Guiness Pig
@guinesspig.bsky.social
Comedian & writer with Long Covid
*Posts are for humor & entertainment*
I write #MaskholeClapbacks jokes & essays for the Covid-Cautious community at guinesspig.ghost.io
Read Wayside: A serial novel for free at: tinyurl.com/wayside-novel
*Posts are for humor & entertainment*
I write #MaskholeClapbacks jokes & essays for the Covid-Cautious community at guinesspig.ghost.io
Read Wayside: A serial novel for free at: tinyurl.com/wayside-novel
Pinned
Guiness Pig
@guinesspig.bsky.social
· Nov 14
Owl: WHO
Me: lied
Owl: Yeah they did, those motherfuckers
Me: lied
Owl: Yeah they did, those motherfuckers
Movie watch party today!
I’m watching ‘The Goonies’ on Netflix today at 3 pm EST.
Join me - details in linked comment!
I’m watching ‘The Goonies’ on Netflix today at 3 pm EST.
Join me - details in linked comment!
November 22, 2025 at 12:49 PM
Movie watch party today!
I’m watching ‘The Goonies’ on Netflix today at 3 pm EST.
Join me - details in linked comment!
I’m watching ‘The Goonies’ on Netflix today at 3 pm EST.
Join me - details in linked comment!
Reposted by Guiness Pig
Need some laughs to get through the hoildays?
We got you!
'Holidays are Endemic: A Virtual Standup Comedy Showcase' over Zoom, December 13 6pm EST
RSVP: tinyurl.com/RSVP12dayscc
Mention ‘Holidays are Endemic Comedy Show’ in message.
More details in flyer below!
We got you!
'Holidays are Endemic: A Virtual Standup Comedy Showcase' over Zoom, December 13 6pm EST
RSVP: tinyurl.com/RSVP12dayscc
Mention ‘Holidays are Endemic Comedy Show’ in message.
More details in flyer below!
November 21, 2025 at 4:04 PM
Need some laughs to get through the hoildays?
We got you!
'Holidays are Endemic: A Virtual Standup Comedy Showcase' over Zoom, December 13 6pm EST
RSVP: tinyurl.com/RSVP12dayscc
Mention ‘Holidays are Endemic Comedy Show’ in message.
More details in flyer below!
We got you!
'Holidays are Endemic: A Virtual Standup Comedy Showcase' over Zoom, December 13 6pm EST
RSVP: tinyurl.com/RSVP12dayscc
Mention ‘Holidays are Endemic Comedy Show’ in message.
More details in flyer below!
Need some laughs to get through the hoildays?
We got you!
'Holidays are Endemic: A Virtual Standup Comedy Showcase' over Zoom, December 13 6pm EST
RSVP: tinyurl.com/RSVP12dayscc
Mention ‘Holidays are Endemic Comedy Show’ in message.
More details in flyer below!
We got you!
'Holidays are Endemic: A Virtual Standup Comedy Showcase' over Zoom, December 13 6pm EST
RSVP: tinyurl.com/RSVP12dayscc
Mention ‘Holidays are Endemic Comedy Show’ in message.
More details in flyer below!
November 21, 2025 at 4:04 PM
Need some laughs to get through the hoildays?
We got you!
'Holidays are Endemic: A Virtual Standup Comedy Showcase' over Zoom, December 13 6pm EST
RSVP: tinyurl.com/RSVP12dayscc
Mention ‘Holidays are Endemic Comedy Show’ in message.
More details in flyer below!
We got you!
'Holidays are Endemic: A Virtual Standup Comedy Showcase' over Zoom, December 13 6pm EST
RSVP: tinyurl.com/RSVP12dayscc
Mention ‘Holidays are Endemic Comedy Show’ in message.
More details in flyer below!
Reposted by Guiness Pig
If you don’t have plans for Thanksgiving & would like to hang with fellow CC folks over Zoom, @kalibutterfly.bsky.social & I invite you to join us for Craftsgiving. Join w/camera on or off. Free. Just a virtual space to enjoy good company with other folks living in reality.😷❤️Deets below.
November 19, 2025 at 2:13 PM
If you don’t have plans for Thanksgiving & would like to hang with fellow CC folks over Zoom, @kalibutterfly.bsky.social & I invite you to join us for Craftsgiving. Join w/camera on or off. Free. Just a virtual space to enjoy good company with other folks living in reality.😷❤️Deets below.
