Milford Thomas Milford III
@milfordthomas.bsky.social
• elite shitposter
• writer
• AuDHD
• non-binary
subscribe to my Substack for free here:
https://substack.com/@thetraumareport?r=1m6877&utm_medium=ios
• writer
• AuDHD
• non-binary
subscribe to my Substack for free here:
https://substack.com/@thetraumareport?r=1m6877&utm_medium=ios
Pinned
me when i’m so tweaked on Adderall i just start playing dress up with random shit that happens to be laying around
i luv adhd
December 1, 2025 at 5:57 AM
i luv adhd
it has, but it was posted da l o n g w a y,
calvin and hobbes da looongway
so the text was too small and i didn’t repost it
calvin and hobbes da looongway
so the text was too small and i didn’t repost it
December 1, 2025 at 5:06 AM
it has, but it was posted da l o n g w a y,
calvin and hobbes da looongway
so the text was too small and i didn’t repost it
calvin and hobbes da looongway
so the text was too small and i didn’t repost it
i’m boarding some bored darlings
December 1, 2025 at 4:22 AM
i’m boarding some bored darlings
Reposted by Milford Thomas Milford III
one of the milkshake boys in the yard turned out to be lactose intolerant and has shit on the porch
November 30, 2025 at 7:01 PM
one of the milkshake boys in the yard turned out to be lactose intolerant and has shit on the porch
for sure
let’s work on the slogan, but
for sure
let’s work on the slogan, but
for sure
December 1, 2025 at 3:08 AM
for sure
let’s work on the slogan, but
for sure
let’s work on the slogan, but
for sure
so basically my worlds are colliding in the best way rn
December 1, 2025 at 2:20 AM
so basically my worlds are colliding in the best way rn
watching a video of Nick Offerman on his Substack called Donkey Thoughts and he is currently referencing the extremely niche band cloud cult
what the fuck is happening right now
what the fuck is happening right now
December 1, 2025 at 1:51 AM
watching a video of Nick Offerman on his Substack called Donkey Thoughts and he is currently referencing the extremely niche band cloud cult
what the fuck is happening right now
what the fuck is happening right now
strong floor
strong ceiling
bussy tight, bussy good, bussy clean
strong ceiling
bussy tight, bussy good, bussy clean
wait. “strong floor no ceiling” is NOT about kegels?
December 1, 2025 at 1:33 AM
strong floor
strong ceiling
bussy tight, bussy good, bussy clean
strong ceiling
bussy tight, bussy good, bussy clean
like darling your car says you need money for medical bills + poison
what do you reckon the 2 are connected
what do you reckon the 2 are connected
December 1, 2025 at 1:31 AM
like darling your car says you need money for medical bills + poison
what do you reckon the 2 are connected
what do you reckon the 2 are connected
u know how people will write their cashapp and venmo on their car hoping random people will send them stuff
typically they will be like “it’s my birthday” or whatever but this one i just saw said “medical bills & booze”
typically they will be like “it’s my birthday” or whatever but this one i just saw said “medical bills & booze”
December 1, 2025 at 1:00 AM
u know how people will write their cashapp and venmo on their car hoping random people will send them stuff
typically they will be like “it’s my birthday” or whatever but this one i just saw said “medical bills & booze”
typically they will be like “it’s my birthday” or whatever but this one i just saw said “medical bills & booze”
AND YOU DONT EVEN HAVE THE STRONG FLOOR PART DOWN
OUR FLOOR SUCKS
OUR FLOOR SUCKS
December 1, 2025 at 12:08 AM
AND YOU DONT EVEN HAVE THE STRONG FLOOR PART DOWN
OUR FLOOR SUCKS
OUR FLOOR SUCKS
“Strong floor, no ceiling”
okay well then call up the crew and start building because it sounds like you have some more work to do, Steve
i specifically asked for a ceiling
okay well then call up the crew and start building because it sounds like you have some more work to do, Steve
i specifically asked for a ceiling
December 1, 2025 at 12:05 AM
“Strong floor, no ceiling”
okay well then call up the crew and start building because it sounds like you have some more work to do, Steve
i specifically asked for a ceiling
okay well then call up the crew and start building because it sounds like you have some more work to do, Steve
i specifically asked for a ceiling
here’s the thing about “strong floor, no ceiling”
when you are building a human structure of any kind, the ceiling is lowkey the centerpiece of the whole jam
like you could technically even go no walls if u had a roof, but you can’t not have a roof
when you are building a human structure of any kind, the ceiling is lowkey the centerpiece of the whole jam
like you could technically even go no walls if u had a roof, but you can’t not have a roof
December 1, 2025 at 12:02 AM
here’s the thing about “strong floor, no ceiling”
when you are building a human structure of any kind, the ceiling is lowkey the centerpiece of the whole jam
like you could technically even go no walls if u had a roof, but you can’t not have a roof
when you are building a human structure of any kind, the ceiling is lowkey the centerpiece of the whole jam
like you could technically even go no walls if u had a roof, but you can’t not have a roof
Reposted by Milford Thomas Milford III
"Strong floor, no ceiling" is very literally the basis of like every Gilded Age political cartoon
November 30, 2025 at 9:41 PM
"Strong floor, no ceiling" is very literally the basis of like every Gilded Age political cartoon
spectacular, i’ll be sure not to be there
and Hamilton? GET your ass back in a chemistry lab before i pop you with a wet towel through your lab coat
and Hamilton? GET your ass back in a chemistry lab before i pop you with a wet towel through your lab coat
Tomorrow Grimes will DJ a livestream of immortality influencer Bryan Johnson tripping on shrooms to determine its effect on longevity. Mr. Beast and the CEO of Salesforce will be there too.
