Schmeev
@schmeev.bsky.social
Probably cursed, cannot be helped. All pronouns ok, corrections are not chastising.
Pinned
Schmeev
@schmeev.bsky.social
· Nov 20
“god youre so tight” i say, attempting to extract a cartridge from my nes
watching solo for the first time. stormtroopers in a fascist police state doing fascist police state things, families being broken apart, invading people, wreaking havoc in the name of "bringing peace and stability", where have i heard all this stuff...
December 6, 2025 at 6:22 AM
watching solo for the first time. stormtroopers in a fascist police state doing fascist police state things, families being broken apart, invading people, wreaking havoc in the name of "bringing peace and stability", where have i heard all this stuff...
star wars bukkake scene, han shoots first
December 6, 2025 at 5:51 AM
star wars bukkake scene, han shoots first
gotta yell about blood whistle again real quick because i just realized the guy gets the blood whistle from a secret toad house, but he gets there through the secret in the first world fortress, which doesnt lead to a toad house, just a room with a level end chest in it. he couldnt describe 1-3???
December 3, 2025 at 4:25 AM
gotta yell about blood whistle again real quick because i just realized the guy gets the blood whistle from a secret toad house, but he gets there through the secret in the first world fortress, which doesnt lead to a toad house, just a room with a level end chest in it. he couldnt describe 1-3???
November 30, 2025 at 5:09 PM
trying to close my fallen comrades eyes with one sweep of my hand but theyre still a little open so i awkwardly shut them one by one and accidentally poke one and get eyeball juice on my hand
November 29, 2025 at 2:06 AM
trying to close my fallen comrades eyes with one sweep of my hand but theyre still a little open so i awkwardly shut them one by one and accidentally poke one and get eyeball juice on my hand
Reposted by Schmeev
we should start calling countries by the names they give themselves. i dunno what every country calls itself, and some leeway for accent is reasonable, but i think its time to make it a thing
November 21, 2025 at 2:59 PM
we should start calling countries by the names they give themselves. i dunno what every country calls itself, and some leeway for accent is reasonable, but i think its time to make it a thing
blood whistle is still a big fave in bad creepypasta, and i kinda wonder if the writer had something in mind that doesnt come through in the writing. it feels like he was intending something more sinister than "I CANT BELIEVE THEY TORTURED MARIO, I CANT TAKE IT"
November 20, 2025 at 6:54 PM
blood whistle is still a big fave in bad creepypasta, and i kinda wonder if the writer had something in mind that doesnt come through in the writing. it feels like he was intending something more sinister than "I CANT BELIEVE THEY TORTURED MARIO, I CANT TAKE IT"
no other animal on the planet knows what murder is either. or dietary supplements. ps5. carpet. cassette player. lobster bisque. magic the gathering. smoke alarm. damn, lotta stuff out there that relies on a shared understanding/cultural context to serve its purpose
Every fucking thing he says flashes the "charlie brown had hoes" tweet into my brain. No it's not, that isn't true.
November 20, 2025 at 3:51 PM
no other animal on the planet knows what murder is either. or dietary supplements. ps5. carpet. cassette player. lobster bisque. magic the gathering. smoke alarm. damn, lotta stuff out there that relies on a shared understanding/cultural context to serve its purpose
king arthur is supposed to be all wise and shit but after that knight comes all jacked up from the sable knight his lil page guy is like "king, grant me a boon" and hes just like "yeah, anything, granted" LIKE WAIT TO HEAR WHAT IT IS FIRST MAN CMON THE KID GETTIN BEAT DOWN IS YOUR FAULT
November 20, 2025 at 4:18 AM
king arthur is supposed to be all wise and shit but after that knight comes all jacked up from the sable knight his lil page guy is like "king, grant me a boon" and hes just like "yeah, anything, granted" LIKE WAIT TO HEAR WHAT IT IS FIRST MAN CMON THE KID GETTIN BEAT DOWN IS YOUR FAULT
been listening to the dragnet radio show and its so funny hearing this "lapd hero cop stops bad drug men!" story with regular breaks to go "SMOKE FATIMA CIGARETTES, THE BEST CIGS. WE GOT SO MANY LOYAL CUSTOMERS. WONDER WHY"
but who knew cigarettes were bad back then, besides the whole damn industry
but who knew cigarettes were bad back then, besides the whole damn industry
November 19, 2025 at 5:26 AM
been listening to the dragnet radio show and its so funny hearing this "lapd hero cop stops bad drug men!" story with regular breaks to go "SMOKE FATIMA CIGARETTES, THE BEST CIGS. WE GOT SO MANY LOYAL CUSTOMERS. WONDER WHY"
but who knew cigarettes were bad back then, besides the whole damn industry
but who knew cigarettes were bad back then, besides the whole damn industry
at home
drawing pictures
of monster cocks
with him on top
drawing pictures
of monster cocks
with him on top
November 18, 2025 at 6:24 PM
at home
drawing pictures
of monster cocks
with him on top
drawing pictures
of monster cocks
with him on top
Reposted by Schmeev
You can love someone you love even if you don't love yourself🏳️⚧️
But if you love yourself, you can love both yourself and the person you love. Your love becomes twofold.
