J. Michael Mull
@jmichaelmull.bsky.social
2.7K followers 590 following 6.7K posts
I've ran out of clever things to write here about five social networks ago, so I'm just gonna play this out a little bit and see if it sticks.
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jmichaelmull.bsky.social
Everybody talks a big game about how much they love a shower beer, yet when I bring a 24-pack of Heineken to share in the locker room showers, I'm labeled a public menace. Oh well, that's the easiest way I ever got my membership canceled. Arrivederci, Women's Workout World
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
Lust Month Icons, Day 14: Peach and Eggplant Emojis
A picture is worth a 1,000 NSFW words. These vegan-approved 21st century hieroglyphics transcend language, forming a cross-cultural code instantly symbolizing lust and desire.
Princess Peach from the Mario video game series holding a peach and
The Eggplant Wizard from the Kid Icarus series holding an eggplant
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
you've come to the right place
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
sorry, I apparently have to go block the umpteenth sex pest you've all interacted with for years, that I've absolutely never heard of in my life, just so you can browbeat me further to "DO! BETTER!"
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
you are the duct tape holding this place together
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
*scrollling*
quote tweet of Fox News
quote tweet of Truth Social Post
quote tweet of Fox News
quote tweet of actual twitter conversation
quote tweet about Bari Weiss that was quote tweeted ad nauseam yesterday
quote tweet of Aaron Rupar quote tweeting Fox News
pic of some guys dick
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
setting the tone early by getting into a 20-minute bitch fest on the car showroom floor with the salesperson over which color they find sophisticated is both trite and speciously dishonest in an increasingly unsophisticated society
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
Answering the door on Halloween while eating out of a party size bag of Doritos and letting the kid put his hand in and take whatever he can pull out. I'm what you call a disruptor.
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
she's the epitome of aging gracefully
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
Lust Month Icon, Day 13: Isabella Rossellini
A true Italian Renaissance. Her allure is a compelling duality of soft-spoken elegance concealing a raw, untamed heat. Her charisma smolders, driven by a sharp, hypnotic intellect reflected in eyes that are warm, knowing, and impossible to read.
Isabella Rossellini on 30 Rock saying OH, DAMMIT JOHNNY, YOU KNOW
I LOVE MY BIG BEEF N' CHEDDAR
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
Youtuber: Sound off in the comments.
Me: Yeah, that's why I'm typing it
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
you gotta go when you gotta go
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
me in 15 years: another TRON?!?
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
yes, I'm crumbling, but I have enough structural integrity to keep it all together
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
You think you had it rough? As a child, I was only allowed to put hard cheese on my impossible burger. Now that’s rough!
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
TiVo was our species technological apex
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
he lived a full life in his short years
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
Sonic & Mooseknuckles expansion pack
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
Happy Indigenous Peoples' Day, to my racist Italian neighbor only
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
Yeah, you could say I'm into role-play. I play myself, and you play the role of someone who is into me
jmichaelmull.bsky.social
you could've stopped at "Unfortunately many people (tankies) have issues"