Miriam Jayaratna
@miriamjayaratna.bsky.social
Clinical psychologist and writer of humorous things
Work in The New Yorker, NYT, WSJ, McSweeney’s, Reductress, The Boston Globe, VQR, et al
Work in The New Yorker, NYT, WSJ, McSweeney’s, Reductress, The Boston Globe, VQR, et al
The least plausible part of this Tr*mp blowing Epstein rumor is that he would ever work hard to give someone else pleasure
November 15, 2025 at 5:36 PM
The least plausible part of this Tr*mp blowing Epstein rumor is that he would ever work hard to give someone else pleasure
My latest disgusting food adventure is up on @mcsweeneys.net!
"At first huff, its contents smelled like Fruity Pebbles. The kernels were speckled with brown dots, which I knew from the ingredient list were motes of 'watermelon hibiscus seasoning.' It looked like popcorn that had come down with the measles."
Reviews of New Food: LesserEvil Watermelon Hibiscus Popcorn
The time? High summer. The place? Binghamton, New York. My husband and I were there for a two-week stint, and though we weren’t native to the place...
buff.ly
November 15, 2025 at 1:37 PM
My latest disgusting food adventure is up on @mcsweeneys.net!
Great to see so many male comedians speaking out against Lou*s CK going to Saudi Arabia but why did these same people say nothing after he sexually assaulted women?
October 2, 2025 at 7:27 PM
Great to see so many male comedians speaking out against Lou*s CK going to Saudi Arabia but why did these same people say nothing after he sexually assaulted women?
Reposted by Miriam Jayaratna
A fun piece in @newyorker.com today by me, @miriamjayaratna.bsky.social and Ali Fitzgerald, inspired by Ronnie No Vaccines DeSantis. www.newyorker.com/magazine/202...
Disney World’s New Rides Are Sick
Make sure to wash your hands after Viruses of the Caribbean.
www.newyorker.com
September 29, 2025 at 12:54 PM
A fun piece in @newyorker.com today by me, @miriamjayaratna.bsky.social and Ali Fitzgerald, inspired by Ronnie No Vaccines DeSantis. www.newyorker.com/magazine/202...
Please take @vikshulevich.bsky.social’s advice about the book I haven’t written!
Thrilled to be back in @mcswys today declaring my love of romance books, the delightful tropes and most of all, HEAs. Thanks @cmonks for the pub and my amazing writing friends for the feedback!
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/don...
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/don...
Don’t Judge My Book by Its Cover
Don’t judge my book by its cover.
For the cover art of my debut novel, I envisioned a mysterious, foggy background with two shadowy figures graspi...
www.mcsweeneys.net
August 14, 2025 at 10:00 AM
Please take @vikshulevich.bsky.social’s advice about the book I haven’t written!
Reposted by Miriam Jayaratna
The brilliant @miriamjayaratna.bsky.social, living the king-sized bed dream for @mcsweeneys.net.
"My life partner tosses, turns, and loudly attempts to learn Mandarin on Duolingo. None of these activities requires me to relocate to the couch, which is good, because we no longer have a couch. There’s no room for any furniture in our apartment except the bed."
How I Think a King-Sized Bed Would Transform My Love Life
My husband and I gaze at each other while we brush our teeth, savoring these final moments together before we go our separate ways. I kiss him good...
buff.ly
July 28, 2025 at 3:36 PM
The brilliant @miriamjayaratna.bsky.social, living the king-sized bed dream for @mcsweeneys.net.
I’m on @mcsweeneys.net today with some ideas about how to get a good night’s sleep!
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/how...
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/how...
How I Think a King-Sized Bed Would Transform My Love Life
My husband and I gaze at each other while we brush our teeth, savoring these final moments together before we go our separate ways.
I kiss him good...
www.mcsweeneys.net
July 28, 2025 at 1:50 PM
I’m on @mcsweeneys.net today with some ideas about how to get a good night’s sleep!
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/how...
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/how...
Excellent parenting advice from @wendiaarons.bsky.social!
July 23, 2025 at 5:29 PM
Excellent parenting advice from @wendiaarons.bsky.social!
The best satire sometimes predicts the future, as is the case with this terrific piece about predicting the weather. Thank you @kathrynbaecht.bsky.social and @erinmcreynolds.bsky.social
The awesome @erinmcreynolds.bsky.social and I have a satirical cartoon in the @bostonglobe.com today about budget cuts at NOAA. We created this piece well before the devastating floods here in central Texas. I'm happy for the piece to run, but I also share it with a heavy heart. ❤️ Link in comments.
July 12, 2025 at 11:42 AM
The best satire sometimes predicts the future, as is the case with this terrific piece about predicting the weather. Thank you @kathrynbaecht.bsky.social and @erinmcreynolds.bsky.social
Reposted by Miriam Jayaratna
Such a balm to take a break from the news and just enjoy this delightful summertime humor from the scorching hot @miriamjayaratna.bsky.social, @alisolomain.bsky.social and Kerry Elson!
"A pedestrian 'safety island.' Enjoy lounging on this six-foot urban oasis of grass, cement, and paper plates stained with sunset-hued pizza grease."
Lesser-Known New York City Beaches
A pedestrian “safety island” Enjoy lounging on this six-foot urban oasis of grass, cement, and paper plates stained with sunset-hued pizza grease....
buff.ly
June 30, 2025 at 10:40 PM
Such a balm to take a break from the news and just enjoy this delightful summertime humor from the scorching hot @miriamjayaratna.bsky.social, @alisolomain.bsky.social and Kerry Elson!
