T I M E S C A N N E R
@timescanner.bsky.social
TRAPPED IN A GEM OUTSIDE OF TIME
Reposted by T I M E S C A N N E R
idea: kuleshov tarot. every card is a black-and-white picture of a man staring at you. each card has an unique back design, but there is no indication of *which* card it is beyond this
November 24, 2025 at 8:56 PM
idea: kuleshov tarot. every card is a black-and-white picture of a man staring at you. each card has an unique back design, but there is no indication of *which* card it is beyond this
Wild that I now hold a YouTuber who makes videos about theme parks in the same esteem I held Errol Morris 20 years ago. @defunctland.bsky.social might be one of my favorite filmmakers?
Disney's Living Characters: A Broken Promise
YouTube video by Defunctland
youtu.be
November 24, 2025 at 8:28 PM
Wild that I now hold a YouTuber who makes videos about theme parks in the same esteem I held Errol Morris 20 years ago. @defunctland.bsky.social might be one of my favorite filmmakers?
NUCLEAR EVER AFTER
November 22, 2025 at 4:58 PM
NUCLEAR EVER AFTER
FUCK TOM NOOK. DOWN WITH ZOOLIGARCHS
November 21, 2025 at 5:34 PM
FUCK TOM NOOK. DOWN WITH ZOOLIGARCHS
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Agreed. Metroid is about solitude. The fantasy of having an entire alien planet all to yourself. It’s for people who find face-chomping jellyfish preferable to having to talk to another human.
Lol, what the actual fuck are they thinking? Who plays a Metroid game to have talkative NPC companions?
I play Metroid games to get away from talkative wankers in my real life.
I play Metroid games to get away from talkative wankers in my real life.
November 14, 2025 at 7:06 PM
Agreed. Metroid is about solitude. The fantasy of having an entire alien planet all to yourself. It’s for people who find face-chomping jellyfish preferable to having to talk to another human.
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A sequel to Ferris Bueller's Day Off that takes place 40 years later. Ferris is pushing 60 and looking back on his life, full of bad decisions, schemes gone wrong, and failure. He breaks the 4th wall to directly tell the audience that if God exists, we're the butt of his cruelest joke.
November 14, 2025 at 3:08 PM
A sequel to Ferris Bueller's Day Off that takes place 40 years later. Ferris is pushing 60 and looking back on his life, full of bad decisions, schemes gone wrong, and failure. He breaks the 4th wall to directly tell the audience that if God exists, we're the butt of his cruelest joke.
a modern retelling of The Hunchback of Notre Dame called “Gotta Hunch.”
November 14, 2025 at 2:09 PM
a modern retelling of The Hunchback of Notre Dame called “Gotta Hunch.”
Pitch. The reboot of James Bond takes place in an alternate timeline where Bond accepted Blofeld’s offer to spare his life in exchange for “a delicatessen…in stainless steel.” Bond slices the roast beef thin. Many layers. He carefully spreads condiments all the way to the crust.
November 11, 2025 at 3:39 PM
Pitch. The reboot of James Bond takes place in an alternate timeline where Bond accepted Blofeld’s offer to spare his life in exchange for “a delicatessen…in stainless steel.” Bond slices the roast beef thin. Many layers. He carefully spreads condiments all the way to the crust.
“Cougar: The Mellencamp Story”
EXT. SONIC DRIVE IN - NIGHT
John sucks on a chili dog.
JOHN
Wait. I got it.
EXT. SONIC DRIVE IN - NIGHT
John sucks on a chili dog.
JOHN
Wait. I got it.
November 11, 2025 at 3:28 PM
“Cougar: The Mellencamp Story”
EXT. SONIC DRIVE IN - NIGHT
John sucks on a chili dog.
JOHN
Wait. I got it.
EXT. SONIC DRIVE IN - NIGHT
John sucks on a chili dog.
JOHN
Wait. I got it.
Reposted by T I M E S C A N N E R
In a Sandwich-themed band my stage name would be Rick Reuben
November 6, 2025 at 8:11 PM
In a Sandwich-themed band my stage name would be Rick Reuben
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average bluesky poster
November 5, 2025 at 2:43 PM
average bluesky poster
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imitation crab is the sincerest form of flattery crab
November 6, 2025 at 12:22 AM
imitation crab is the sincerest form of flattery crab
Reposted by T I M E S C A N N E R
Guys it’s easy to say Dick Cheney should’ve been prosecuted for war crimes. But you’re forgetting one thing. If we start prosecuting people for war crimes, people in the future might get scared about doing war crimes and hesitate before committing war crimes!
November 4, 2025 at 6:14 PM
Guys it’s easy to say Dick Cheney should’ve been prosecuted for war crimes. But you’re forgetting one thing. If we start prosecuting people for war crimes, people in the future might get scared about doing war crimes and hesitate before committing war crimes!
Reposted by T I M E S C A N N E R
naming your son Podcast Guest to ensure a bountiful harvest
November 4, 2025 at 2:43 PM
naming your son Podcast Guest to ensure a bountiful harvest
The Unheimlich Maneuver
November 2, 2025 at 11:53 PM
The Unheimlich Maneuver
Miloš Forman Grill
November 2, 2025 at 11:50 PM
Miloš Forman Grill
Let some wonderfully unusual words and noises wash through your mind.
Happy Haunted Lizard Halloween. Got a new little episode up: may your spine be gnawed gently and slow today.
open.spotify.com/episode/7uyC...
open.spotify.com/episode/7uyC...
October 31, 2025 at 6:45 PM
Let some wonderfully unusual words and noises wash through your mind.
I haven’t been very interested in posting lately. I’ve been using the time I used to spend online practicing electric guitar instead. More satisfying to the soul. But I do miss my old online friends. Say hi anytime you want. I’ll reply next time I log on.
October 26, 2025 at 9:26 PM
I haven’t been very interested in posting lately. I’ve been using the time I used to spend online practicing electric guitar instead. More satisfying to the soul. But I do miss my old online friends. Say hi anytime you want. I’ll reply next time I log on.
A good time to grab my pal Quandary’s whole discography. It’s all fantastic.
my compendium album JUKEBOX BUDDHA officially turns eight tomorrow — to honor the occasion I’ve made my entire discography $0/pwyw. thank you to everyone for listened to my music & supported me over the years!
quandary.bandcamp.com
quandary.bandcamp.com
Dr. Quandary
Kyle Tierce ✧ he/they
beatmaker / music upcycler / soundtrack counterfeiter
portrait illustration by Jessica Hayworth
quandary.bandcamp.com
October 26, 2025 at 9:21 PM
A good time to grab my pal Quandary’s whole discography. It’s all fantastic.
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YES my name is 'vehicula'. NO i am not a car
October 24, 2025 at 10:04 AM
YES my name is 'vehicula'. NO i am not a car