boddicker would be killer too, but I like round numbers.
November 26, 2025 at 2:14 PM
Replace 'Monday' with 'Wednesday' and 'the day before a holiday' but the message remains!
Driving in the winter can eat the fattest, juiciest, most succulent selection of honey-roasted, butter-basted, hickory-smoked, organically grown dicks that have ever existed.
November 26, 2025 at 12:33 AM
Driving in the winter can eat the fattest, juiciest, most succulent selection of honey-roasted, butter-basted, hickory-smoked, organically grown dicks that have ever existed.
I don’t know why I drew what is essentially a sentient cereal dispenser pain-shitting Corn Pops onto the face of a toothless degen in what can best be described as a fetishistic manner but I HATE that I did.
November 25, 2025 at 10:49 PM
I don’t know why I drew what is essentially a sentient cereal dispenser pain-shitting Corn Pops onto the face of a toothless degen in what can best be described as a fetishistic manner but I HATE that I did.
Reposted by AC Cross
Always worth taking a moment to remind you if you’re pirating authors’ book you’re a shitty person. You can rail that our profession isn’t a profession all you want. You can paint yourself as an online revolutionary liberating ideas. It’s all bullshit.
You’re just a shitty person who hates writers.
You’re just a shitty person who hates writers.
November 24, 2025 at 3:08 PM
Always worth taking a moment to remind you if you’re pirating authors’ book you’re a shitty person. You can rail that our profession isn’t a profession all you want. You can paint yourself as an online revolutionary liberating ideas. It’s all bullshit.
You’re just a shitty person who hates writers.
You’re just a shitty person who hates writers.
*me looking at the 6-8 inches of snow we're supposed to get tonight and being already completely over dealing with winter*
a man in a green shirt is saying there is a storm coming .
Alt: a man in a green shirt is saying there is a storm coming .
media.tenor.com
November 24, 2025 at 2:20 PM
*me looking at the 6-8 inches of snow we're supposed to get tonight and being already completely over dealing with winter*
*actual conversation at the liquor store*:
Me: I don’t like the direction we’re going.
Brother: Me either. Get some Cuervo?
Me: Are we drinking tequila today? Is that what we’re doing?
Brother: Yes?
Me: Shit.
Me: I don’t like the direction we’re going.
Brother: Me either. Get some Cuervo?
Me: Are we drinking tequila today? Is that what we’re doing?
Brother: Yes?
Me: Shit.
November 22, 2025 at 4:16 PM
*actual conversation at the liquor store*:
Me: I don’t like the direction we’re going.
Brother: Me either. Get some Cuervo?
Me: Are we drinking tequila today? Is that what we’re doing?
Brother: Yes?
Me: Shit.
Me: I don’t like the direction we’re going.
Brother: Me either. Get some Cuervo?
Me: Are we drinking tequila today? Is that what we’re doing?
Brother: Yes?
Me: Shit.
This seems like moving the goalposts.
November 22, 2025 at 1:45 PM
This seems like moving the goalposts.
This goes double for those bright blue xenon bastards too.
i think if you want to have those disgusting LED headlights on your car, you should have to do a test where they blast you point blank with your own headlights and then you have 15 seconds to successfully complete some sort of vision-based task, and if you can't do it they push your car off a cliff
November 21, 2025 at 1:33 AM
This goes double for those bright blue xenon bastards too.
We all know the trend of happy-sounding songs with darker lyrics (e.g. Hey Ya) but what about the reverse? What are some songs that sound dark or eerie or haunting but the lyrics are kind of banal? My choice is Still Life by Men at Work. SUPER dark sounding...just a basic heartbroken song.
November 21, 2025 at 12:56 AM
We all know the trend of happy-sounding songs with darker lyrics (e.g. Hey Ya) but what about the reverse? What are some songs that sound dark or eerie or haunting but the lyrics are kind of banal? My choice is Still Life by Men at Work. SUPER dark sounding...just a basic heartbroken song.
1998 ESPN: Wake up to Stuart Scott going over the highlights from the day before. He’s like a cool big brother.
2025 ESPN: Jimmy-Jack Fuckwagon from Pacawanna, FL won $45K on Fanduelsportskings so sign up now and we’ll waive your first month’s organ mortgage!
Don’t tell me things are better now.
2025 ESPN: Jimmy-Jack Fuckwagon from Pacawanna, FL won $45K on Fanduelsportskings so sign up now and we’ll waive your first month’s organ mortgage!
Don’t tell me things are better now.
November 20, 2025 at 8:19 PM
1998 ESPN: Wake up to Stuart Scott going over the highlights from the day before. He’s like a cool big brother.
2025 ESPN: Jimmy-Jack Fuckwagon from Pacawanna, FL won $45K on Fanduelsportskings so sign up now and we’ll waive your first month’s organ mortgage!
Don’t tell me things are better now.
2025 ESPN: Jimmy-Jack Fuckwagon from Pacawanna, FL won $45K on Fanduelsportskings so sign up now and we’ll waive your first month’s organ mortgage!
Don’t tell me things are better now.
I mean, it's true.
Today is going to be an EFFORT, I think.
Today is going to be an EFFORT, I think.
November 20, 2025 at 4:00 PM
I mean, it's true.
Today is going to be an EFFORT, I think.
Today is going to be an EFFORT, I think.
I see you porkin' in there!
November 20, 2025 at 2:40 AM
I see you porkin' in there!
Dropping another one.
A spiced sandwich with absolute power?
Autocratic sage wrap.
A spiced sandwich with absolute power?
Autocratic sage wrap.
You get into a car accident but, as you step out of the car, you see a cute puppy trotting around.
Automatic rage sap.
Automatic rage sap.
Your child has a colorful article of clothing?
Problem beige gap.
Problem beige gap.
November 20, 2025 at 12:45 AM
Dropping another one.
A spiced sandwich with absolute power?
Autocratic sage wrap.
A spiced sandwich with absolute power?
Autocratic sage wrap.
You get into a car accident but, as you step out of the car, you see a cute puppy trotting around.
Automatic rage sap.
Automatic rage sap.
Your child has a colorful article of clothing?
Problem beige gap.
Problem beige gap.
Your piercing doesn’t look the way you hoped it would?
Problematic gauge gap.
Problematic gauge gap.
November 20, 2025 at 12:23 AM
You get into a car accident but, as you step out of the car, you see a cute puppy trotting around.
Automatic rage sap.
Automatic rage sap.
Here is why I should be nobody's hero:
I am 39 years old with a Phd and yet, when faced with deli turkey that makes me say 'that doesn't smell great', I still make a sandwich and eat it with the argument 'whatever, I'll just get sick' and then have the AUDACITY to get upset when I get tummy rumbles.
I am 39 years old with a Phd and yet, when faced with deli turkey that makes me say 'that doesn't smell great', I still make a sandwich and eat it with the argument 'whatever, I'll just get sick' and then have the AUDACITY to get upset when I get tummy rumbles.
November 20, 2025 at 12:15 AM
Here is why I should be nobody's hero:
I am 39 years old with a Phd and yet, when faced with deli turkey that makes me say 'that doesn't smell great', I still make a sandwich and eat it with the argument 'whatever, I'll just get sick' and then have the AUDACITY to get upset when I get tummy rumbles.
I am 39 years old with a Phd and yet, when faced with deli turkey that makes me say 'that doesn't smell great', I still make a sandwich and eat it with the argument 'whatever, I'll just get sick' and then have the AUDACITY to get upset when I get tummy rumbles.