Chris Pariso
@chrispariso.bsky.social
Analyst/investigator/data nerd. Also, I blacksmith, train/teach various martial arts, and bake stuff.
Tweets/opinions are my own. He/him.
Tweets/opinions are my own. He/him.
Yep!
Hegseth tweeted a Franklin meme, the Franklin owners responded in an understandably pissed off way, and the administration doubled by using Franklin as much as possible.
So, pettiness is what it boils down to.
Hegseth tweeted a Franklin meme, the Franklin owners responded in an understandably pissed off way, and the administration doubled by using Franklin as much as possible.
So, pettiness is what it boils down to.
Anyone have a theory on the administration's sudden obsession with Franklin the turtle?
December 8, 2025 at 1:19 AM
Yep!
Hegseth tweeted a Franklin meme, the Franklin owners responded in an understandably pissed off way, and the administration doubled by using Franklin as much as possible.
So, pettiness is what it boils down to.
Hegseth tweeted a Franklin meme, the Franklin owners responded in an understandably pissed off way, and the administration doubled by using Franklin as much as possible.
So, pettiness is what it boils down to.
She's running.
Put everything she says and does now in that context, and it makes perfect sense.
Put everything she says and does now in that context, and it makes perfect sense.
Marjorie Taylor Greene: "Affordability is a real issue."
Q: "The president say it's not. He says it's a hoax, affordability."
Marjorie Taylor Greene: "It's one of the top issue. Not only in my district. It is across the country."
Q: "The president say it's not. He says it's a hoax, affordability."
Marjorie Taylor Greene: "It's one of the top issue. Not only in my district. It is across the country."
December 8, 2025 at 1:01 AM
She's running.
Put everything she says and does now in that context, and it makes perfect sense.
Put everything she says and does now in that context, and it makes perfect sense.
Movie you’ve watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Stars (Wars nor Trek), LOTR, or Marvel, Disney Animated or Pixar.
December 8, 2025 at 12:01 AM
Movie you’ve watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Stars (Wars nor Trek), LOTR, or Marvel, Disney Animated or Pixar.
Really good thread on spotting signs that a video is AI slop:
Especially these obviously pure-bred dogs. The kid with the headphones at the end triggered the radar hardest for me, but the best way is paying attention to the background, because no one is focused there. I went back and found a few things. The chair legs are pretty good, but check these out:
December 7, 2025 at 1:54 PM
Really good thread on spotting signs that a video is AI slop:
Reposted by Chris Pariso
Are you on generic Vyvanse? There was a nationwide recall in the fall that a lot of people missed because they put out the news generally but didn’t tell people who were on it directly.
Check your lot numbers here: www.pharmacy.ca.gov/about/recall...
Check your lot numbers here: www.pharmacy.ca.gov/about/recall...
December 7, 2025 at 1:41 PM
Are you on generic Vyvanse? There was a nationwide recall in the fall that a lot of people missed because they put out the news generally but didn’t tell people who were on it directly.
Check your lot numbers here: www.pharmacy.ca.gov/about/recall...
Check your lot numbers here: www.pharmacy.ca.gov/about/recall...
Reposted by Chris Pariso
THE BOAT WAS HEADED TO SURINAME, NOT THE US, BECAUSE OF COURSE IT WAS.
On left:
President Trump Statement Sept. 2, 2025:
"The strike occurred while the terrorists were at sea in international waters transporting illegal narcotics, heading to the United States."
On right:
(Under penalty of law) military leaders told Congress headed to Suriname.
President Trump Statement Sept. 2, 2025:
"The strike occurred while the terrorists were at sea in international waters transporting illegal narcotics, heading to the United States."
On right:
(Under penalty of law) military leaders told Congress headed to Suriname.
December 5, 2025 at 10:44 PM
THE BOAT WAS HEADED TO SURINAME, NOT THE US, BECAUSE OF COURSE IT WAS.
Long
Live
The king
Live
The king
"Say it!"
"No!"
"Say it, Hans."
"My name's not Hans!"
"I WILL drop you."
“Fine, okay, you win!”
“I need to hear you say it.”
"Die Hard is a Christmas movie!"
"No!"
"Say it, Hans."
"My name's not Hans!"
"I WILL drop you."
“Fine, okay, you win!”
“I need to hear you say it.”
"Die Hard is a Christmas movie!"
December 7, 2025 at 12:37 AM
Long
Live
The king
Live
The king
I uhh.. I'm not moving any time soon.
December 7, 2025 at 12:18 AM
I uhh.. I'm not moving any time soon.
What the dystopian cyberpunk fuck is this?
"Soon, CNN will run live odds on world events where its viewers can gamble on them in real time on their smartphones."
