Me
@davidfisher.bsky.social
I struggle to characterize myself with sincerity
Pinned
Me
@davidfisher.bsky.social
· Nov 15
My goal on this platform is to not form any parasocial relationships. Let me know if you're aware of anyone who has good advice on that subject. Or just anything interesting to say. And if you think they'd like to be my friend.
Starting a new religion whose orthodoxy is based not on alleged divine revelations, but on empirical evidence, logical inference, and universal principles of ethics.
It's a non-prophet organization.
It's a non-prophet organization.
November 8, 2025 at 2:13 AM
Starting a new religion whose orthodoxy is based not on alleged divine revelations, but on empirical evidence, logical inference, and universal principles of ethics.
It's a non-prophet organization.
It's a non-prophet organization.
Girth is wasted on the hung
November 4, 2025 at 8:08 AM
Girth is wasted on the hung
Skepticism is healthy - I would argue not accepting new ideas until they've had a chance to be thoroughly tested and confirmed is critically important for society. But I don't expect you to believe that just because I said so.
October 25, 2025 at 8:23 PM
Skepticism is healthy - I would argue not accepting new ideas until they've had a chance to be thoroughly tested and confirmed is critically important for society. But I don't expect you to believe that just because I said so.
Aragorn: Listen, I'm a little worn out from doing king stuff tonight, do you mind if I...
Arwen: ...tag in an army of ghosts again to finish me off? I honestly prefer it at this point.
Arwen: ...tag in an army of ghosts again to finish me off? I honestly prefer it at this point.
October 15, 2025 at 11:48 PM
Aragorn: Listen, I'm a little worn out from doing king stuff tonight, do you mind if I...
Arwen: ...tag in an army of ghosts again to finish me off? I honestly prefer it at this point.
Arwen: ...tag in an army of ghosts again to finish me off? I honestly prefer it at this point.
Vuvuzelas: putting the "kazoo" back in "Shaka Zulu"
October 15, 2025 at 5:00 PM
Vuvuzelas: putting the "kazoo" back in "Shaka Zulu"
I can't believe I never thought of THE LIVESTREAM OF ANNE FRANK as either A. a sketch premise or B. a real situation this dumbest of all timelines would inevitably produce
Thinking about how much of their violence has been normalized already, how scenes that caused shockwaves 6 weeks ago are now part of the rhythm of daily life. Watched a TikTok from a daughter who has to do her parents' laundry & get their groceries because they're in hiding. This is just it now
October 14, 2025 at 6:23 AM
I can't believe I never thought of THE LIVESTREAM OF ANNE FRANK as either A. a sketch premise or B. a real situation this dumbest of all timelines would inevitably produce
When two people are having sex on a bed, does the monster under the bed know what's going up there? Is it freaked out by the shaking? Or is it maybe into it? If so, does its presence technically make it a three-way?
October 14, 2025 at 6:11 AM
When two people are having sex on a bed, does the monster under the bed know what's going up there? Is it freaked out by the shaking? Or is it maybe into it? If so, does its presence technically make it a three-way?
Did Duncan Hunter ever manage to track down and kill a SINGLE Duncan?
October 14, 2025 at 6:02 AM
Did Duncan Hunter ever manage to track down and kill a SINGLE Duncan?
