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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃
@daverson.bsky.social
1.9K followers 930 following 37K posts
hey did i ever tell you hwut 🏳️‍🌈 You can be yourself with me 🏳️‍⚧️ Nunquam libertas gratior extat banner by @macnult.com
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · Apr 25
a brick wall with some graffiti. over the entirety of the wall someone has spray painted "JESUS - NO NAME IS HIGHER" above that someone else spray painted "dave"
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 10h
tonight, on History Channel's new show MUSTACHE WARS, jimmy-bob's rogue nose hair disrupts the competition. TV-13
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 11h
welcome back
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 11h
real housewives of bumfuck nowhere
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 11h
he can simply manifest just his dick right in front of you
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 12h
swanky jernt, they got mints on the coke mirror in the shithouse.
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 12h
NEXT STOP ALTOOOOOOOOOOONA
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 12h
"is he your best man?"

"no, but he's my very best boy"
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 13h
the messiah
daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 14h
ham sauce? when you have perfectly good pineapple jam in the refrigerator?

lol no any sauce is good sauce
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 15h
pee biengé
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 15h
feed them to a pig and then eat the pig
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 16h
the kids are gonna miss that goldfish.

rip pooprope, we love you
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 16h
I need help, I'm on fire!" Woman on fire yes, that's an actual quote as published on the news https://www.wwlp.com/news/crime/west-springfield-woman-saves-neighbor-who-caught-on-fire/
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 18h
picking the white bits out of the mortadella and selling the pink part to food influencers as "swiss baloney"
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 19h
that tracks, new england, canada & scotland have similarly cold climates & similar attitudes lol
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 19h
this kind of shit is why ⅔ of the planet hated us even before the pumpkin king
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 19h
they send 2 american teams to play with each other. the NFL is very fashie-adjacent so this is 🇺🇸 chest-beating as much as it is an athletic show
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 19h
my phone autocorrects "twat" to "test" for some cryptic SwiftKey reason, which means i need to use the word "twat" more often
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 19h
to my UK m8s, there was an american football game there today. is NFL football popular there or is it mostly american tourists & cgi crowds?
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 19h
my sympathies. we've dealt with "mental health issues" in our family as well.

the cards? well...my kid has a big collection going way back. she says, "it's shiny rectangles. the value is fake; when the bubble bursts, i'll have what i've always had: shiny rectangles."
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 20h
thos twats never have my size
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 20h
who?
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 20h
there's a nor'easter rolling up this way & it's gonna be wild tonight i guess, so i'm logging on to local news/weather websites, posting pictures of shit just doin nothing outside on every one, & captioning all of them "CALM BEFORE THE STORM" so if you're looking for the asshole responsible, it's me
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 20h
someday it will. you'll see. 🫂
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daverson.bsky.social
dave 🎃 @daverson.bsky.social · 21h
nope. just me and mrs d, 41 years this month 🤵🫶👰
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