A. Parise
@jerseyoutwest.bsky.social
I like soup. Sci-fi writer. Data architect. BLM. ACAB includes AI. Plants, rocks, cats, occasional hiking pics. He/him. Located in sunny NE Portland, OR.
Also I wrote this li’l thing: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08CKXS61S
Also I wrote this li’l thing: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08CKXS61S
Are there any other roads in the US other than the Garden State Parkway where paying tolls involves yeeting a handful of change into a hopper because it felt so normal growing up but now that i’m doing it again fifteen years on it feels charmingly weird.
December 24, 2025 at 5:10 AM
Are there any other roads in the US other than the Garden State Parkway where paying tolls involves yeeting a handful of change into a hopper because it felt so normal growing up but now that i’m doing it again fifteen years on it feels charmingly weird.
There have been some baseless accusations tossed around that i have too many houseplants, i hope these simple watering instructions and list of locations i’m leaving for my tenant to follow while we’re out of town puts any such allegations to rest.
December 20, 2025 at 1:48 AM
There have been some baseless accusations tossed around that i have too many houseplants, i hope these simple watering instructions and list of locations i’m leaving for my tenant to follow while we’re out of town puts any such allegations to rest.
Finally got my tomatoes cleaned up and my garlic planted and mulched, I am so far behind on everything in my life its hilarious but at least this is one thing done.
December 20, 2025 at 1:34 AM
Finally got my tomatoes cleaned up and my garlic planted and mulched, I am so far behind on everything in my life its hilarious but at least this is one thing done.
The sheer contempt that they have for basically everyone and everything is almost impressive.
December 19, 2025 at 11:46 PM
The sheer contempt that they have for basically everyone and everything is almost impressive.
After many misfires, we finally fully turned on a service I designed with an architecture I am *really* proud of this morning and our integration partner said “okay we’ll be sending you 7000 orders at once” which… was not throughput I was anticipating.
Fuckin handled it like a beast. Boomsauce.
Fuckin handled it like a beast. Boomsauce.
December 18, 2025 at 9:40 PM
After many misfires, we finally fully turned on a service I designed with an architecture I am *really* proud of this morning and our integration partner said “okay we’ll be sending you 7000 orders at once” which… was not throughput I was anticipating.
Fuckin handled it like a beast. Boomsauce.
Fuckin handled it like a beast. Boomsauce.
Reposted by A. Parise
When my grandmother was 9 years old, she and her family lived in Texas and they were extremely poor. She lived with her mother and stepfather and three sisters. My great-grandmother made all their clothes, and they scrimped on everything so that they had enough to eat.
December 15, 2025 at 5:38 AM
When my grandmother was 9 years old, she and her family lived in Texas and they were extremely poor. She lived with her mother and stepfather and three sisters. My great-grandmother made all their clothes, and they scrimped on everything so that they had enough to eat.
This pot only had sinningia in it, and now it’s apparently time to guess what seeded itself into it. I’m… really not sure
December 13, 2025 at 1:31 AM
This pot only had sinningia in it, and now it’s apparently time to guess what seeded itself into it. I’m… really not sure
Spoke too soon, the oven now has two modes, bake and broil. Note the missing “off” mode. I looked at pics and realized i hooked up the switch backwards because of how badly charred the white wires were, I couldn’t actually tell which were white and which were black.
Look at that element glow light red!
HOLY SHIT Y’ALL I ACTUALLY FUCKING FIXED IT!!!!!!!
Now to, uh, finish reassembling it i guess lol
HOLY SHIT Y’ALL I ACTUALLY FUCKING FIXED IT!!!!!!!
Now to, uh, finish reassembling it i guess lol
December 13, 2025 at 12:52 AM
Spoke too soon, the oven now has two modes, bake and broil. Note the missing “off” mode. I looked at pics and realized i hooked up the switch backwards because of how badly charred the white wires were, I couldn’t actually tell which were white and which were black.
Look at that element glow light red!
HOLY SHIT Y’ALL I ACTUALLY FUCKING FIXED IT!!!!!!!
Now to, uh, finish reassembling it i guess lol
HOLY SHIT Y’ALL I ACTUALLY FUCKING FIXED IT!!!!!!!
Now to, uh, finish reassembling it i guess lol
December 12, 2025 at 7:52 PM
Look at that element glow light red!
HOLY SHIT Y’ALL I ACTUALLY FUCKING FIXED IT!!!!!!!
Now to, uh, finish reassembling it i guess lol
HOLY SHIT Y’ALL I ACTUALLY FUCKING FIXED IT!!!!!!!
Now to, uh, finish reassembling it i guess lol
I got access to the toolbox, now i’m onto this fun. Having a grand old time today.
December 12, 2025 at 7:10 PM
I got access to the toolbox, now i’m onto this fun. Having a grand old time today.
I need to get to the toolboxes behind these monstera and at this point I’m tempted to use a machete to do so.
December 12, 2025 at 6:24 PM
I need to get to the toolboxes behind these monstera and at this point I’m tempted to use a machete to do so.
So I guess Trump wants to return us to an 18th century economy? First tarrifs, now piracy in the Caribbean?
December 10, 2025 at 9:15 PM
So I guess Trump wants to return us to an 18th century economy? First tarrifs, now piracy in the Caribbean?
Fucking Forrest fucking Gump.
Absolute trash. I’d watch Requiem again before i watched that waste of film again.
Absolute trash. I’d watch Requiem again before i watched that waste of film again.
Never mind movies you’ve watched multiple times, name a movie you’ve watched once and would never watch again.
December 10, 2025 at 5:53 AM
Fucking Forrest fucking Gump.
Absolute trash. I’d watch Requiem again before i watched that waste of film again.