A breezily irreverent take on the Orientalist desert romance subgenre of bodice-ripper, parodic (but surprisingly hardcore):
TONGUE IN SHEIKH
TONGUE IN SHEIKH
October 14, 2025 at 12:46 AM
A breezily irreverent take on the Orientalist desert romance subgenre of bodice-ripper, parodic (but surprisingly hardcore):
TONGUE IN SHEIKH
TONGUE IN SHEIKH
[To the tune of "Santeria"]
🎶 I don't want NonCon or Guro
🎶 Don't show me NTR
🎶 I didn't ask for Scat or Vore
🎶 ...but here we are
🎶 I don't want NonCon or Guro
🎶 Don't show me NTR
🎶 I didn't ask for Scat or Vore
🎶 ...but here we are
October 8, 2025 at 6:46 AM
[To the tune of "Santeria"]
🎶 I don't want NonCon or Guro
🎶 Don't show me NTR
🎶 I didn't ask for Scat or Vore
🎶 ...but here we are
🎶 I don't want NonCon or Guro
🎶 Don't show me NTR
🎶 I didn't ask for Scat or Vore
🎶 ...but here we are
"Sandy Koufax" sounds like a Lady Problem you get after a day at the beach
October 7, 2025 at 5:39 AM
"Sandy Koufax" sounds like a Lady Problem you get after a day at the beach
I have once again been shadowbanned* from all means of public expression** due solely to my boldly controversial*** opinions****
*politely asked to leave
**a Wendy's
***ceaseless and thunderous
****flatulence
*politely asked to leave
**a Wendy's
***ceaseless and thunderous
****flatulence
October 6, 2025 at 3:35 AM
I have once again been shadowbanned* from all means of public expression** due solely to my boldly controversial*** opinions****
*politely asked to leave
**a Wendy's
***ceaseless and thunderous
****flatulence
*politely asked to leave
**a Wendy's
***ceaseless and thunderous
****flatulence
New rock just dropped
This may be one of the greatest days of my life. I just received word from UNLV Dept of Geoscience saying I may have literally actually discovered a rock formation during my desert explorations that's unknown to science. I could not be more excited! This is my childhood dream! (Even if it gets ID'd)
October 3, 2025 at 7:12 AM
New rock just dropped
I saw an interesting documentary about synaesthesia the other day on the radio
September 28, 2025 at 9:07 PM
I saw an interesting documentary about synaesthesia the other day on the radio
Two words you very rarely hear in the same sentence but I have occasion to do so all the time lately: "shat" and "thrice." I shat thrice today, making it thrice this week I've shat thrice in a day.
September 28, 2025 at 5:33 PM
Two words you very rarely hear in the same sentence but I have occasion to do so all the time lately: "shat" and "thrice." I shat thrice today, making it thrice this week I've shat thrice in a day.
"Milestone" looks like it should rhyme with "minestrone"
September 28, 2025 at 5:20 PM
"Milestone" looks like it should rhyme with "minestrone"
The lack of available public restrooms in major cities is a going concern
September 24, 2025 at 7:01 PM
The lack of available public restrooms in major cities is a going concern
Word of advice: before you get too excited about visiting a trap-and-skeet club, be aware most of them actually have next to no femboys OR bukkake.
September 24, 2025 at 4:11 PM
Word of advice: before you get too excited about visiting a trap-and-skeet club, be aware most of them actually have next to no femboys OR bukkake.
#AbsurdlySouthernNames
- Augue Boto
- Buford Pusser
- Gentner Drummond
- Ginger Gooch
- Hudley Crockett
- Jefferson Beauregard Sessions
- Orval Faubus
- Rex Tillerson
- Saxby Chambliss
- States' Rights Gist
- T. Boone Pickens
- Twinkle Andress Cavanaugh
- Willy Dee "Haystacks" Calhoun
- Zell Miller
- Augue Boto
- Buford Pusser
- Gentner Drummond
- Ginger Gooch
- Hudley Crockett
- Jefferson Beauregard Sessions
- Orval Faubus
- Rex Tillerson
- Saxby Chambliss
- States' Rights Gist
- T. Boone Pickens
- Twinkle Andress Cavanaugh
- Willy Dee "Haystacks" Calhoun
- Zell Miller
September 23, 2025 at 4:17 PM
#AbsurdlySouthernNames
- Augue Boto
- Buford Pusser
- Gentner Drummond
- Ginger Gooch
- Hudley Crockett
- Jefferson Beauregard Sessions
- Orval Faubus
- Rex Tillerson
- Saxby Chambliss
- States' Rights Gist
- T. Boone Pickens
- Twinkle Andress Cavanaugh
- Willy Dee "Haystacks" Calhoun
- Zell Miller
- Augue Boto
- Buford Pusser
- Gentner Drummond
- Ginger Gooch
- Hudley Crockett
- Jefferson Beauregard Sessions
- Orval Faubus
- Rex Tillerson
- Saxby Chambliss
- States' Rights Gist
- T. Boone Pickens
- Twinkle Andress Cavanaugh
- Willy Dee "Haystacks" Calhoun
- Zell Miller
When you have those palace intrigues where the concubines are struggling for status and power against the eunuchs, is that considered an Absence-of-a-Dick Measuring Contest?
September 23, 2025 at 6:16 AM
When you have those palace intrigues where the concubines are struggling for status and power against the eunuchs, is that considered an Absence-of-a-Dick Measuring Contest?
Eleven new spiders just dropped
Behold!
