Reposted by Pirate Monkey Robot ☠️ 🐒 🤖
RFK Jr. Mandates All Americans Drink Mysterious Glowing Liquid https://theonion.com/rfk-jr-mandates-all-americans-drink-mysterious-glowing-liquid/
February 13, 2026 at 10:00 PM
RFK Jr. Mandates All Americans Drink Mysterious Glowing Liquid https://theonion.com/rfk-jr-mandates-all-americans-drink-mysterious-glowing-liquid/
Reposted by Pirate Monkey Robot ☠️ 🐒 🤖
Budweiser Super Bowl Commercial Leaves Man Hankering For Clydesdale Meat
February 9, 2026 at 2:14 AM
Budweiser Super Bowl Commercial Leaves Man Hankering For Clydesdale Meat
Reposted by Pirate Monkey Robot ☠️ 🐒 🤖
Trump Scolds Female Reporter For Being Adult
February 4, 2026 at 10:40 PM
Trump Scolds Female Reporter For Being Adult
Reposted by Pirate Monkey Robot ☠️ 🐒 🤖
The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Pete Hegseth https://theonion.com/the-onions-exclusive-interview-with-pete-hegseth/
February 4, 2026 at 11:00 PM
The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Pete Hegseth https://theonion.com/the-onions-exclusive-interview-with-pete-hegseth/
Reposted by Pirate Monkey Robot ☠️ 🐒 🤖
just rewatched jurassic park, which is something you can just do at any point in your day to instantly make it better
February 4, 2026 at 3:24 AM
just rewatched jurassic park, which is something you can just do at any point in your day to instantly make it better
Daaaaa bears
January 19, 2026 at 2:38 AM
Daaaaa bears
Chicago remains undefeated
January 11, 2026 at 4:40 AM
Chicago remains undefeated
Reposted by Pirate Monkey Robot ☠️ 🐒 🤖
Holy Jesus I didn't look close enough, saw the green logo quickly and thought this was The Onion and started chuckling man what have we done lol
Trump Gets Up, Walks Away From Meeting To Stare Out Window At Ballroom
Trump Gets Up, Walks Away From Meeting To Stare Out Window At Ballroom
Trump Gets Up, Walks Away From Meeting To Stare Out Window At Ballroom
www.huffpost.com
January 10, 2026 at 2:23 AM
Holy Jesus I didn't look close enough, saw the green logo quickly and thought this was The Onion and started chuckling man what have we done lol
Reposted by Pirate Monkey Robot ☠️ 🐒 🤖
Cleansing the timeline with this 2020 Lifetime romance where Mario Lopez played a sexy Colonel Sanders.
January 8, 2026 at 9:32 PM
Cleansing the timeline with this 2020 Lifetime romance where Mario Lopez played a sexy Colonel Sanders.
Reposted by Pirate Monkey Robot ☠️ 🐒 🤖
one problem with learning is it will make you so angry at how stupid everything is
January 3, 2026 at 4:24 PM
one problem with learning is it will make you so angry at how stupid everything is
Reposted by Pirate Monkey Robot ☠️ 🐒 🤖
For those with a male perineum, there’s MOR, a device that can gently zap the area to either delay or intensify ejaculation.
January 5, 2026 at 10:31 PM
For those with a male perineum, there’s MOR, a device that can gently zap the area to either delay or intensify ejaculation.
Reposted by Pirate Monkey Robot ☠️ 🐒 🤖
‘No Way To Prevent This,’ Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens https://theonion.com/no-way-to-prevent-this-says-only-nation-where-this-regularly-happens-3/
December 15, 2025 at 5:21 PM
‘No Way To Prevent This,’ Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens https://theonion.com/no-way-to-prevent-this-says-only-nation-where-this-regularly-happens-3/