Toilet Operator
dylanger.info
Toilet Operator
@dylanger.info
How may I direct your call?
Pinned
Asses to asses, butts to butts
Real Wikipedia Hours
January 9, 2026 at 7:34 AM
Bud Light implies the existence of Bud Dark
December 30, 2025 at 10:53 PM
Jorking for penits
December 17, 2025 at 8:52 AM
Rare Catholic W from the Baseball Pope
Pope Leo XIV told students not to use artificial intelligence for homework, saying that AI ‘won’t stand in authentic wonder before the beauty of God’s creation.’
Even God Is Worried About ChatGPT
Pope Leo XIV told students not to use artificial intelligence for homework, saying that AI ‘won’t stand in authentic wonder before the beauty of God’s creation.’
www.vulture.com
December 16, 2025 at 12:43 AM
RIP Ted K, you would have loved the McDonald's App
December 6, 2025 at 5:36 PM
Yard Sale:
Baby Skis
Flung Downhill
December 1, 2025 at 10:16 PM
Reposted by Toilet Operator
inside of you are two otters
November 27, 2025 at 1:11 AM
Last night someone called me "Cowboy" as an IRL insult and I feel like I've officially made the big time
November 21, 2025 at 6:04 PM
"I'm so fucking focuspilled rn"
- Me, taking my meds
October 23, 2025 at 3:54 PM
The water pistol emoji has the same energy as the term "unalived"
September 24, 2025 at 6:15 PM
It's too bad they got him in the neck and not the head. It would have sailed clean through without hitting anything important or useful
September 11, 2025 at 7:42 AM
A vasectomy is what a lobotomy is called when you do it to a guy
September 6, 2025 at 9:20 AM
Asses to asses, butts to butts
August 26, 2025 at 4:59 PM
My cat has been giving me the silent treatment ever since I told him we're not biologically related
August 25, 2025 at 7:01 AM
The Montessori School of Hard Knocks
August 21, 2025 at 8:00 PM
saying "no hetero" every time i kiss my gf
July 29, 2025 at 2:54 AM
Do you ever do a bad thing, just to see how it makes you feel?

We are all hapless prisoners to the horrible possibility of our own actions.

Denny's Diner: come try our T-bone steak today!
July 29, 2025 at 2:51 AM
Somebody should Do It
July 4, 2025 at 2:03 AM
The fantasy of an extraterrestrial invasion is fun escapism because it presents a scenario where our biggest existential threat isn't a consequence of our own actions
June 27, 2025 at 6:22 AM
Believe it or not, the guy who voiced the Bop-It! is actually a sub
June 24, 2025 at 5:21 AM
Reposted by Toilet Operator
DATE: So what do you do?

ME: I race cars.

HER: That’s so cool. Have you won many races?

ME: No, the cars are much faster.
June 23, 2025 at 11:27 AM
Idea for a TV spinoff: "InternET", a story about the weird little alien who gets roped into an unpaid position getting coffee and picking up dry cleaning for some big shot on Wall Street
June 9, 2025 at 6:21 AM
If Jesus Christ was alive today, he would 100% have a podcast
June 6, 2025 at 2:31 AM
There is a vas deferens between cum and pee
June 5, 2025 at 5:17 AM
e=π=√10=3
June 4, 2025 at 7:41 PM