How do you like your coffee?

Hockey isn’t boring.

Where to begin

Lie, lie, lie, and then lie some more.

Roses are red,
Cherenkov radiation is blue…

I wish I could just snap my fingers and fix everything for you. I really do.

Fun fact: police have no legal duty to protect anyone.

I think there are only like 3 law PhD programs here: Berkeley (jurisprudence and social policy), Yale, and University of Washington.

Does #lawsky know of any other law PhD programs here in the US?

It must be nice being perfect.

What an ugly fucking flower.

Average people think they’re smart, and most lawyers are average. Not all, for sure, because I know some truly brilliant lawyers.

But every attorney I’ve ever provided contract services to has at least said my talent is extraordinary.

The only ones who don’t like it aren’t paying me.

Statistically speaking, I’m probably the most intelligent person you’ll ever speak with.

But do go on—I love it when people call me stupid.

Do you even know what that term means? It seems like you don’t.

Some of us aren’t annoying extroverts who need morning to come quickly so we can hunt for narcissistic supply, which requires the targets be awake.