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Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist

@joehumphrey.bsky.social

1.1K followers 2.9K following 4.3K posts

Writer, artist https://linktr.ee/Joehumphrey joehumphrey.com

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Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 2d

Hey new followers! I'm Joe, a writer and an artist living in Victoria, BC, Canada. I draw portraits and write scary stories and sexy stories.

My newest book, Danny, is available now!
a.co/d/8br61QM

I have a blog:
joehumphrey.online

You can buy prints of my art here: www.etsy.com/shop/joehump...

Joe Humphrey

Official homepage for Author Joe Humphrey

joehumphrey.online

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 12h

Well I will
Well I will

a man sits on the beach playing a guitar next to a small fire

Alt: Ken from the Barbie movie playing Push on guitar

media.tenor.com

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 1d

I always talk shit about John Carpenter but I gotta say, I do like Star Man. I haven't seen it since like, 1985, but that opening shot of the satalite playing Satisfation over the earth was epic as fuck.

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 1d

I always skip While My Guitar Gently Weeps even though I love it and it's one of George's best songs, because Eric Clapton plays on it and I hate Eric Clapton more than most people on earth.

Reposted by Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist

Mike Flanagan @mikeflanaganfilm.com · 3d

Pretty sure we’re living one

Franny Longbottom @longfran15.bsky.social · 3d

@mikeflanaganfilm.com can we get a George Orwell horror series?

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Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 1d

Well, that escalated quickly.
Let's manifest something good for next year.

It's not actually Fight Club with vampires, but it's gonna deal with some similar things, while also being its own thing

The cover for my upcoming novel Dee and Birdy, with the subtitle
"It's fucking Fight Club with vampires"

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 1d

I thought you meant Sally Hawkins at first, and I was really confused because, as far as I know, she's not particularly controversial. But then my brain caught up

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Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 1d

I haven't drawn Dee in a way that I'm satisfied with, but they're my non-binary vampire from my books Jack and Danny, and probably my next book too. They're black, Jewish, and land outside of the gender binary. I love writing them, and I really hope to feature them more prominently in the future

Angel of Altabestudio ❤️ @altabestudio.com · 1d

#<3oc
Show and talk about a lesser known OC of yours.

#oc #art #ocquestion #ocprompt

Mayshing banner. Mayshing (purple hair white gown) priestess sitting in a tree house in the sky and sipping tea with canvas on the side.

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 1d

Where does that kid from Mask come in?

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 1d

I'm in Canada, but I guess we're not doing Thanksgiving this year, so happy Thanksgiving to the Canadians who celebrate.

Either way, if you're an American celebrating Christopher Columbus today, examine your soul.

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 1d

If your argument against trans people is "if an archeologist digs up your bones" then you're a fucking dingus. Since when are archeologists the defining last word on gender? Shut up with that nonsense. You bring NOTHING to the table when you come at me with that shit.

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 1d

My review of Tron: Ares
joehumphrey.online/tron-ares/

Tron: Ares

Gets its own post because I have things to say

joehumphrey.online

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 1d

Oh, what a butthole

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 1d

I'm not even sure that's backhanded. It just seems straight up mean to me

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 1d

I mean, his name COULD be Scoot McNairy and then where would he be?

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 1d

I used to give Crispin Glover shit (not personally, I don't know the man, but just into the ether) because he goes by Crispin Hellion Glover. But if I had two names, and one of them was Crispin and the other was Hellion, I'd probably lean into the Hellion more, too.

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Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 1d

The #WIPSnips word for October 12th is "hope" #WriteSky #WritingCommunity #WritingPrompts

This is from my first novel, Charlie. She is recovering from a traumatic emergency medical procedure.

At one point a chaplain came to the room, offering a sympathetic ear if Charlie needed to talk. She ignored him too. When he refused to take no for an answer, Charlie told him that both he and Almighty God could get fucked and never speak to her again. The chaplain nodded and left.
The second week saw the removal of her bandages and she was able to stop wearing the oversized sanitary pads. She was done bleeding. Done forever for that matter. There was a long scar running across the bottom of her stomach between her hips, clouded with hideous green and purple and yellow bruises and the orange stain of antiseptic soap. There was no mirror in the room, but she’d seen it well enough in the shower to know it wasn’t pretty. It shouldn’t be pretty. It was the hole where her hopes and dreams were ripped out of her and discarded.
The doctors thought she was depressed, and perhaps she was, but she didn’t feel depressed. There was absolutely nothing inside her. Not sadness or regret or anger or even confusion. She was an empty vessel. A ghost ship, drifting aimlessly in circles on an indifferent ocean. Nurses and doctors and therapists spoke down to her as if from the mouth of a well that she was at the bottom of, and she had no interest in climbing out.

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Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 2d

When I was around 7 or 8 years old my biggest heroes were Kareem Abdul Jabbar and Henry Mancini. I didn't know shit about basketball but for some reason I would have trusted that man with my life.

Also Baby Elephant Walk was my total jam.

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 2d

I'm looking forward to the new Wicked movie because then I can go around saying obnoxious shit like scandalocious

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 2d

You Kids Are Soft. You Lack Discipline! GIF

Alt: You Kids Are Soft. You Lack Discipline! GIF

media.tenor.com

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 2d

I have a question for everyone out there:
Who is your daddy and what does he do?

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 2d

also: Commissions!
I'll totally draw something badass for you. It's gotta be a portrait of some kind, but I'm pretty open to most things.

$100 USD and that gets you the drawing and a physical print.

I've been working in Clip Studio Paint lately, and really enjoying it, and I'd love some work.

a drawing of Jon Bernthal as Frank Castle

A drawing of Vlad from What We Do in the Shadows screaming while surrounded by women

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Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 2d

Joe Humphrey

Official homepage for Author Joe Humphrey

joehumphrey.online

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 2d

My visual image is very literal.

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 2d

Thank you. Me too!

Joe Humphrey | Writer and Artist @joehumphrey.bsky.social · 2d

I just thought of the line "Get the crotch-squirrel out of my face," and I don't know what it means.

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