We built a calculator that doesn't work, but don't worry, it's also a plagiarism machine that will tell you to kill yourself. It runs on the world's oceans and costs 10 trillion dollars.

We can upload 3 minute videos now.

YOU KNOW THE RULE

We don’t hear much about the West Pole, where Cowboy Santa lives. Probably because of all the people he’s shot

Drake right now

Shit's fucked

Renew Scavengers Reign, you cowards

My kingdom for a set of bowls, forks, and spoons that have the exact same curve

A weird thing about being online is you’ll get a notification that someone named “feral weirdo” follows you and you’ll go ah good a normal person, and then you’ll get a notification that someone named “Professor Thomas Smith” follows you and you’ll think oh no a weirdo

Can't imagine the youth will be too bummed about their high energy video app being banned when they can just log onto blue sky and read sentences written by elder millennials

We're making all your websites shitty and evil. What are you gonna do, log off and spend time with your family

Strawberry Shortcake: My friends and I are having a tea party!

Rainbow Brite: I am a god at war with the concept of sorrow.

Gimme the beef boys and some guacamol
Wanna get lost in this taco bowl

every new restaurant in every major city is either called Thistle+Thorn and thinks adding turmeric to brussel sprouts makes them worth $30 or is called Burger Bitch and has a neon sign in the window that says “im gonna fuck a hamburger”

“bluesky is an echo chamber” the echo is sanity.

Bluer skies, greener pastures