tessa 🧸
@uncleappa.bsky.social
Lesbian | aspiring butch | purveyor of “I love my wife” content | she/they
After the anxiety spiked and I became the meanest person alive for .06 seconds
November 28, 2025 at 6:42 PM
After the anxiety spiked and I became the meanest person alive for .06 seconds
Who up shaking ass to Patsy Cline
November 27, 2025 at 10:10 PM
Who up shaking ass to Patsy Cline
How can I tell my dog that her tummy only hurts because she didn’t eat her breakfast when MY tummy hurts because I didn’t eat my breakfast?
November 25, 2025 at 3:46 PM
How can I tell my dog that her tummy only hurts because she didn’t eat her breakfast when MY tummy hurts because I didn’t eat my breakfast?
Thinking about her………
November 24, 2025 at 8:27 PM
Thinking about her………
Getting lovingly clocked is my favorite experience (the barista knew I wanted oat milk) 💖
November 23, 2025 at 4:09 PM
Getting lovingly clocked is my favorite experience (the barista knew I wanted oat milk) 💖
Do you ever love your friends just like so much?
November 23, 2025 at 2:29 AM
Do you ever love your friends just like so much?
What if I told you I was right to stay home because a couple reportedly refused to leave the theater for even one moment to change their infant’s poopy diaper. They did it on a table! For eating! Right next to my wife!! Who does that!! Parents’ rights or whatever but that’s bathroom stuff mama!!
Good luck!! I told my wife she GETS to enjoy a solo date with herself at the movies tomorrow
November 21, 2025 at 11:16 PM
What if I told you I was right to stay home because a couple reportedly refused to leave the theater for even one moment to change their infant’s poopy diaper. They did it on a table! For eating! Right next to my wife!! Who does that!! Parents’ rights or whatever but that’s bathroom stuff mama!!
Moments before she tried to punch me in the face for giving her too many kisses 😔
November 21, 2025 at 5:39 PM
Moments before she tried to punch me in the face for giving her too many kisses 😔
How dare the algorithm catch on to my brand like this…
November 19, 2025 at 3:53 PM
How dare the algorithm catch on to my brand like this…
Isn’t anxiety amazing? I was able to single-handedly give 20 people whiplash this weekend. Superpower!!
November 17, 2025 at 1:57 PM
Isn’t anxiety amazing? I was able to single-handedly give 20 people whiplash this weekend. Superpower!!
What if we just stopped playing christmas music what if we decided to free ourselves from that shit what if
November 15, 2025 at 8:16 PM
What if we just stopped playing christmas music what if we decided to free ourselves from that shit what if
gonna be eating muff all weekend
November 14, 2025 at 4:20 PM
gonna be eating muff all weekend
Life is all about second chances
November 13, 2025 at 3:51 PM
Life is all about second chances
Today’s biggest regret? My wife offered to get me an egg sandwich on our morning walk. I said no?? Now all I want is an egg sandwich. She gave me so many chances to change my mind smh
This is your sign to marry someone who knows you better than you know yourself and to always trust they’re RIGHT
This is your sign to marry someone who knows you better than you know yourself and to always trust they’re RIGHT
November 12, 2025 at 6:24 PM
Today’s biggest regret? My wife offered to get me an egg sandwich on our morning walk. I said no?? Now all I want is an egg sandwich. She gave me so many chances to change my mind smh
This is your sign to marry someone who knows you better than you know yourself and to always trust they’re RIGHT
This is your sign to marry someone who knows you better than you know yourself and to always trust they’re RIGHT
Screaming into the void in 10 minutes. Be there or be square!!
November 11, 2025 at 2:46 PM
Screaming into the void in 10 minutes. Be there or be square!!
Anyone else’s dog go on hunger strike and subsequently fart the house down after two days?
November 9, 2025 at 2:02 PM
Anyone else’s dog go on hunger strike and subsequently fart the house down after two days?
Chat cats? This is my Moe. Momo, The Moe, Big Girl, Dr. Moe, Coach Moe. I know I’ve posted her before, but she’s my soul kitty!! I have to post more Moe! She’s full of whatever special ingredient makes tabby cats so unassumingly perfect. I’m gonna cry thinking about how much I love her please enjoy
November 8, 2025 at 1:38 PM
Chat cats? This is my Moe. Momo, The Moe, Big Girl, Dr. Moe, Coach Moe. I know I’ve posted her before, but she’s my soul kitty!! I have to post more Moe! She’s full of whatever special ingredient makes tabby cats so unassumingly perfect. I’m gonna cry thinking about how much I love her please enjoy
Cursed year continues with a big couple of weeks at our house!!
-dryer broke
-car 2 broke down. $2000 fix. Car 1 still hasn’t been repaired and can’t drive in rain
-out of pocket dental work
-wife’s phone got a little water on it and broke even though it’s supposed to be water resistant
-dryer broke
-car 2 broke down. $2000 fix. Car 1 still hasn’t been repaired and can’t drive in rain
-out of pocket dental work
-wife’s phone got a little water on it and broke even though it’s supposed to be water resistant
November 7, 2025 at 2:34 PM
Cursed year continues with a big couple of weeks at our house!!
-dryer broke
-car 2 broke down. $2000 fix. Car 1 still hasn’t been repaired and can’t drive in rain
-out of pocket dental work
-wife’s phone got a little water on it and broke even though it’s supposed to be water resistant
-dryer broke
-car 2 broke down. $2000 fix. Car 1 still hasn’t been repaired and can’t drive in rain
-out of pocket dental work
-wife’s phone got a little water on it and broke even though it’s supposed to be water resistant
Love having muffins in the house so I can make a bunch of jokes about eating muff life is good
November 6, 2025 at 2:17 PM
Love having muffins in the house so I can make a bunch of jokes about eating muff life is good
Isn’t it funny how big money stuff always comes crashing down all at the same time? Funny!!
November 5, 2025 at 6:36 PM
Isn’t it funny how big money stuff always comes crashing down all at the same time? Funny!!
Conveniently forgetting an 8:30 meeting because I can’t set any expectations that I’d ever be available for that kind of thing 🙂↔️
November 4, 2025 at 3:49 PM
Conveniently forgetting an 8:30 meeting because I can’t set any expectations that I’d ever be available for that kind of thing 🙂↔️
I really love when a man assumes I’m so stupid I don’t even know my office’s phone number. The office I have been working at for 8.5 years 🙂
November 3, 2025 at 8:49 PM
I really love when a man assumes I’m so stupid I don’t even know my office’s phone number. The office I have been working at for 8.5 years 🙂
I was talking about Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez with my wife today and called her Ao3 by accident probably 10 times. How rotted is my brain
November 2, 2025 at 9:26 PM
I was talking about Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez with my wife today and called her Ao3 by accident probably 10 times. How rotted is my brain
Time for my daily commute through the “confident and bold” to “I need to talk less” pipeline
November 1, 2025 at 2:08 PM
Time for my daily commute through the “confident and bold” to “I need to talk less” pipeline