The Name’s Nutz. Neil Nutz.
@colonelnutz.bsky.social
“Fuck off” - Brian Clough, 1991
“Dad Joke Genius” - one of my children, 2025
“Annoying Tosspot” - the other child, 2025
“Dad Joke Genius” - one of my children, 2025
“Annoying Tosspot” - the other child, 2025
Pinned
Daytime adverts - charities
Evening adverts - John Lewis and Friends
It’s truly that time of year again. Get that fooking tree up and put the fooking darts on.
Evening adverts - John Lewis and Friends
It’s truly that time of year again. Get that fooking tree up and put the fooking darts on.
November 10, 2025 at 4:43 PM
Daytime adverts - charities
Evening adverts - John Lewis and Friends
It’s truly that time of year again. Get that fooking tree up and put the fooking darts on.
Evening adverts - John Lewis and Friends
It’s truly that time of year again. Get that fooking tree up and put the fooking darts on.
Shocking, I’ve just been refused service at my local pub because I was wearing a poppy. Threatened to call the police if I didn’t leave and everything.
A diskrace that you can’t honour our heroes anymore.
Even the landlord said “you can’t come in wearing just that, at least put some pants on”
A diskrace that you can’t honour our heroes anymore.
Even the landlord said “you can’t come in wearing just that, at least put some pants on”
November 10, 2025 at 4:23 PM
Shocking, I’ve just been refused service at my local pub because I was wearing a poppy. Threatened to call the police if I didn’t leave and everything.
A diskrace that you can’t honour our heroes anymore.
Even the landlord said “you can’t come in wearing just that, at least put some pants on”
A diskrace that you can’t honour our heroes anymore.
Even the landlord said “you can’t come in wearing just that, at least put some pants on”
My BBC DG manifesto:
1) CBeebies on BBC2 9-12 every weekday morning
2) live EFL or National League coverage for all teams equally
3) the news, Question Time, and all that bollocks is presented in a really fucking boring way again like it used to be
4) Alan Sugar never sees a BBC camera ever again
1) CBeebies on BBC2 9-12 every weekday morning
2) live EFL or National League coverage for all teams equally
3) the news, Question Time, and all that bollocks is presented in a really fucking boring way again like it used to be
4) Alan Sugar never sees a BBC camera ever again
November 9, 2025 at 10:18 PM
My BBC DG manifesto:
1) CBeebies on BBC2 9-12 every weekday morning
2) live EFL or National League coverage for all teams equally
3) the news, Question Time, and all that bollocks is presented in a really fucking boring way again like it used to be
4) Alan Sugar never sees a BBC camera ever again
1) CBeebies on BBC2 9-12 every weekday morning
2) live EFL or National League coverage for all teams equally
3) the news, Question Time, and all that bollocks is presented in a really fucking boring way again like it used to be
4) Alan Sugar never sees a BBC camera ever again
The new BBC Director General has just announced his new slate of programming:
Alexander Armstrong’s Roundabout Painting Trips
The Problem With Unions
Celebrity TERFing
Len Goodman’s Beyond The Grave Nostalgia Hour
Mrs Browns Boys
Hey Duggee, Bluey’s Moved Over Here, Shall We Burn His Hotel?
Alexander Armstrong’s Roundabout Painting Trips
The Problem With Unions
Celebrity TERFing
Len Goodman’s Beyond The Grave Nostalgia Hour
Mrs Browns Boys
Hey Duggee, Bluey’s Moved Over Here, Shall We Burn His Hotel?
November 9, 2025 at 7:29 PM
The new BBC Director General has just announced his new slate of programming:
Alexander Armstrong’s Roundabout Painting Trips
The Problem With Unions
Celebrity TERFing
Len Goodman’s Beyond The Grave Nostalgia Hour
Mrs Browns Boys
Hey Duggee, Bluey’s Moved Over Here, Shall We Burn His Hotel?
Alexander Armstrong’s Roundabout Painting Trips
The Problem With Unions
Celebrity TERFing
Len Goodman’s Beyond The Grave Nostalgia Hour
Mrs Browns Boys
Hey Duggee, Bluey’s Moved Over Here, Shall We Burn His Hotel?
Facebook during Diwali: eurrgh, why are fireworks going off? It’s not Bonfire Night for another week!
Facebook a week after Bonfire Night: oooh, the fireworks are lovely and timely!
Facebook a week after Bonfire Night: oooh, the fireworks are lovely and timely!
November 9, 2025 at 6:40 PM
Facebook during Diwali: eurrgh, why are fireworks going off? It’s not Bonfire Night for another week!
Facebook a week after Bonfire Night: oooh, the fireworks are lovely and timely!
Facebook a week after Bonfire Night: oooh, the fireworks are lovely and timely!
Some absolute crackers from this weekend, but this is one for the ages. A true legend of its genre.
