Willie Fitzgerald
@williefitz.bsky.social
Mr. Lunch
Writer, editor, galoot. Stories in Joyland, Boulevard, StoryQuarterly and elsewhere. Senior Editor at American Short Fiction.
Writer, editor, galoot. Stories in Joyland, Boulevard, StoryQuarterly and elsewhere. Senior Editor at American Short Fiction.
introducing Jorpoise: the porpoise with a job
November 29, 2025 at 6:49 PM
introducing Jorpoise: the porpoise with a job
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
The great thing about Stephen King's "Stand by Me" is that it also works as "Stand, by Me"
November 29, 2025 at 6:35 PM
The great thing about Stephen King's "Stand by Me" is that it also works as "Stand, by Me"
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
Shout out to @williefitz.bsky.social
November 27, 2025 at 11:51 PM
Shout out to @williefitz.bsky.social
hanky thapsgiving... much to consider here
November 27, 2025 at 5:31 PM
hanky thapsgiving... much to consider here
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
ohhh how the tables have stayed about the same
June 14, 2024 at 8:50 PM
ohhh how the tables have stayed about the same
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
Was not expecting this blatant xenophobia on my tv first thing in the morning...
November 27, 2025 at 1:40 PM
Was not expecting this blatant xenophobia on my tv first thing in the morning...
it gets overshadowed by an all-time homer bit, but marge's "please don't bring home any more old crutches" is unbelievable
November 26, 2025 at 5:29 PM
it gets overshadowed by an all-time homer bit, but marge's "please don't bring home any more old crutches" is unbelievable
this guy would prob not need a spot at that weight but the metaphor of chatgpt saying anodyne bullshit while you struggled, alone, under a heavy bench press *is* pretty spot-on
This is such a bad ad man. It takes so long to see that he has a phone on his knee.
November 26, 2025 at 5:27 PM
this guy would prob not need a spot at that weight but the metaphor of chatgpt saying anodyne bullshit while you struggled, alone, under a heavy bench press *is* pretty spot-on
they named him mozart because he made the most art. simple as
November 26, 2025 at 5:24 PM
they named him mozart because he made the most art. simple as
people were drunk and very emotional and it took 45 minutes and everything was cold by the time we finally ate. that's the sort of weapons-grade oblivious earnestness you could only find in circa-2012 Seattle.
thinking about the time i cooked thanksgiving for 25+ people and right as everything came out (my then-gf and i had worked our asses off to get it out at the same time and somehow pulled it off) someone said, "before we eat, we should go around & say what we're thankful for."
November 25, 2025 at 11:36 PM
people were drunk and very emotional and it took 45 minutes and everything was cold by the time we finally ate. that's the sort of weapons-grade oblivious earnestness you could only find in circa-2012 Seattle.
thinking about the time i cooked thanksgiving for 25+ people and right as everything came out (my then-gf and i had worked our asses off to get it out at the same time and somehow pulled it off) someone said, "before we eat, we should go around & say what we're thankful for."
November 25, 2025 at 11:34 PM
thinking about the time i cooked thanksgiving for 25+ people and right as everything came out (my then-gf and i had worked our asses off to get it out at the same time and somehow pulled it off) someone said, "before we eat, we should go around & say what we're thankful for."
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
The Aubrey-Maturin Saga (18 movies)
If you were a despotic president, what movie would you force Hollywood to make? I want to see Quentin's Star Trek movie or maybe Kill Bill Vol 3.
November 25, 2025 at 6:47 PM
The Aubrey-Maturin Saga (18 movies)
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
One of my favorite things is getting to tell friends who are new to NYC that the subway "stand clear of the closing doors please" voice is a trans woman named Bernie Wagenblast and she's amazing.
November 24, 2025 at 6:19 PM
One of my favorite things is getting to tell friends who are new to NYC that the subway "stand clear of the closing doors please" voice is a trans woman named Bernie Wagenblast and she's amazing.
want to apologize to Secretary Kennedy for implying that he would eat a three-day-old skunk. based on this wording, that juvenile skunk is *alive*; we know he would wait until it had been splatted by a logging truck and then left out for a week before he would consume it. we regret the error.
bobby looking into a trail cam right before he finds and eats a three-day-old skunk
Over many interviews, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. told Michael Scherer about how he plans to remake America’s public-health system. Can he lead the scientific establishment he’s spent much of his life crusading against?
