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briesmith.xyz
Roast TurkBrie 🍗
@briesmith.xyz
The Internet's foremost Rory Gilmore hater. Still the Ray Kroc Professor of Cheeseburger Sciences, Hamburger University. Kentucky Colonel. She/her. #bbn

Shirts and more! https://www.teepublic.com/user/wondershout

Signal:@quietude38.04
A movie that takes place where you’re from
November 24, 2025 at 2:37 AM
Hee hee well the other day you know I had a ricochet biscuit
A ricochet biscuit is the kind of a biscuit that's
Supposed to bounce back off the wall back in your mouth
Hee hee hee if it don't bounce back... hee hee you go hungry!
Bow bow bow
November 22, 2025 at 11:45 PM
If you're cheering for Yale over Harvard today, this is the monster you're supporting:
November 22, 2025 at 5:24 PM
I mean, when I graduated in 2002 we had 1300 students in the entire school

It’s a big barn
November 22, 2025 at 12:40 AM
I wish
November 21, 2025 at 12:38 PM
Wwwwwwwwwwwwwelcome to the Shutdown Fullchest
November 21, 2025 at 3:05 AM
STOP. This is a selfie checkpoint. You must repost with a cute selfie to proceed.
November 20, 2025 at 5:10 PM
Today is day 553 of HRT, and by my calculation, I’ve had roughly a sugar cube’s worth of estradiol as a result. That such a relatively small amount of something could have such an effect on me is amazing.

Tiny efforts, repeated with consistency, can make massive changes. A lesson for us all.
November 20, 2025 at 2:14 AM
Yup, nothing says “opulence” like a Kia Sportáge
November 19, 2025 at 8:36 PM
November 18, 2025 at 11:41 PM
Who’s on your TV dad Mount Rushmore?
November 18, 2025 at 5:43 PM
Wow, @aceanbender.com, broken clock was right today
November 17, 2025 at 11:02 PM
We all start somewhere
November 17, 2025 at 2:25 AM
This is what I’m dealing with. $9 a pound.
November 17, 2025 at 12:01 AM
Hello, fellow sober friend
November 15, 2025 at 1:04 AM
Tag yourself, I’m “Gone but not forgotten” with a winged angel T. rex
November 14, 2025 at 7:19 PM
Wonder what’s under that sweater? Could it be… nothing?
November 14, 2025 at 3:08 AM
This Evangeline says, and I quote, “there’s only room for one Evangeline in this town!”

Also she goes by Evan all the time anyway
November 14, 2025 at 1:39 AM
I’m asking. Here’s the recipe:
November 13, 2025 at 6:41 PM
November 13, 2025 at 4:20 PM
Here’s the 2019 edition:
November 12, 2025 at 10:31 PM
Lex staring at me extremely “what the fuck, lady”-ly
November 12, 2025 at 10:21 PM
November 12, 2025 at 8:50 PM
This checks out
November 11, 2025 at 2:44 PM
November 10, 2025 at 9:57 PM