November 9, 2025 at 4:34 PM
Some absolute crackers from this weekend, but this is one for the ages. A true legend of its genre.
Port Vale. Weirdos.
Started with them chanting through the minute silence, continued when a 80 year old fella was offering some of the junior home fans out for a fight, ended with them storming out en masse when the fourth goal went in.
Laughing at them just seemed to make them angrier
#bwfc
Started with them chanting through the minute silence, continued when a 80 year old fella was offering some of the junior home fans out for a fight, ended with them storming out en masse when the fourth goal went in.
Laughing at them just seemed to make them angrier
#bwfc
November 8, 2025 at 8:32 PM
Port Vale. Weirdos.
Started with them chanting through the minute silence, continued when a 80 year old fella was offering some of the junior home fans out for a fight, ended with them storming out en masse when the fourth goal went in.
Laughing at them just seemed to make them angrier
#bwfc
Started with them chanting through the minute silence, continued when a 80 year old fella was offering some of the junior home fans out for a fight, ended with them storming out en masse when the fourth goal went in.
Laughing at them just seemed to make them angrier
#bwfc
I always say that television shows become unwatchable the moment they do a celebrity version.
The Traitors just broke the mould.
Goes to show how good a format it is, and that it should serve the purpose of reminding TV execs that, yes, you can do good things without completely dumbing down.
The Traitors just broke the mould.
Goes to show how good a format it is, and that it should serve the purpose of reminding TV execs that, yes, you can do good things without completely dumbing down.
November 7, 2025 at 11:01 AM
I always say that television shows become unwatchable the moment they do a celebrity version.
The Traitors just broke the mould.
Goes to show how good a format it is, and that it should serve the purpose of reminding TV execs that, yes, you can do good things without completely dumbing down.
The Traitors just broke the mould.
Goes to show how good a format it is, and that it should serve the purpose of reminding TV execs that, yes, you can do good things without completely dumbing down.
An absolute head slapper of an ending #CelebrityTraitors
November 6, 2025 at 10:03 PM
An absolute head slapper of an ending #CelebrityTraitors
New York can finally say they’ve had a new worst day ever.
Jimmy Fallon, James Corden croon Sinatra, Bennett standards for gobsmacked guests in NYC
Jimmy Fallon, James Corden croon Sinatra, Bennett standards for gobsmacked guests in NYC
A source said, "The Eric Newman Jazz Band was playing, and before long, Fallon and Corden were up onstage trading Sinatra and Tony Bennett tunes!"
pagesix.com
November 6, 2025 at 4:08 PM
New York can finally say they’ve had a new worst day ever.
UPDATE: yeah, I’m there.
OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD I must get tickets to the MK Bowl, I must I must I must
November 5, 2025 at 9:10 AM
UPDATE: yeah, I’m there.
Just seen my first Christmas adverts.
Get that fooking tree up.
Get that fooking tree up.
November 4, 2025 at 8:17 PM
Just seen my first Christmas adverts.
Get that fooking tree up.
Get that fooking tree up.
The letter S has fallen off the sign in the background
November 4, 2025 at 5:54 PM
The letter S has fallen off the sign in the background
Right, as there’s nothing on TV tonight, I’m going to warm myself up for Thursday’s #CelebrityTraitors final by spending the next three evenings binge watching the best season of Civvy #TheTraitors there has ever been…UK Season 2
November 3, 2025 at 7:07 PM
Right, as there’s nothing on TV tonight, I’m going to warm myself up for Thursday’s #CelebrityTraitors final by spending the next three evenings binge watching the best season of Civvy #TheTraitors there has ever been…UK Season 2
THRILLING CHASE UNDERWAY
November 3, 2025 at 6:35 PM
THRILLING CHASE UNDERWAY
OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD I must get tickets to the MK Bowl, I must I must I must
November 3, 2025 at 6:35 PM
OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD I must get tickets to the MK Bowl, I must I must I must
Just had my first will writing pack through on this, the day of the anniversary of my birth.
I have hit 50 today
November 3, 2025 at 12:22 PM
Just had my first will writing pack through on this, the day of the anniversary of my birth.
I have hit 50 today
November 3, 2025 at 6:23 AM
I have hit 50 today
I am 50 years old tomorrow.
November 2, 2025 at 8:20 PM
I am 50 years old tomorrow.
I feel obliged to once again remind everyone to stop doing the “amplifying wankers” thing.
Regular reminder: stop posting screenshots of shit that wankers say, with the title “look at this shit that this wanker said”. Especially when that shit was said in a place most of us bailed on and came here to avoid said shit from said wanker.
November 2, 2025 at 7:48 PM
I feel obliged to once again remind everyone to stop doing the “amplifying wankers” thing.
Fucking love Chicagoans. Joyfully honest.
great hot mic moment on Chicago Fire radio heading into halftime
November 1, 2025 at 11:20 PM
Fucking love Chicagoans. Joyfully honest.