CNN Partners With a Gambling App That Lets You Wager on Starvation in Gaza
The app company’s two biggest investors are also heavily invested in the Israeli military.
truthout.org
December 6, 2025 at 12:33 AM
What the dystopian cyberpunk fuck is this?
Just imagine how miserable someone has to be in life to make a decision this petty.
I'd say we're a nation run by children, but children have more basic human respect than this.
I'd say we're a nation run by children, but children have more basic human respect than this.
Admiral Rachel Levine was the first transgender person to be confirmed by the Senate to serve in the federal government. Her official portrait at HHS headquarters has been altered. n.pr/48HypvT
HHS changed the name of transgender health leader on her official portrait
Admiral Rachel Levine was the first transgender person to be confirmed by the Senate to serve in the federal government. Her official portrait at HHS headquarters has been altered.
n.pr
December 5, 2025 at 11:44 PM
Just imagine how miserable someone has to be in life to make a decision this petty.
I'd say we're a nation run by children, but children have more basic human respect than this.
I'd say we're a nation run by children, but children have more basic human respect than this.
Absolutely wild times when administration officials can publicly and proudly announce their crimes against humanity in real time with zero immediate repercussions.
Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth announces another boat strike in response to a request/wish from Turning Point USA’s Andrew Kolvet.
December 5, 2025 at 1:57 AM
Absolutely wild times when administration officials can publicly and proudly announce their crimes against humanity in real time with zero immediate repercussions.
They knew in the first 30 seconds they were going to launch a second strike.
The following 40+ minutes were just spent hashing out the justification.
The following 40+ minutes were just spent hashing out the justification.
December 5, 2025 at 1:32 AM
They knew in the first 30 seconds they were going to launch a second strike.
The following 40+ minutes were just spent hashing out the justification.
The following 40+ minutes were just spent hashing out the justification.
Honest question: if you can real-time track a suspected narco boat with enough precision for an airstrike, you could also follow it to its destination, yeah?
Where, if the same level of surveillance continued, you could uncover the broader distribution network.
Wouldn't that be better overall?
Where, if the same level of surveillance continued, you could uncover the broader distribution network.
Wouldn't that be better overall?
The US military carried out a strike on a suspected drug boat in the Eastern Pacific, killing four people on board, according to a social media post from US Southern Command. https://cnn.it/4av0Z63
December 5, 2025 at 1:22 AM
Honest question: if you can real-time track a suspected narco boat with enough precision for an airstrike, you could also follow it to its destination, yeah?
Where, if the same level of surveillance continued, you could uncover the broader distribution network.
Wouldn't that be better overall?
Where, if the same level of surveillance continued, you could uncover the broader distribution network.
Wouldn't that be better overall?
They're so close to understanding a fundamental maga/conservative belief about woman.
So close, and yet...
So close, and yet...
Shocking to see Stefanik, Greene, and Mace figure out they're disposable to MAGA. It's almost as if they lent their being to a movement that doesn't even recognize their humanity.
Some House Republican women are in open revolt against Speaker Mike Johnson
Female lawmakers in the House GOP conference have had some high-profile splits with leadership in recent weeks. Some are heading for the exits.
www.nbcnews.com
December 4, 2025 at 11:32 AM
They're so close to understanding a fundamental maga/conservative belief about woman.
So close, and yet...
So close, and yet...
Reposted by Chris Pariso
this clip encapsulates so much of what has been wrong about MSM Trump coverage for the past decade -- treating Trump's lies and bigotry as a valid "side" of a debate instead of calling it out, because calling it out makes it seem as though you're biased
MSNBC reporter presents Trump's shameful racism towards Somalis as merely "a different view"
December 3, 2025 at 9:55 PM
this clip encapsulates so much of what has been wrong about MSM Trump coverage for the past decade -- treating Trump's lies and bigotry as a valid "side" of a debate instead of calling it out, because calling it out makes it seem as though you're biased
Just naked, unabashed racism from the president, and every vapidly smiling sycophant surrounding him.
Trump: "It’s a hellhole right now. And those Somalians should be out of here. They've destroyed our country. And all they do is complain, complain, complain. You have her. She’s always talking about the Constitution provides me with – go back to your own country and figure out your constitution."
December 4, 2025 at 1:26 AM
Just naked, unabashed racism from the president, and every vapidly smiling sycophant surrounding him.
This makes a lot more sense when you picture staffers desperately trying to explain basic government functions to Trump like he's five, and him taking everything they say 100% literally.