I was grabbing some stuff from a dollar store, saw a little piñata in the party section, & my first thought was oh holy shit I would love to buy that & beat the hell out of it, I don’t even care if candy falls out or not
I think I have fully actualized the anger part of grief
I think I have fully actualized the anger part of grief
November 19, 2025 at 11:40 PM
I was grabbing some stuff from a dollar store, saw a little piñata in the party section, & my first thought was oh holy shit I would love to buy that & beat the hell out of it, I don’t even care if candy falls out or not
I think I have fully actualized the anger part of grief
I think I have fully actualized the anger part of grief
If you don’t have plans for Thanksgiving & would like to hang with fellow CC folks over Zoom, @kalibutterfly.bsky.social & I invite you to join us for Craftsgiving. Join w/camera on or off. Free. Just a virtual space to enjoy good company with other folks living in reality.😷❤️Deets below.
November 19, 2025 at 2:13 PM
If you don’t have plans for Thanksgiving & would like to hang with fellow CC folks over Zoom, @kalibutterfly.bsky.social & I invite you to join us for Craftsgiving. Join w/camera on or off. Free. Just a virtual space to enjoy good company with other folks living in reality.😷❤️Deets below.
Reposted by Guiness Pig
Movie watch party for CC folks on Saturday, 11/22!
This month’s pick is ‘The Goonies,’ in which a group of outcast kids go on a journey to save their neighborhood.
Details in link.
guinesspig.ghost.io/movie-watch-...
This month’s pick is ‘The Goonies,’ in which a group of outcast kids go on a journey to save their neighborhood.
Details in link.
guinesspig.ghost.io/movie-watch-...
Movie Watch Party 11/22/25
For this month's movie watch party, grab some popcorn and join me on Saturday, November 22 at 3pm ET /2pm CT/1pm MT/12 noon PT for "The Goonies" (1985, run time 1 hr 54 min) on Netflix.
You can join ...
guinesspig.ghost.io
November 18, 2025 at 12:53 PM
Movie watch party for CC folks on Saturday, 11/22!
This month’s pick is ‘The Goonies,’ in which a group of outcast kids go on a journey to save their neighborhood.
Details in link.
guinesspig.ghost.io/movie-watch-...
This month’s pick is ‘The Goonies,’ in which a group of outcast kids go on a journey to save their neighborhood.
Details in link.
guinesspig.ghost.io/movie-watch-...
Movie watch party for CC folks on Saturday, 11/22!
This month’s pick is ‘The Goonies,’ in which a group of outcast kids go on a journey to save their neighborhood.
Details in link.
guinesspig.ghost.io/movie-watch-...
This month’s pick is ‘The Goonies,’ in which a group of outcast kids go on a journey to save their neighborhood.
Details in link.
guinesspig.ghost.io/movie-watch-...
Movie Watch Party 11/22/25
For this month's movie watch party, grab some popcorn and join me on Saturday, November 22 at 3pm ET /2pm CT/1pm MT/12 noon PT for "The Goonies" (1985, run time 1 hr 54 min) on Netflix.
You can join ...
guinesspig.ghost.io
November 18, 2025 at 12:53 PM
Movie watch party for CC folks on Saturday, 11/22!
This month’s pick is ‘The Goonies,’ in which a group of outcast kids go on a journey to save their neighborhood.
Details in link.
guinesspig.ghost.io/movie-watch-...
This month’s pick is ‘The Goonies,’ in which a group of outcast kids go on a journey to save their neighborhood.
Details in link.
guinesspig.ghost.io/movie-watch-...
Stranger: Why you wearing a mask
Me: (singing)
I believe the children are our future
We should all protect their little brains
Because in brains,
That’s where the Covid hides
Masking, it brings me pride
Stranger: What
Me: BECAUSE THE GREATEST LOVE OF ALL IS KEEPING THEM SARS-FREE
Me: (singing)
I believe the children are our future
We should all protect their little brains
Because in brains,
That’s where the Covid hides
Masking, it brings me pride
Stranger: What
Me: BECAUSE THE GREATEST LOVE OF ALL IS KEEPING THEM SARS-FREE
a woman wearing a black turtleneck and a ring on her finger .