This summer’s a real scorcher,
and if you’re in NYC and can’t get
to the beach, @alisolomain.bsky.social,
Kerry Elson and I have some suggestions for how to bring the beach to you!
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/les...
and if you’re in NYC and can’t get
to the beach, @alisolomain.bsky.social,
Kerry Elson and I have some suggestions for how to bring the beach to you!
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/les...
Lesser-Known New York City Beaches
A pedestrian “safety island”
Enjoy lounging on this six-foot urban oasis of grass, cement, and paper plates stained with sunset-hued pizza grease....
www.mcsweeneys.net
June 30, 2025 at 10:00 PM
This summer’s a real scorcher,
and if you’re in NYC and can’t get
to the beach, @alisolomain.bsky.social,
Kerry Elson and I have some suggestions for how to bring the beach to you!
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/les...
and if you’re in NYC and can’t get
to the beach, @alisolomain.bsky.social,
Kerry Elson and I have some suggestions for how to bring the beach to you!
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/les...
Promises made, promises kept 🫡
June 25, 2025 at 6:14 PM
Promises made, promises kept 🫡
The future is looking bright….for the 1%
June 13, 2025 at 2:18 PM
The future is looking bright….for the 1%
www.newyorker.com/humor/shouts...
I wrote a Shouts piece with my friends. We want to be kinky but we’re just so tired.
I wrote a Shouts piece with my friends. We want to be kinky but we’re just so tired.
B.D.S.M. for the Middle-Aged
Now you’re going to sit in that chair and watch me load the dishwasher my way. And you’re not going to say a single word.
www.newyorker.com
April 30, 2025 at 7:52 PM
www.newyorker.com/humor/shouts...
I wrote a Shouts piece with my friends. We want to be kinky but we’re just so tired.
I wrote a Shouts piece with my friends. We want to be kinky but we’re just so tired.
Skype, which I’ve been using unironically since the start of the pandemic for my virtual therapy sessions, will soon be no more 💔
So I wrote this eulogy for it in @wsj.com. RIP to a real one
www.wsj.com/tech/persona...
So I wrote this eulogy for it in @wsj.com. RIP to a real one
www.wsj.com/tech/persona...
Essay | So Long Skype, Thanks for All the Dropped Calls
A few last words for the pioneering videoconferencing app, which Microsoft is finally kicking to the curb.
www.wsj.com
April 26, 2025 at 6:53 PM
Skype, which I’ve been using unironically since the start of the pandemic for my virtual therapy sessions, will soon be no more 💔
So I wrote this eulogy for it in @wsj.com. RIP to a real one
www.wsj.com/tech/persona...
So I wrote this eulogy for it in @wsj.com. RIP to a real one
www.wsj.com/tech/persona...
The pilot of the plane I’m on is literally named Captain Morgan. Pray for me
April 26, 2025 at 11:53 AM
The pilot of the plane I’m on is literally named Captain Morgan. Pray for me
A second Hegseth has hit the group chat
April 20, 2025 at 9:51 PM
A second Hegseth has hit the group chat
Actually, The New Pornographers is the Band, and the Old Pornographer is the Band’s Monster
April 19, 2025 at 1:33 AM
Actually, The New Pornographers is the Band, and the Old Pornographer is the Band’s Monster
Thank you @lisaborders.bsky.social for this hauntingly beautiful cry of anguish
This is not my typical @mcsweeneys.net piece, but these are not typical times. Grateful to the editors for giving me the opportunity to share my thoughts.
"Hell is here, in Boston, in the way a woman’s voice goes unnaturally high as she strangles a shriek when surrounded by six masked people in plainclothes who claim to be police. Hell inhabits the place in your heart where you feel her fear."
April 4, 2025 at 11:54 PM
Thank you @lisaborders.bsky.social for this hauntingly beautiful cry of anguish
Reposted by Miriam Jayaratna
An irreverent — and illustrated! — riff on Mary Oliver’s iconic poem “Wild Geese.” (@miriamjayaratna.bsky.social, @amandalehr.bsky.social, Jenny Kroik)
Unfortunately, This Is What the Soft Animal of Your Body Loves - Electric Literature
A graphic narrative by Miriam Jayaratna, Amanda Lehr, and Jenny Kroik
buff.ly
April 2, 2025 at 3:02 PM
An irreverent — and illustrated! — riff on Mary Oliver’s iconic poem “Wild Geese.” (@miriamjayaratna.bsky.social, @amandalehr.bsky.social, Jenny Kroik)
Reposted by Miriam Jayaratna
Last chance for early bird tickets to Slackjaw Live at Caveat (Lower East Side, NYC) next Monday! Come see us! Emily Menez, @miriamjayaratna.bsky.social, @johnathanappel.bsky.social, Scarlet Meyer, Val Parker, Nicole Beckley, Jamie Mulligan, and me!
www.caveat.nyc/events/slack...
www.caveat.nyc/events/slack...
Slackjaw: LIVE
The internet's funniest pieces read LIVE by your favorite writers. Featuring Johnathan Appel (Last Week Tonight).
www.caveat.nyc
March 24, 2025 at 2:42 PM
Last chance for early bird tickets to Slackjaw Live at Caveat (Lower East Side, NYC) next Monday! Come see us! Emily Menez, @miriamjayaratna.bsky.social, @johnathanappel.bsky.social, Scarlet Meyer, Val Parker, Nicole Beckley, Jamie Mulligan, and me!
www.caveat.nyc/events/slack...
www.caveat.nyc/events/slack...