Trump: "They're finding money in our country now that they never knew existed. The other day -- $30b. Where did it come from? I said, 'Why don't you check the tariffs shelf?' They said, 'Sir, that tariff hasn't started yet.' I said, 'No, it started 2 months ago.' They call back- 'sir, you're right'"
December 4, 2025 at 12:52 AM
This makes a lot more sense when you picture staffers desperately trying to explain basic government functions to Trump like he's five, and him taking everything they say 100% literally.
Who ICE claims to target: rapists, murders, drug dealers.
Who ICE actually targets:
Who ICE actually targets:
Guzmán, an immigrant from Mexico, had a pending petition for asylum and a pending application for a visa for victims of crime. That didn't stop ICE from separating her from her 15-day-old infant in NICU. 19thnews.org/2025/12/post... via @19thnews.org
Her baby was in the NICU. She was in ICE detention.
Before Trump took office, postpartum immigrants were rarely detained by ICE. Nayra Guzmán was detained while her 15-day-old baby was in the NICU.
19thnews.org
December 3, 2025 at 1:37 AM
Who ICE claims to target: rapists, murders, drug dealers.
Who ICE actually targets:
Who ICE actually targets:
Reposted by Chris Pariso
1. This is not what fog of war means.
2. There is no war
3. He's trying to distance himself from murders he had direct responsibility over
4. All I can think of when I hear this phrase now is Elon Musk complaining that he hates chess because it has no fog of war.
2. There is no war
3. He's trying to distance himself from murders he had direct responsibility over
4. All I can think of when I hear this phrase now is Elon Musk complaining that he hates chess because it has no fog of war.
Q: So you didn't see any survivors after that first strike?
HEGSETH: I did not personally see survivors. The thing was on fire. This is called the fog of war. This is what you in the press don't understand. You sit in your air conditioned offices and plant fake stories in the Washington Post
HEGSETH: I did not personally see survivors. The thing was on fire. This is called the fog of war. This is what you in the press don't understand. You sit in your air conditioned offices and plant fake stories in the Washington Post
December 2, 2025 at 8:20 PM
1. This is not what fog of war means.
2. There is no war
3. He's trying to distance himself from murders he had direct responsibility over
4. All I can think of when I hear this phrase now is Elon Musk complaining that he hates chess because it has no fog of war.
2. There is no war
3. He's trying to distance himself from murders he had direct responsibility over
4. All I can think of when I hear this phrase now is Elon Musk complaining that he hates chess because it has no fog of war.
Fuckin legend.
Raccoon gets drunk at a Virginia liquor store and passes out in bathroom
Raccoon gets drunk at Ashland ABC store and passes out in bathroom
Talk about a trashed panda.
www.axios.com
December 2, 2025 at 10:49 PM
Fuckin legend.
Hegseth didn't order a 'war crime', because there has been no declaration of war.
Hegseth ordered extrajudicial killings.
Pedantic? Maybe. But no less important regardless.
Hegseth ordered extrajudicial killings.
Pedantic? Maybe. But no less important regardless.
For some reason Democratic leaders seem to prefer telling voters what they won’t be able to do, rather than what they’d like to do.
If Hegseth ordered a war crime and lied about it, shouldn’t Ds try for impeachment? Put Rs on the spot. They might get a few defections.
www.axios.com/2025/12/01/j...
If Hegseth ordered a war crime and lied about it, shouldn’t Ds try for impeachment? Put Rs on the spot. They might get a few defections.
www.axios.com/2025/12/01/j...
Jeffries says not to expect Democrats to pursue Hegseth impeachment over boat strikes
"Republicans will never allow articles of impeachment to be brought to the floor," he said.
www.axios.com
December 2, 2025 at 2:14 AM
Hegseth didn't order a 'war crime', because there has been no declaration of war.
Hegseth ordered extrajudicial killings.
Pedantic? Maybe. But no less important regardless.
Hegseth ordered extrajudicial killings.
Pedantic? Maybe. But no less important regardless.
Reposted by Chris Pariso
This is actually quite brilliant, up to and including the final sentence 🔥
December 1, 2025 at 11:09 AM
This is actually quite brilliant, up to and including the final sentence 🔥
All things being equal, just imagine getting an MRI and having no idea why.
Reporter: Governor Walz called for the release of your MRI results
Trump: They were perfect like my phone call where I got impeached.
Reporter: Can you tell us what they were looking at?
Trump: I have no idea. It was just an MRI. It wasn’t the brain because I took a cognitive test and aced it.
Trump: They were perfect like my phone call where I got impeached.
Reporter: Can you tell us what they were looking at?
Trump: I have no idea. It was just an MRI. It wasn’t the brain because I took a cognitive test and aced it.
December 1, 2025 at 12:42 AM
All things being equal, just imagine getting an MRI and having no idea why.