Absolute trash. I’d watch Requiem again before i watched that waste of film again.
For all my fellow Mountain Goats fans, did you know there are almost 500 live show recordings that are free to download on the internet archive: archive.org/details/Moun...
Internet Archive: Digital Library of Free & Borrowable Texts, Movies, Music & Wayback Machine
archive.org
December 10, 2025 at 5:20 AM
For all my fellow Mountain Goats fans, did you know there are almost 500 live show recordings that are free to download on the internet archive: archive.org/details/Moun...
Reckon i found the bad part in my oven. Think it’ll buff out?
(Since it’s a 1965ish part the shell is bakelite, and man, bakelite Magic Smoke smells so much worse than modern Magic Smoke)
(Since it’s a 1965ish part the shell is bakelite, and man, bakelite Magic Smoke smells so much worse than modern Magic Smoke)
December 10, 2025 at 4:56 AM
Reckon i found the bad part in my oven. Think it’ll buff out?
(Since it’s a 1965ish part the shell is bakelite, and man, bakelite Magic Smoke smells so much worse than modern Magic Smoke)
(Since it’s a 1965ish part the shell is bakelite, and man, bakelite Magic Smoke smells so much worse than modern Magic Smoke)
I don’t know who needs to hear this (aside from my coworker Keith) but STOP POSTING AI GENERATED SUMMARIES OF AI GENERATED VIDEOS IN PUBLIC CHATS IT IS ANTISOCIAL BEHAVIOR.
December 9, 2025 at 5:08 PM
I don’t know who needs to hear this (aside from my coworker Keith) but STOP POSTING AI GENERATED SUMMARIES OF AI GENERATED VIDEOS IN PUBLIC CHATS IT IS ANTISOCIAL BEHAVIOR.
Reposted by A. Parise
NSLU won a $19/hr starting wage for clerks, a massive win in the local grocery industry. Fred Meyer starts at around $17 & non-union New Seasons are at $18 (tho we will see if the company raises those stores). The two sides were FAR away on economics as late as Dec 4.
The power of a strike threat.
The power of a strike threat.
Inbox: New Seasons Labor Union and New Seasons have reached a tentative agreement on a new contract ahead of the union’s December Strike deadline. The TA was unanimously endorsed by the NSLU bargaining committee and endorsed by members attending an All Store meeting last night. Details to come.
December 9, 2025 at 4:32 AM
NSLU won a $19/hr starting wage for clerks, a massive win in the local grocery industry. Fred Meyer starts at around $17 & non-union New Seasons are at $18 (tho we will see if the company raises those stores). The two sides were FAR away on economics as late as Dec 4.
The power of a strike threat.
The power of a strike threat.
Picked up the 7.6M earthquake off Japan this morning from my backyard seismic station. Since it happened so early in the morning the signal is perfect crisp and clear. The earthquake source was 7237km away.
December 8, 2025 at 5:39 PM
Picked up the 7.6M earthquake off Japan this morning from my backyard seismic station. Since it happened so early in the morning the signal is perfect crisp and clear. The earthquake source was 7237km away.
Who’s got two thumbs and had a personal-record-breaking kalamata harvest this year?
👍 this guy👍
👍 this guy👍
December 6, 2025 at 12:49 AM
Who’s got two thumbs and had a personal-record-breaking kalamata harvest this year?
👍 this guy👍
👍 this guy👍
The world just continues getting bleaker by the day.
Soon, CNN will run live odds on world events where its viewers can gamble on them in real time on their smartphones. One recent Kalshi betting market that allowed people to bet on whether Palestinians in Gaza would suffer mass starvation.
CNN Partners With a Gambling App That Lets You Wager on Starvation in Gaza
The app company’s two biggest investors are also heavily invested in the Israeli military.
buff.ly
December 5, 2025 at 9:34 PM
The world just continues getting bleaker by the day.
Well, after a lot of dicking around not knowing what i was doing, i opted for the Extremely Dangerous Oven Diagnostic (with all parts exposed made sure nothing was touching, turned the temp up, dressed in full leather, and turned on the breaker) and now I know what part needs replacement!
December 5, 2025 at 9:31 PM
Well, after a lot of dicking around not knowing what i was doing, i opted for the Extremely Dangerous Oven Diagnostic (with all parts exposed made sure nothing was touching, turned the temp up, dressed in full leather, and turned on the breaker) and now I know what part needs replacement!
Reposted by A. Parise
CAT FOLKS: my friends mom passed unexpectedly and she cannot house her mother's two 8 year old cats Jeeves and Bentley. if you know anyone with a loving home for these 2 please let me know!
December 4, 2025 at 7:31 PM
CAT FOLKS: my friends mom passed unexpectedly and she cannot house her mother's two 8 year old cats Jeeves and Bentley. if you know anyone with a loving home for these 2 please let me know!
I had two different 1:1’s today with two different people and both of them stood me up. No note, no cancelling the meeting, no “oh shit sorry i had to step out” message when i started the meeting… nothing. I am fucking livid.
December 4, 2025 at 10:15 PM
I had two different 1:1’s today with two different people and both of them stood me up. No note, no cancelling the meeting, no “oh shit sorry i had to step out” message when i started the meeting… nothing. I am fucking livid.
I have pretty much hated the piece-of-shit data warehouse Snowflake since i first logged into it, but what’s truly impressive about it is that every month or so when i have to log in to do something, they’ve managed to somehow make it worse EVERY time.
December 4, 2025 at 7:52 PM
I have pretty much hated the piece-of-shit data warehouse Snowflake since i first logged into it, but what’s truly impressive about it is that every month or so when i have to log in to do something, they’ve managed to somehow make it worse EVERY time.