Author | Lightnews

Buddy Beaver

@buddybeaver.bsky.social

290 followers 150 following 650 posts

Smol sentient plastic beaver. Figurines designed and made in Canada. Will be available for purchase eventually. Probably.

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Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 6h

Even afterwards there should be a memorial plaque to commemorate The Epstein Ballroom.

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 7h

Gaudy Rococo garbage.

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 7h

I thought his forever home was six feet under a golf course beside his one ex-wife?

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Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 7h

Destroying landmarks and dumping shit on golf courses, that’s pretty on-brand for trump.

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 7h

They stopped giving him the ‘Buy Two Keys, Get One Free’ deal, so he’s upset.

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 8h

What a fantastic coincidence! How lucky that he got the contract without any inside dealing! What are the odds?

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 8h

When can we expect a third Deuce Bigalow movie to complete the trilogy? Those films were the most intelligent works Rob Schneider has ever done.

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 8h

Same to you my friend.

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 8h

Is this the same Fox News who brings on Paul Fromm as a guest expert on free speech, but forgets to mention that he’s Canada’s most infamous neonazi? I’m shocked.

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 8h

An ice cream sandwich still counts as a sandwich.

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 8h

I doubt Don Jr would allow them to blow up some perfectly snortable yayo before he’s had a quick toot.

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 8h

That was under a Democrat administration, so any number would be considered horrible. Luckily, under the GOP, inflation could hit triple digits and it’s fine, anyone who says otherwise is just TDS or woke wackjobs or antifa or something….

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 8h

I’m just guessing here, but when she says ‘faith’ she isn’t talking about Islam, is she?

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 8h

It’s no different from the American invasion of Granada in 1983. They’re putting Latin America on notice that they must submit to trump’s will, or this is what will happen to you.

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 8h

Imagine if the President’s daughter in law tried to release an unauthorized cover of a Tom Petty song and was told not to by Tom Petty’s estate, but just went ahead and did it anyway. That would be so unimaginable, it would never ever happen….😉

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 13h

It would be a shame if there were hundreds of other countries for Canada to trade with. Oh, wait a minute…..

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 13h

Who would have ever thought that Deuce Bigalow would say something stupid?

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 13h

Cracker Barrel has been a part of American culture for hundreds of years, since 1969.

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 13h

Wait, so the vaccine doesn’t cause TurboCancer™️ like facebook says?

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 16h

My family farm graveyard had an awful lot of children’s graves. I wonder if they were just burying healthy children for the fun of it?

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 20h

That would destroy the economy, which is being artificially held up by fraud.

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 20h

I suspect this news will cause trump to order the demolition of the West Wing in frustration.

Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 20h

He’s realizing that trump’s bunker doesn’t have room for him to hide from the mobs.

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Buddy Beaver @buddybeaver.bsky.social · 20h

Sounds like a sanitized version of the Heritage Front to me.