Eleven new species of jumping spiders (Araneae, Salticidae) from Sumatra by @kalakemangga.bsky.social
Eleven new species of jumping spiders (Araneae, Salticidae) from Sumatra by @kalakemangga.bsky.social
Eleven new species of jumping spiders (Araneae, Salticidae) from Sumatra
| European Journal of Taxonomy
europeanjournaloftaxonomy.eu
September 22, 2025 at 6:02 PM
Eleven new spiders just dropped
Caterer: So when you said you needed people to "serve spirits" we kinda thought you meant alcohol
Necromancer: This is Xa'arthas the Unvanquished
Xa'arthas the Unvanquished: I SEE BEYOND MORTAL TIME
Necromancer: He'll have an Old Fashioned
Xa'arthas the Unvanquished: WISCONSIN STYLE
Necromancer: This is Xa'arthas the Unvanquished
Xa'arthas the Unvanquished: I SEE BEYOND MORTAL TIME
Necromancer: He'll have an Old Fashioned
Xa'arthas the Unvanquished: WISCONSIN STYLE
September 20, 2025 at 5:19 AM
Caterer: So when you said you needed people to "serve spirits" we kinda thought you meant alcohol
Necromancer: This is Xa'arthas the Unvanquished
Xa'arthas the Unvanquished: I SEE BEYOND MORTAL TIME
Necromancer: He'll have an Old Fashioned
Xa'arthas the Unvanquished: WISCONSIN STYLE
Necromancer: This is Xa'arthas the Unvanquished
Xa'arthas the Unvanquished: I SEE BEYOND MORTAL TIME
Necromancer: He'll have an Old Fashioned
Xa'arthas the Unvanquished: WISCONSIN STYLE
Reposted by Me
Just a reminder that Madison has an incredible resource in @4starvideo.bsky.social, which has an easy DVD subscription plan (they have lots of TV shows too), and a Madison Public Library card gets you access to both physical media rentals and the free Kanopy streaming service, which is pretty good!
September 18, 2025 at 3:44 PM
Just a reminder that Madison has an incredible resource in @4starvideo.bsky.social, which has an easy DVD subscription plan (they have lots of TV shows too), and a Madison Public Library card gets you access to both physical media rentals and the free Kanopy streaming service, which is pretty good!
Muppet Rappers:
- Big Boid
- Lil' Kermit
- Miss Piggy Elliot
- Elmo Elmo Cool J
- Oscar the Creator
- 2 Chains! Ah ha ha!
- Ol' Fozzie Bearstard
- Del, the Funky Snuffleupagus
- Dr. Dre and the Electric Mayhem
- Big Boid
- Lil' Kermit
- Miss Piggy Elliot
- Elmo Elmo Cool J
- Oscar the Creator
- 2 Chains! Ah ha ha!
- Ol' Fozzie Bearstard
- Del, the Funky Snuffleupagus
- Dr. Dre and the Electric Mayhem
September 17, 2025 at 7:23 AM
Muppet Rappers:
- Big Boid
- Lil' Kermit
- Miss Piggy Elliot
- Elmo Elmo Cool J
- Oscar the Creator
- 2 Chains! Ah ha ha!
- Ol' Fozzie Bearstard
- Del, the Funky Snuffleupagus
- Dr. Dre and the Electric Mayhem
- Big Boid
- Lil' Kermit
- Miss Piggy Elliot
- Elmo Elmo Cool J
- Oscar the Creator
- 2 Chains! Ah ha ha!
- Ol' Fozzie Bearstard
- Del, the Funky Snuffleupagus
- Dr. Dre and the Electric Mayhem
Me: I smell peanut butter
Grandma: I made cookies
Me: These aren't peanut butter cookies, these are lizard September
Grandma: I maple grief the how landing mended
My Brain Surgeon: Welp. I definitely wasn't supposed to cut there
Me: I taste copper
Grandma: I made cookies
Me: These aren't peanut butter cookies, these are lizard September
Grandma: I maple grief the how landing mended
My Brain Surgeon: Welp. I definitely wasn't supposed to cut there
Me: I taste copper
September 16, 2025 at 7:07 AM
Me: I smell peanut butter
Grandma: I made cookies
Me: These aren't peanut butter cookies, these are lizard September
Grandma: I maple grief the how landing mended
My Brain Surgeon: Welp. I definitely wasn't supposed to cut there
Me: I taste copper
Grandma: I made cookies
Me: These aren't peanut butter cookies, these are lizard September
Grandma: I maple grief the how landing mended
My Brain Surgeon: Welp. I definitely wasn't supposed to cut there
Me: I taste copper