Alt: Whitney Houston wearing a black turtleneck
media.tenor.com
November 18, 2025 at 12:34 PM
Stranger: Why you wearing a mask
Me: (singing)
I believe the children are our future
We should all protect their little brains
Because in brains,
That’s where the Covid hides
Masking, it brings me pride
Stranger: What
Me: BECAUSE THE GREATEST LOVE OF ALL IS KEEPING THEM SARS-FREE
Me: (singing)
I believe the children are our future
We should all protect their little brains
Because in brains,
That’s where the Covid hides
Masking, it brings me pride
Stranger: What
Me: BECAUSE THE GREATEST LOVE OF ALL IS KEEPING THEM SARS-FREE
Reposted by Guiness Pig
Rudolph the Red-Nosed reindeer was a black sheep because of something on his face that stood out. So when people give you a hard time over the mask on your face, just remember that Rudolph saved Christmas and you’re a badass motherfucker too, out there saving lives and shit. 😷❤️
November 14, 2025 at 12:46 PM
Rudolph the Red-Nosed reindeer was a black sheep because of something on his face that stood out. So when people give you a hard time over the mask on your face, just remember that Rudolph saved Christmas and you’re a badass motherfucker too, out there saving lives and shit. 😷❤️
How I got my first computer… my mom got an MS error message on her computer that said ‘you have performed an illegal operation.’ She was like fuck this, I’m not going to jail, so she gave it to me, then bought a new one for herself that hadn’t performed any illegal operations 🫠
November 17, 2025 at 2:46 AM
How I got my first computer… my mom got an MS error message on her computer that said ‘you have performed an illegal operation.’ She was like fuck this, I’m not going to jail, so she gave it to me, then bought a new one for herself that hadn’t performed any illegal operations 🫠
A nice thing about having ADHD is you don’t have to go Christmas shopping.
Just clean out your closet and you will find tons of brand new shit you forgot you ever bought. Boom! Gifts for you and everyone else you know!
Just clean out your closet and you will find tons of brand new shit you forgot you ever bought. Boom! Gifts for you and everyone else you know!
November 16, 2025 at 1:12 AM
A nice thing about having ADHD is you don’t have to go Christmas shopping.
Just clean out your closet and you will find tons of brand new shit you forgot you ever bought. Boom! Gifts for you and everyone else you know!
Just clean out your closet and you will find tons of brand new shit you forgot you ever bought. Boom! Gifts for you and everyone else you know!
🧵You’re invited to the 12 Days of Covid Consciousmas – a series of free virtual events designed to bring Covid Conscious folks together for the holidays for celebration, connection, and community!
Link in 2nd post, additional details about each event in rest of thread!
(1/9)
Link in 2nd post, additional details about each event in rest of thread!
(1/9)
November 14, 2025 at 4:26 PM
🧵You’re invited to the 12 Days of Covid Consciousmas – a series of free virtual events designed to bring Covid Conscious folks together for the holidays for celebration, connection, and community!
Link in 2nd post, additional details about each event in rest of thread!
(1/9)
Link in 2nd post, additional details about each event in rest of thread!
(1/9)
Rudolph the Red-Nosed reindeer was a black sheep because of something on his face that stood out. So when people give you a hard time over the mask on your face, just remember that Rudolph saved Christmas and you’re a badass motherfucker too, out there saving lives and shit. 😷❤️
November 14, 2025 at 12:46 PM
Rudolph the Red-Nosed reindeer was a black sheep because of something on his face that stood out. So when people give you a hard time over the mask on your face, just remember that Rudolph saved Christmas and you’re a badass motherfucker too, out there saving lives and shit. 😷❤️
Reposted by Guiness Pig
Wayside: A Serial Novel for the Covid Conscious Community, Episode 19
Next of Kin
A younger Ben and Kevin take a break from college life for a weekend trip to Vegas. Shortly after arriving, Ben meets someone who will change the course of his life.
guinesspig.ghost.io/wayside-a-se...
Next of Kin
A younger Ben and Kevin take a break from college life for a weekend trip to Vegas. Shortly after arriving, Ben meets someone who will change the course of his life.
guinesspig.ghost.io/wayside-a-se...
Wayside: A Serial Novel - Episode 19
This is a work of fiction. Unless otherwise indicated, all the names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents in this book are either the product of the author's imagination or used in a ...
guinesspig.ghost.io
November 14, 2025 at 4:39 AM
Wayside: A Serial Novel for the Covid Conscious Community, Episode 19
Next of Kin
A younger Ben and Kevin take a break from college life for a weekend trip to Vegas. Shortly after arriving, Ben meets someone who will change the course of his life.
guinesspig.ghost.io/wayside-a-se...
Next of Kin
A younger Ben and Kevin take a break from college life for a weekend trip to Vegas. Shortly after arriving, Ben meets someone who will change the course of his life.
guinesspig.ghost.io/wayside-a-se...
Wayside: A Serial Novel for the Covid Conscious Community, Episode 19
Next of Kin
A younger Ben and Kevin take a break from college life for a weekend trip to Vegas. Shortly after arriving, Ben meets someone who will change the course of his life.
guinesspig.ghost.io/wayside-a-se...
Next of Kin
A younger Ben and Kevin take a break from college life for a weekend trip to Vegas. Shortly after arriving, Ben meets someone who will change the course of his life.
guinesspig.ghost.io/wayside-a-se...
