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Bluesmobile

@bluesmobile.bsky.social

17K followers 540 following 10K posts

Cop motor, cop tires, cop suspension, cop shocks. Hates Illinois Nazis. Don’t try to argue with me. I am a CAR for chrissakes, and my 8-track/onboard SCMOD computer is state-of-the-art in 1980.

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Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · Nov 11

A lot of people are saying that my 44-year nitrous oxide addiction and multiple marriages and divorces to Cheryl have left me no choice but to become a lowly Production Assistant to Mr. Liam NissanTM.

But they are only 99% right.

I truly hate Illinois Nazis as much as Liam NissanTM does.

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Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 1h

Lots of space in this mall.

Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 1h

Not you personally of course.

I’ll bet that you are very kind, very sweet, very smart and you watch The Blues Brothers on Netflix.

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Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 1h

Because hate makes you stupid.

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Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 1h

Hop in Kay.

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Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 1h

For some reason when George Soros pays us all the protest this weekend, he demands that we all have blue hair.

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Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 16h

There’s nothing better than freshly picked rock juice.

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Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 16h

“I already killed more Americans than Hitler.”
- King Dementia Don Fitzputin

Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 16h

“No one is more stoopit than me is.”
- King Dementia Don Fitzputin

Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 16h

Git it on!

Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 17h

Yeah, I think my work is done here.

Come Mr. Tallyman. Tally me bananas.

Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 18h

“Betelgeuse

Betelgeuse

Penis juice.”

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Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 18h

“We can’t get fooled again.”

Dubya seems like a fucken GENIUS compared to King Dementia Don Fitzputin.

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Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 18h

If it makes you feel any better, Lauren Hoebert has an exact replica in her pants.

#HandyGranny

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Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 18h

Santa Claus = “Fool me once, shame on YOU.”

The Bible = “Fool me twice, shame on ME.”

MAGA = “Fool me OVER and OVER again. I am WAY too racist to realize how stupid I am.”

donald trump is giving a speech in front of american flags and saying i love the poorly educated

ALT: donald trump is giving a speech in front of american flags and saying i love the poorly educated

media.tenor.com

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Bluesmobile @bluesmobile.bsky.social · 18h

But my 440 is full of nothing BUT lit matches.