Author | Lightnews

Cassandrastein

@amynewsmith.bsky.social

790 followers 1.4K following 1.5K posts

Liker of big words and organized systems. Extremely Jewish. Voted most likely to fall down a flight of stairs. I stan gardens and eliminating plastic. No longer on a mission to follow all Jews on Here because some of ya’ll aren’t even worth a hate-follow

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Reposted by Cassandrastein

Norm Charlatan @normcharlatan.bsky.social · 1d

So the media CAN use the active voice when the police kill a living being.

Ryan Marino, MD @ryanmarino.bsky.social · 1d

Due process really no longer exists in this country

Law enforcement kills several monkeys after truck hauling them overturns in Mississippi

According to authorities, the Rhesus monkeys were on their way to a testing facility in Florida after being at Tulane University.

www.wtok.com

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Reposted by Cassandrastein

Josh Chafetz @joshchafetz.bsky.social · 1d

“I didn‘t intentionally quote Hitler; I just unintentionally said things that are almost verbatim what he said” is … maybe not the defense you think it Is?

Jenny Cohn @jennycohn.bsky.social · 1d

4/ “The Salient’s student leadership stood by the piece after its publication. In a statement to The Crimson this month, Rodgers wrote that the article’s author and editors did not intentionally quote Hitler and did not recognize the resemblance to the speech.”

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Reposted by Cassandrastein

Jaime N. Christley @rohmersimpson.bsky.social · 2d

CHOTINER: So we ordered shrimp fried rice
ME: Isaac, are you t-
CHOTINER: Let me finish.
ME: Are you telling me a--
CHOTINER (clumsily undoing a wired lavalier microphone attached to his collar): THAT'S FUCKING IT, I'M DONE HERE

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Reposted by Cassandrastein

Gef the Toking Mongoose @geftokingmongoose.bsky.social · May 3

Tastee Freez Employee 1: Are those two weird fuckers who suck on the chili dogs back out there

Tastee Freez Employee 2:*sighs* yeah

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Cassandrastein @amynewsmith.bsky.social · 2d

Correlate: Nobody is going to believe you got chlamydia from a koala

Harlem Toots @chadstanton.blacksky.app · 2d

No one is going to buy you got herpes in a monkey attack. They’re or going to buy it.

Tyler King @tyleraking.com · 2d

A truckload of rhesus monkeys from Tulane university escaped after a crash. The university warned they’re highly aggressive toward humans and infected with hepatitis C, herpes, and COVID.

Reposted by Cassandrastein

Fascism Heckler @fascismheckler.bsky.social · 2d

The litmus test for who to listen to will always be "what are your thoughts on the war in Ukraine" and if the answer isn't Slava Ukraini, they're crazy

Mira of Kyiv 🇺🇦 @reshetz.bsky.social · 2d

Generational fucking quote

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Cassandrastein @amynewsmith.bsky.social · 4d

If this were kosher I would buy it for my kid who is allergic to sesame. But no way in hell would I eat it.

Reposted by Cassandrastein

Radley Balko @radleybalko.bsky.social · 4d

Trying to think if there’s anything this administration could do that publications like TFP wouldn’t treat this way.

Once you’re creating Overton space for extrajudicial executions, I’m not sure there’s much left.

Anthony Michael Kreis @anthonymkreis.bsky.social · 4d

close the law schools

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Cassandrastein @amynewsmith.bsky.social · 4d

1 uncle was a crop duster; he got a little shorter after each of his 4 crashes. open casket funeral; they used his flying helmet to hide the fact that the back of his skull was gone after he ate his gun.
If you’ve never seen cropdusting planes fly the missing man formation over a funeral…

Kaitlin Ruiz @kaitlinruiz.bsky.social · Aug 30

I don't need the lore behind your favorite posters... tell me about your uncles

Cassandrastein @amynewsmith.bsky.social · 4d

He didn’t raise his voice. And everyone walked away okay (except the two main combatants who had already hurt each other pretty badly when we happened upon the action)

Cassandrastein @amynewsmith.bsky.social · 4d

I watched my CHPD uncle break up a gang fight in a mall. He was wearing shorts and a Hawaiian shirt. No weapon. He made eye contact with another guy who had walked over and two seconds later they were back to back, each one holding one of the main combatants. Neither was armed.

Kaitlin Ruiz @kaitlinruiz.bsky.social · Aug 30

I don't need the lore behind your favorite posters... tell me about your uncles

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Cassandrastein @amynewsmith.bsky.social · 4d

the auto insurance fraud division when the Russian mafia was using it as a cash cow. The most reliable human being I know.

Cassandrastein @amynewsmith.bsky.social · 4d

My favorite uncle ran away from home at 16 because by grandfather was not a good good guy /understatement. He joined the Air Force. Then the California Highway Patrol. Retired as the head of CHP Southern District. Unretired to go back to work for California׳s Insurance Commissioner heading up

Kaitlin Ruiz @kaitlinruiz.bsky.social · Aug 30

I don't need the lore behind your favorite posters... tell me about your uncles

Cassandrastein @amynewsmith.bsky.social · 4d

Was expanding into the Midwest when he retired. Got bored being retired and built a company that sold for around $3m when he died (massive stroke). Incredible dad, amazing husband. Just a fabulous guy.

Cassandrastein @amynewsmith.bsky.social · 4d

One of my uncles got drafted to Vietnam straight out of high school. Came back and got a job at a shoe store. Wound up a top regional sales manager for a shoe company. Parlayed that into a management position at a two-store shoe store biz he thought had potential. It had stores across the South and

Kaitlin Ruiz @kaitlinruiz.bsky.social · Aug 30

I don't need the lore behind your favorite posters... tell me about your uncles

Cassandrastein @amynewsmith.bsky.social · 4d

Mazal tov!

Cassandrastein @amynewsmith.bsky.social · 5d

Art

Rene Vielman @renevq.bsky.social · 9d

Hermann Meyer (neé Göring) going “Haha fuck yeah!!! Yes!!” on the left as Germany was sowing, and going “Well this fucking sucks. What the fuck.” on the right as Germany was reaping.

Cassandrastein @amynewsmith.bsky.social · 5d

It’s a standard legal term, I think. Not just for royals. I’ve seen it in wills.

Reposted by Cassandrastein

H R Pickens @hrpickens.bsky.social · 9d

"The supreme crisis over the Bible was that there existed no apparent biblical resolution to the crisis...it was left to those consummate theologians, the Reverend Doctors Ulysses S. Grant and William Tecumseh Sherman, to decide what in fact the Bible actually meant." - Mark Noll