Author | Lightnews

tessa 🧸

tessa 🧸

@uncleappa.bsky.social

210 followers 210 following 580 posts

Lesbian | aspiring butch | purveyor of “I love my wife” content | she/they

Posts Media Videos Starter Packs

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 2h

“Hate cringe lines” as though you’re not laughing when you serve my jokes a court-mandated NO reaction

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 17h

But what if I told you the truth is that everybody likes you?? What then!!!! 💕

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 20h

Me wiping away those pesky Giant Winter Ants 🤗🤗🤗

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 23h

🫂🫂🫂

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 23h

I am her (for pizza), she is me (for pizza)

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 1d

Thinking about the time the pizza place misheard my name and forever made me Peffa in their ordering system

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 1d

Cats are the best trainers!! My Moe is in the gym with me every day!! Trying to make me drop dumbbells and/or topple over 😌

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 1d

Maybe not what you had in mind, but I get so annoyed pushing a suitcase around. I’ve been carrying this backpack for 11 years! Fits really well in the overhead, even under the seat in a pinch. Has a surprising amount of room/organization space for a week+ of clothes

www.osprey.com/sojourn-port...

Sojourn Porter 46L - Stylish Capable Durable Carry-On - Travel Pack

Part of the stylishly capable Sojourn Family of travel packs and luggage, the Sojourn Porter 46L is a true traveler's workhorse that maximizes storage space and comfort for carry-on convenience.

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 2d

Planning a ~10yr college ukulele club reunion?? Crying in old and cringe and friendship 😭

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 2d

Sending so much love to you and maeby!!!! ❤️‍🩹

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 2d

When the stylist gets out the diffuser to hold me hostage in sensory hell for 20 minutes

Bette Porter screaming “TINA!!!!!!”

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 2d

The audacity of this?? It’s like they came up with the shitty no kings read first and *needed* an outlet to say it

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 2d

Forever beefing with the torture device otherwise known as the blow dryer

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 3d

Today it was the bridge of Nobody’s Son. For context, towel time is when we spray her with dog perfume and dry her off. It’s a whole production, and she loves it.

She’s so brave n tuff! 👏
Walkin’ even though it’s rainy!
She’s a stinky pup 👏👏
That’s why we do towel time baby!

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 3d

When your dog faces her fear of rain for a morning walk, you are obligated to sing her a personalized song to the tune of whatever’s stuck in your head

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 4d

I can’t stop thinking about this. I bet she’s never hungover. Absolutely brilliant

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 5d

I got approval to share!! If you want to watch, DM me!! (Buffy yours is incoming dw)

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 5d

The only version I can share has everyone’s full names, and I don’t love sharing that on super public bsky… checking to see what we can do about that!! 💖

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 5d

We just found out we made it to the regional awards, but we were never notified?? Anyway turns out I’m a star and everyone loved our silly little movie 😭

A snippet of an email from the film fest regional organizer to my film team’s leader that reads:

“You won the Audience Award and Tessa won Supporting Actress! Congrats, people were cracking up watching your film at the best of screening. Loved the film! I have your two awards, so we’ll have to find a time to meet up so you can collect your hardware.”

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 5d

Sensodyne, my favorite snack

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 6d

it’s stressful

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 6d

Oh wow that's almost basically Cleveland!!

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 7d

Going to a new coffee shop is a gamble because it’s either going to be the gayest or the most Christian space you’ll be in that day

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 7d

No love language speaks louder than “little treats”

tessa 🧸 @uncleappa.bsky.social · 7d

Casting a spell for the perfect blend of crisp and tart amen 🕯️