Grimes DJing Immortality Influencer's Shroom Trip With Special Guest Mr. Beast
Grimes is a fan of Bryan Johnson, the multimillionaire and immortality influencer who spends his time trying to fight death. He is perhaps best known for undergoing plasma transfusions with donations ...
stereogum.com
November 30, 2025 at 11:35 PM
spectacular, i’ll be sure not to be there
and Hamilton? GET your ass back in a chemistry lab before i pop you with a wet towel through your lab coat
and Hamilton? GET your ass back in a chemistry lab before i pop you with a wet towel through your lab coat
i always like the thanksgiving leftovers way more than the actual meal so i usually just skip to that part
i make no meal and get a Bobbie from Capriotti’s
one is enough because i mean look at this beaut
i make no meal and get a Bobbie from Capriotti’s
one is enough because i mean look at this beaut
November 30, 2025 at 11:32 PM
i always like the thanksgiving leftovers way more than the actual meal so i usually just skip to that part
i make no meal and get a Bobbie from Capriotti’s
one is enough because i mean look at this beaut
i make no meal and get a Bobbie from Capriotti’s
one is enough because i mean look at this beaut
what kind of esoteric bullshit is this lol
No value, no villain, no vision. Sounds like the tagline for the earnings call of a collapsing appliance retailer
November 30, 2025 at 7:51 PM
what kind of esoteric bullshit is this lol
asking genuinely
November 30, 2025 at 7:20 PM
asking genuinely
politics, grr arg
cat, cute fluffy
jasonderulo
cat, cute fluffy
jasonderulo
November 30, 2025 at 6:10 PM
politics, grr arg
cat, cute fluffy
jasonderulo
cat, cute fluffy
jasonderulo
like. sorry i’m a revolutionary
maybe you shouldn’t be like the face of the banality of modern evil and i wouldn’t have to exist in this form
maybe you shouldn’t be like the face of the banality of modern evil and i wouldn’t have to exist in this form
November 30, 2025 at 5:51 PM
like. sorry i’m a revolutionary
maybe you shouldn’t be like the face of the banality of modern evil and i wouldn’t have to exist in this form
maybe you shouldn’t be like the face of the banality of modern evil and i wouldn’t have to exist in this form
i saw someone stole my zeitgeist-defining reel without credit the other day, which is fine, but i went to say something snarky in the comments and even reposts of this upper crust disruptor have their comments limited by instagram 😭
November 30, 2025 at 5:50 PM
i saw someone stole my zeitgeist-defining reel without credit the other day, which is fine, but i went to say something snarky in the comments and even reposts of this upper crust disruptor have their comments limited by instagram 😭
if yall aren’t on instagram, u don’t understand what a coveted follow this is
feeling famous rn
feeling famous rn
November 30, 2025 at 4:21 PM
if yall aren’t on instagram, u don’t understand what a coveted follow this is
feeling famous rn
feeling famous rn
book in the bath, you read a book in the bath 🛀
everybody’s doin it, the book in the bath 🎶
what, u guys don’t know that song?
everybody’s doin it, the book in the bath 🎶
what, u guys don’t know that song?
Book friends, I am struggling so hard to pick up anything. My anxiety has been the worst I can remember and just sitting still has been an issue. 😭 I can’t focus.
How do you cope?
How do you cope?
November 30, 2025 at 4:07 PM
book in the bath, you read a book in the bath 🛀
everybody’s doin it, the book in the bath 🎶
what, u guys don’t know that song?
everybody’s doin it, the book in the bath 🎶
what, u guys don’t know that song?
i was the master at disappearing with drug and alcohol in my pockets and system
this one time in New Orleans i went to visit my gf and like i had to wait a couple hours for her to get off work and this older gay man invited me into his home from the street for some wine to try and seduce me but i knew that + was/am a sneaky alcoholic so i drank the wine then escaped
November 30, 2025 at 4:00 PM
i was the master at disappearing with drug and alcohol in my pockets and system
the thing about age is i will end your life
November 30, 2025 at 3:51 PM
the thing about age is i will end your life