Wayside: A Serial Novel - Episode 19
This is a work of fiction. Unless otherwise indicated, all the names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents in this book are either the product of the author's imagination or used in a ...
guinesspig.ghost.io
November 14, 2025 at 4:39 AM
Wayside: A Serial Novel for the Covid Conscious Community, Episode 19
Next of Kin
A younger Ben and Kevin take a break from college life for a weekend trip to Vegas. Shortly after arriving, Ben meets someone who will change the course of his life.
guinesspig.ghost.io/wayside-a-se...
Next of Kin
A younger Ben and Kevin take a break from college life for a weekend trip to Vegas. Shortly after arriving, Ben meets someone who will change the course of his life.
guinesspig.ghost.io/wayside-a-se...
I tried to take a pic of the aurora borealis but caught a shooting star instead.
Here’s your chance.
Make a wish, y’all. 😉
(Don’t say it out loud either, we can’t fuck this up, guys)
Here’s your chance.
Make a wish, y’all. 😉
(Don’t say it out loud either, we can’t fuck this up, guys)
November 13, 2025 at 3:55 AM
I tried to take a pic of the aurora borealis but caught a shooting star instead.
Here’s your chance.
Make a wish, y’all. 😉
(Don’t say it out loud either, we can’t fuck this up, guys)
Here’s your chance.
Make a wish, y’all. 😉
(Don’t say it out loud either, we can’t fuck this up, guys)
The 12 Days of Covid Consciousmas are coming!
Wayside: Episode 19 is posted as well for those who are reading along.
Details in link in 1st comment. :)
Wayside: Episode 19 is posted as well for those who are reading along.
Details in link in 1st comment. :)
November 12, 2025 at 3:21 PM
The 12 Days of Covid Consciousmas are coming!
Wayside: Episode 19 is posted as well for those who are reading along.
Details in link in 1st comment. :)
Wayside: Episode 19 is posted as well for those who are reading along.
Details in link in 1st comment. :)
This is beyond fucked up.
And to this date, more than 4,000 human beings detained by 🧊have vanished without a trace.
We cannot allow this to continue.
And to this date, more than 4,000 human beings detained by 🧊have vanished without a trace.
We cannot allow this to continue.
November 9, 2025 at 4:24 PM
This is beyond fucked up.
And to this date, more than 4,000 human beings detained by 🧊have vanished without a trace.
We cannot allow this to continue.
And to this date, more than 4,000 human beings detained by 🧊have vanished without a trace.
We cannot allow this to continue.
H5N1 is making headlines again. When back-to-normal folks ask me what I think about it, here’s what I have to say.
Dear Friend Who is Worried About H5N1...
guinesspig.ghost.io/dear-friend-...
Dear Friend Who is Worried About H5N1...
guinesspig.ghost.io/dear-friend-...
Dear Friend Who is Worried About H5N1...
Dear friend who is worried about H5N1,
You’re certainly not alone. I’m worried about H5N1 too. By now you’ve probably heard about it on the news or in your social media feed. You’ve seen videos of co...
guinesspig.ghost.io
November 7, 2025 at 12:23 PM
H5N1 is making headlines again. When back-to-normal folks ask me what I think about it, here’s what I have to say.
Dear Friend Who is Worried About H5N1...
guinesspig.ghost.io/dear-friend-...
Dear Friend Who is Worried About H5N1...
guinesspig.ghost.io/dear-friend-...
Good day to find out what your fortune is!
November 5, 2025 at 10:53 PM
Good day to find out what your fortune is!
💀💀💀
Please just let me type in the year I was born. No more scrolling. We don’t have to keep doing this to each other.
November 2, 2025 at 6:52 PM
💀💀💀
Holidays can be especially hard for Covid Conscious folks. Let's make this year different.
12 Days of Covid Consciousmas -a holiday season of our own- is coming your way!
Crafting, game nights, movies, comedy, and more are in the works! Details in graphic below. Stay tuned!
12 Days of Covid Consciousmas -a holiday season of our own- is coming your way!
Crafting, game nights, movies, comedy, and more are in the works! Details in graphic below. Stay tuned!
November 1, 2025 at 7:45 PM
Holidays can be especially hard for Covid Conscious folks. Let's make this year different.
12 Days of Covid Consciousmas -a holiday season of our own- is coming your way!
Crafting, game nights, movies, comedy, and more are in the works! Details in graphic below. Stay tuned!
12 Days of Covid Consciousmas -a holiday season of our own- is coming your way!
Crafting, game nights, movies, comedy, and more are in the works! Details in graphic below. Stay tuned!