Joshua Alan Doetsch
@joshuadoetsch.bsky.social
Video game and tabletop scrivnomancer. Senior Writer at Funcom (Dune: Awakening and Conan Exiles). Friend to corvids and cephalopods. He/Him
Pinned
My story “The Strange Addiction of Johnny Peculiar”is now available on this anthology.
Goodnight out there, whatever you are.
a man in a tuxedo holds a lit candle in his hand
ALT: a man in a tuxedo holds a lit candle in his hand
media.tenor.com
December 19, 2025 at 7:08 AM
Goodnight out there, whatever you are.
I love that Remmick is a horrific supernatural evil… but he’s interesting. A mystery worth learning about, worth banter and a climactic battle.
The klansmen, however, are not interesting, not worth learning about, and only good for storing hot bullets inside.
The klansmen, however, are not interesting, not worth learning about, and only good for storing hot bullets inside.
December 19, 2025 at 5:33 AM
I love that Remmick is a horrific supernatural evil… but he’s interesting. A mystery worth learning about, worth banter and a climactic battle.
The klansmen, however, are not interesting, not worth learning about, and only good for storing hot bullets inside.
The klansmen, however, are not interesting, not worth learning about, and only good for storing hot bullets inside.
Reposted by Joshua Alan Doetsch
Don’t never let these old folk try to moralize to you fam y’all have no idea how chaotically horny y’all’s parents were at 9pm on Mondays
December 19, 2025 at 4:11 AM
Don’t never let these old folk try to moralize to you fam y’all have no idea how chaotically horny y’all’s parents were at 9pm on Mondays
International polycule jewel thieves are the only way forward.
polyamory is on the rise because economic inflation and security advancements have made two-person bank heists practically unfeasible
December 19, 2025 at 3:09 AM
International polycule jewel thieves are the only way forward.
Reposted by Joshua Alan Doetsch
Indie Dev discovers the game they're making basically already exists, worried of being deemed a ripoff. Original dev responds.
December 18, 2025 at 4:49 PM
Indie Dev discovers the game they're making basically already exists, worried of being deemed a ripoff. Original dev responds.
Goodnight out there, whatever you are.
December 18, 2025 at 8:42 AM
Goodnight out there, whatever you are.
When the voice actor compliments one of my lines during recording.
a man in a mask stands in front of a door that says ' elevator '
ALT: a man in a mask stands in front of a door that says ' elevator '
media.tenor.com
December 18, 2025 at 1:46 AM
When the voice actor compliments one of my lines during recording.
Reposted by Joshua Alan Doetsch
One of the biggest moments of my career:
USCIS canceled my client’s naturalization oath ceremony. We filed a lawsuit, went to trial, and the judge swore him in right there in the courtroom!
USCIS canceled my client’s naturalization oath ceremony. We filed a lawsuit, went to trial, and the judge swore him in right there in the courtroom!
December 16, 2025 at 3:21 PM
One of the biggest moments of my career:
USCIS canceled my client’s naturalization oath ceremony. We filed a lawsuit, went to trial, and the judge swore him in right there in the courtroom!
USCIS canceled my client’s naturalization oath ceremony. We filed a lawsuit, went to trial, and the judge swore him in right there in the courtroom!
One of my favorite projects to work on. Getting to work on splat pages really excited the teenage White Wolf fanboy in me.
On this day in 2013 we released Vampire: The Requiem Second Edition in POD and PDF via our partners at @drivethrurpg.com www.drivethrurpg.com/en/product/1... Pick up this modern gothic storytelling game set in the Chronicles of Darkness today! #ttrpg #VampiretheRequiem #VTR
December 16, 2025 at 9:09 PM
One of my favorite projects to work on. Getting to work on splat pages really excited the teenage White Wolf fanboy in me.
