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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 3h

a cartoon character holding a toothbrush and saying i glued my head to my shoulder

ALT: a cartoon character holding a toothbrush and saying i glued my head to my shoulder

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 4h

Must...not...drop...the...baton.

a man in a blue shirt and khaki shorts is holding a wooden stick in front of a house .

ALT: a man in a blue shirt and khaki shorts is holding a wooden stick in front of a house .

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 5h

Thank you for the kind intro, Paul, and the great prompt words.

a man in a black tank top and shorts is doing a leg stretch

ALT: a man in a black tank top and shorts is doing a leg stretch

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 5h

'Would you like economy, standard, #deluxe, super deluxe, or elite, Sir?'
'Economy.'
'Economy means no thrills, purely basic.'
'It's only a 2 hour flight.'
'That's £300. And would you like to upgrade your seat to being inside the aircraft, Sir, for an extra £800?'
'What?'
#vss365

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 12h

a car is driving down a snowy road in front of a house

ALT: a car is driving down a snowy road in front of a house

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 12h

You've been a brilliant host, Paul. I've thoroughly enjoyed the musical adventure you've taken us on.
I look forward to breaking the record as worst #vss365 host ever, a record previously held by me 3 years ago

a cartoon bunny says may the chaos commence in front of fire

ALT: a cartoon bunny says may the chaos commence in front of fire

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 1d

'Here's the Jeeves MkI Robo-Butler. It comes with #undertones of sarcasm.'
'Far too expensive.'
'Ok. We do have the Alfred "Michael Caine" 200. I'll just demonstrate.'
'You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off.'
'Hmm. It appears to be stuck in Italian Job mode.'
#vss365

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 2d

Thank you for sharing, Mo.

a woman with her hair blowing in the wind says " you 're welcome "

ALT: a woman with her hair blowing in the wind says " you 're welcome "

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 2d

An incredible aircraft. Made of wood.

a black and white photo of a plane with the letters eg on the side

ALT: a black and white photo of a plane with the letters eg on the side

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 2d

It was a typo, Sir.
Thank you for pointing it out.
But I'm afraid I will have to challenge you to duel now. Our weapons of choice. Allied aircraft from 1939 to 1942, Sir.
😁

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 2d

a man in a suit and tie is smiling with his eyes closed

ALT: a man in a suit and tie is smiling with his eyes closed

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 2d

'This is unsufferable. I challenge you to a duel.'
'I accept, Sir. Your weapon of choice?'
'Deadly fish, Sir.'
'I choose #Piranha fish.'
'Then I shall choose, Scorpion fish.'
'Tomorrow at dawn?'
'Indeed, Sir.'
'Good day, Sir.'
'Good day.'
#vss365

Readers: What the fuck was that?

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 3d

Thank you, Maria 😁😁

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 3d

a man in a blue sweater is standing next to a bottle of beer .

ALT: a man in a blue sweater is standing next to a bottle of beer .

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 3d

You're most welcome, Mo 😁

a man in a suit and tie is standing in front of a door with a sign on it that says meeting in progress

ALT: a man in a suit and tie is standing in front of a door with a sign on it that says meeting in progress

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 3d

Katie was always losing things. She lost her #raincoat at the park whilst playing football. She lost her dinner money on the school bus.
But she never expected to lose her shadow. She'd had it yesterday. It had followed her all around the playground.
But now it was gone.
#vss365

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 3d

😂😂

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 4d

'I'm here to see a band tonight? The #Verve?'
'Yeah. They're on now. Are you here to sign them?'
'If they fit the criteria. I've just signed Oasis and The Stone Roses so let's see. Bandy legged swagger. Nasally Manc vocals. Talented but also very annoying. They're in.'
#vss365

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 5d

a man in a wig says well lucky lucky us in a room

ALT: a man in a wig says well lucky lucky us in a room

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 5d

It's such a classic show, and like you say, there were so many quotable lines you could say the next day at school or work 🤣

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 5d

'Oh God no. The man's a complete #libertine, a cad and a bounder. He'll have half the female staff pregnant within a month, the other half within 2 months, and half the male staff will get a "little curious" too. God. Show him in.'
'Lord Flashheart, m' Lord.'
'Woof woof.'
#vss365

a man in a wig says i 've got a plan to a woman

ALT: a man in a wig says i 've got a plan to a woman

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 5d

Thank you, Maria.

a little girl wearing a leopard print shirt is making a face

ALT: a little girl wearing a leopard print shirt is making a face

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 6d

Thank you Beth 😁😁

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 6d

In AD 79, Jeffus Twattus began his journey to create the first ever travel guide.
It would be the greatest book the world had ever seen.
His first stop.
Pompei.
As Mount Vesuvius spewed volcanic #ash into the air, he muttered his final words.
"Oh, for fuckus saykius."
#vss365

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Steve - Teller of Tall Tales 🇺🇦 @bofferson.bsky.social · 6d

Thank you DeRicki

a little girl wearing a leopard print shirt is making a face

ALT: a little girl wearing a leopard print shirt is making a face

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