So take care of yourself.
Your soul is beautiful.
But if you love yourself, you can love both yourself and the person you love. Your love becomes twofold.
So take care of yourself.
Your soul is beautiful.
November 18, 2025 at 2:33 PM
You can love someone you love even if you don't love yourself🏳️⚧️
But if you love yourself, you can love both yourself and the person you love. Your love becomes twofold.
So take care of yourself.
Your soul is beautiful.
But if you love yourself, you can love both yourself and the person you love. Your love becomes twofold.
So take care of yourself.
Your soul is beautiful.
remembering that "fired for truth" dipshit saying "we need a left wing AND right wing, birds cant fly with just one wing!" like the most baby brained shit. we aint a bird, bitch
"PEDAL TO THE METAL BABY"
"theres a floormat there, not metal. make sure you check your mirrors and use your signals"
"PEDAL TO THE METAL BABY"
"theres a floormat there, not metal. make sure you check your mirrors and use your signals"
November 17, 2025 at 4:34 AM
remembering that "fired for truth" dipshit saying "we need a left wing AND right wing, birds cant fly with just one wing!" like the most baby brained shit. we aint a bird, bitch
"PEDAL TO THE METAL BABY"
"theres a floormat there, not metal. make sure you check your mirrors and use your signals"
"PEDAL TO THE METAL BABY"
"theres a floormat there, not metal. make sure you check your mirrors and use your signals"
misery business but its about finally getting the battletoads strategy guide
woah, i never beat big blag...but i got him where i want him now
woah, i never beat big blag...but i got him where i want him now
November 16, 2025 at 5:49 PM
misery business but its about finally getting the battletoads strategy guide
woah, i never beat big blag...but i got him where i want him now
woah, i never beat big blag...but i got him where i want him now
Reposted by Schmeev
cant tell if the boondocks version of ann coulter is better than the real one or not. like, a common metric is if they should and do know better, theyre worse, but i still kinda feel like the cynical grifter is preferable to the rabid freak we actually have
November 14, 2025 at 6:03 PM
cant tell if the boondocks version of ann coulter is better than the real one or not. like, a common metric is if they should and do know better, theyre worse, but i still kinda feel like the cynical grifter is preferable to the rabid freak we actually have
Reposted by Schmeev
more than "you should play bad games because a maligned game might be good" i would prefer if the positive contrarian dogma was "you should play games that genuinely interest you regardless of what other people think" because holy shit the former leads to a lot of turning your misery into Content
November 9, 2025 at 4:48 PM
more than "you should play bad games because a maligned game might be good" i would prefer if the positive contrarian dogma was "you should play games that genuinely interest you regardless of what other people think" because holy shit the former leads to a lot of turning your misery into Content
this guy finished the policenauts puzzle with half his screen covered
I think this bag is fake.
Hermes's flagship products are handsewn using a saddle stitch. A worker marks the leather using an awl and then threads two needles through from both sides.
This results in a tight stitch with no holes between the stitches. The holes here suggest the bag was machine sewn.
Hermes's flagship products are handsewn using a saddle stitch. A worker marks the leather using an awl and then threads two needles through from both sides.
This results in a tight stitch with no holes between the stitches. The holes here suggest the bag was machine sewn.
November 8, 2025 at 7:56 AM
this guy finished the policenauts puzzle with half his screen covered
"nooo i need to know what parts he was lying about, politicians shouldnt have convictioooooons why would he run on things he actually wants to dooooo???"
kevin continues to suck shit forever
kevin continues to suck shit forever
Canadian multimillionaire and Shark Tank guy Kevin O'Leary went on TV to say he's upset Zohran won't talk to him: "I and others who invest in real estate have tried to get a meeting to figure out what's rhetoric and what's policy. So far for me it's been crickets."
November 7, 2025 at 4:02 PM
"nooo i need to know what parts he was lying about, politicians shouldnt have convictioooooons why would he run on things he actually wants to dooooo???"
kevin continues to suck shit forever
kevin continues to suck shit forever
trying to play master of magic on easy and any time i engage in combat i just get fuckin owned and sit here confused about how this game even works
like i get the civ style gameplay part but its fuckin RUTHLESS in battles, the natural spawning nearby enemies at turn 1 are one shotting everything
like i get the civ style gameplay part but its fuckin RUTHLESS in battles, the natural spawning nearby enemies at turn 1 are one shotting everything
November 5, 2025 at 10:45 PM
trying to play master of magic on easy and any time i engage in combat i just get fuckin owned and sit here confused about how this game even works
like i get the civ style gameplay part but its fuckin RUTHLESS in battles, the natural spawning nearby enemies at turn 1 are one shotting everything
like i get the civ style gameplay part but its fuckin RUTHLESS in battles, the natural spawning nearby enemies at turn 1 are one shotting everything
Reposted by Schmeev
Dick is gone, Bush remains.
November 4, 2025 at 1:22 PM
Dick is gone, Bush remains.
Reposted by Schmeev
Reposted by Schmeev
it’s Halloween time
October 30, 2025 at 8:03 PM
it’s Halloween time
Reposted by Schmeev