Reposted by Joshua Alan Doetsch
"Ideally the president wouldn’t be someone whose face was featured on novelty condoms at the rape palace of history’s most notorious pedophile"
-attribution unknown
-attribution unknown
December 16, 2025 at 2:18 AM
"Ideally the president wouldn’t be someone whose face was featured on novelty condoms at the rape palace of history’s most notorious pedophile"
-attribution unknown
-attribution unknown
Reposted by Joshua Alan Doetsch
This is what happens when the FBI is run by two right-wing conspiracy theorist podcasters who spent the last 11 months purging almost anyone with institutional knowledge from the bureau. They're going to keep fucking this kind of thing up.
BREAKING: Authorities will release the person of interest in the Brown University shooting, officials said, as the investigation continues.
Live updates: Person of interest identified after 2 killed and 9 injured at Brown University
Live updates: 2 dead, 9 wounded in Brown University shooting; person of interest in custody
nbcnews.to
December 15, 2025 at 5:45 AM
This is what happens when the FBI is run by two right-wing conspiracy theorist podcasters who spent the last 11 months purging almost anyone with institutional knowledge from the bureau. They're going to keep fucking this kind of thing up.
Reposted by Joshua Alan Doetsch
Well, fuck.
I’m starting to suspect that our ability to catch spree killers who leave the scene is extremely dependent on a functioning FBI…which we 100% do not have right now.
I’m starting to suspect that our ability to catch spree killers who leave the scene is extremely dependent on a functioning FBI…which we 100% do not have right now.
BREAKING: Person of interest in Brown University shooting being released by police, mayor says. Gunman is still at large
December 15, 2025 at 4:06 AM
Well, fuck.
I’m starting to suspect that our ability to catch spree killers who leave the scene is extremely dependent on a functioning FBI…which we 100% do not have right now.
I’m starting to suspect that our ability to catch spree killers who leave the scene is extremely dependent on a functioning FBI…which we 100% do not have right now.
Goodnight out there, whatever you are.
December 14, 2025 at 9:08 AM
Goodnight out there, whatever you are.
Like father, like spawn.
December 13, 2025 at 10:49 PM
Like father, like spawn.
Goodnight out there, whatever you are.
December 13, 2025 at 7:48 AM
Goodnight out there, whatever you are.
Six years ago. I still think I don’t understand the assignment.
December 12, 2025 at 8:40 PM
Six years ago. I still think I don’t understand the assignment.
Reposted by Joshua Alan Doetsch
Trump Calls Groceries ‘A Hoax’
Trump Calls Groceries ‘A Hoax’
MOUNT POCONO, PA—Delivering a highly anticipated speech about the state of the economy, President Donald Trump doubled down this week on his claim that groceries were a hoax perpetrated by Democrats. ...
theonion.com
December 11, 2025 at 11:00 PM
Trump Calls Groceries ‘A Hoax’
Goodnight out there, whatever you are.
December 10, 2025 at 6:03 AM
Goodnight out there, whatever you are.
Reposted by Joshua Alan Doetsch
Tubi is such a crazy streaming service. It’s like if the Criterion Closet was in a gas station
December 9, 2025 at 10:49 PM
Tubi is such a crazy streaming service. It’s like if the Criterion Closet was in a gas station
Feeling cute, might strip Thor of his power and banish him to Midgard later... IDK.
December 9, 2025 at 9:11 PM
Feeling cute, might strip Thor of his power and banish him to Midgard later... IDK.
Goodnight out there, whatever you are.
December 9, 2025 at 7:43 AM
Goodnight out there, whatever you are.
Reposted by Joshua Alan Doetsch
“I brought this horrid creature into the world, and now I must take him out!” Winfrey said
Oprah Pursues Dr. Phil On Ship Through Arctic
THE ARCTIC CIRCLE—With a vow to destroy the abomination she had created if it was the last thing she ever did, television host Oprah Winfrey has spent weeks on a ship pursuing Dr. Phil through the Arc...
theonion.com
December 9, 2025 at 12:30 AM
“I brought this horrid creature into the world, and now I must take him out!” Winfrey said
Form of… silver fox!
December 9, 2025 at 1:28 AM
Form of… silver fox!