Read more in our new cover story: theatln.tc/q9hXxlbM
Read more in our new cover story: theatln.tc/q9hXxlbM
November 24, 2025 at 6:46 PM
want to apologize to Secretary Kennedy for implying that he would eat a three-day-old skunk. based on this wording, that juvenile skunk is *alive*; we know he would wait until it had been splatted by a logging truck and then left out for a week before he would consume it. we regret the error.
bobby looking into a trail cam right before he finds and eats a three-day-old skunk
Over many interviews, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. told Michael Scherer about how he plans to remake America’s public-health system. Can he lead the scientific establishment he’s spent much of his life crusading against?
Read more in our new cover story: theatln.tc/q9hXxlbM
Read more in our new cover story: theatln.tc/q9hXxlbM
November 24, 2025 at 6:36 PM
bobby looking into a trail cam right before he finds and eats a three-day-old skunk
Oh god, I had no idea. "Dog Heaven" is one of my favorite short stories of all time. Even after reading it dozens of time, the ending still gives me goosebumps.
Also one of my fav opening sentences ever: "Every so often that dead dog dreams me up again." What a huge loss.
Also one of my fav opening sentences ever: "Every so often that dead dog dreams me up again." What a huge loss.
i didn't see more than like 2 or 3 stephanie vaughn memorial posts yesterday which i take as a sign that more of you need to put down whatever book you're reading and pick up a copy of Sweet Talk.
November 19, 2025 at 10:22 PM
Oh god, I had no idea. "Dog Heaven" is one of my favorite short stories of all time. Even after reading it dozens of time, the ending still gives me goosebumps.
Also one of my fav opening sentences ever: "Every so often that dead dog dreams me up again." What a huge loss.
Also one of my fav opening sentences ever: "Every so often that dead dog dreams me up again." What a huge loss.
is that good
"We have a 2000s housing bubble level of financial engineering on top of a 1920s level of private unregulated lending on top of something bigger than a 1990s internet (or 1870s railroad) level of technology and infrastructure build-out." prospect.org/2025/11/19/a...
The AI Bubble Is Bigger Than You Think - The American Prospect
It’s not just OpenAI that looks overhyped. There’s a whole mountain of sketchy financial engineering underneath.
prospect.org
November 19, 2025 at 5:40 PM
is that good
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
Olivia Nuzzi got horny at the part of ET where he’s lying sick in the water
November 18, 2025 at 4:37 AM
Olivia Nuzzi got horny at the part of ET where he’s lying sick in the water
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
losing my mind over youtube's suggested reply for this comment
November 17, 2025 at 3:50 PM
losing my mind over youtube's suggested reply for this comment
gonna start calling Thomas Chatterton Williams 'tommy chatty billy' like he's a rude goat or something. you'd learn more watching the goat headbutt the paddock gate, too
November 13, 2025 at 10:13 PM
gonna start calling Thomas Chatterton Williams 'tommy chatty billy' like he's a rude goat or something. you'd learn more watching the goat headbutt the paddock gate, too
Alex, Al, baby — a spider has *eight* legs, not, twelve or thirteen or whatever you've got here. You rube. you fucking moron
Alexander Calder, Spider, 1939
https://botfrens.com/collections/14377/contents/1136537
https://botfrens.com/collections/14377/contents/1136537
November 13, 2025 at 3:57 PM
Alex, Al, baby — a spider has *eight* legs, not, twelve or thirteen or whatever you've got here. You rube. you fucking moron
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
Very exciting news about Elisa Gabbert's next book forthcoming from @fsgbooks.bsky.social
November 13, 2025 at 3:41 PM
Very exciting news about Elisa Gabbert's next book forthcoming from @fsgbooks.bsky.social
we all know it, but every time I see a new epstein email I'm struck by the fact that he writes like the "i;m thinkin about thos Beans" guy, if that guy was pure evil
November 12, 2025 at 11:51 PM
we all know it, but every time I see a new epstein email I'm struck by the fact that he writes like the "i;m thinkin about thos Beans" guy, if that guy was pure evil
Heartbreaking that future generations won't know the simple pleasure of a "take a penny, eat a penny" dish in every gas station and convenience store. Just another part of the American childhood, gone forever. www.nytimes.com/2025/11/12/b...
The Penny Dies at 232
www.nytimes.com
November 12, 2025 at 8:58 PM
Heartbreaking that future generations won't know the simple pleasure of a "take a penny, eat a penny" dish in every gas station and convenience store. Just another part of the American childhood, gone forever. www.nytimes.com/2025/11/12/b...