Mel_issues
banner
mel-issues.bsky.social
Mel_issues
@mel-issues.bsky.social
I’ve got 99 issues & math is all of them.
Fluent in Dogs~ADHD~FinOps~Spreadsheets
YSJ, NB
It’s not filled, sanded or stained yet - but such an improvement from the brick 😂
December 8, 2025 at 11:37 AM
I’m losing years off my life right now. Let’s go.
November 1, 2025 at 2:41 AM
When you were trained in scent detection with wintergreen & your Mother has wintergreen flavoured cough drops, you hit your mark and patiently wait for your reward.
October 28, 2025 at 7:27 PM
I’ve always wanted to visit FallingWater (a Frank Lloyd Wright masterpiece) so really hoping it withstands the fall of the USA & so I get to see it in my lifetime.
October 13, 2025 at 11:16 AM
I refuse to turn on the heat, so my fingers refuse to work under such conditions. Thank god for Little Hotties - these spreadsheets aren’t going to build themselves.
October 1, 2025 at 5:46 PM
The size of the bag of peanuts & the amount of time I spend communicating with my woodland friends after work is directly proportional to how draining my work day was.

This is Tony. Tony cleans up & can feed his family for a year from one day of work stress 😂
September 30, 2025 at 10:23 AM
I’m so petty & spiteful, I’m trading in my Toyota for ANY OTHER make so long as the dealership provides transportation when your vehicle is being serviced & doesn’t give you attitude when you try to schedule the customer service shuttle for pick up. Complaining about YOU, SJ Toyota.
August 30, 2025 at 4:28 PM
My extra long weekend plans include learning to use my new paddle board, putting away the majority of my summer clothes (the juxtaposition,rly) and convincing my spouse a 3rd dog would preemptively cure my impending SAD.
August 29, 2025 at 9:33 AM
I would like to pay someone to come group & hang all of my thrifted art because I get overwhelmed with themes and if gallery walls should “match” and I really just need to hang my new creepy vintage child & GSD’s picture but I’m paralyzed with indecision 😂
August 16, 2025 at 10:19 AM
The next time we patrol uptown, think I’ll bring his toy to send a message to men that we’re both unfriendly & they should not attempt talk to us.
August 9, 2025 at 11:48 PM
Pool Pawty time
August 2, 2025 at 3:50 PM
Sir Francis Barkon is 7 today!
All he wants for his birthday is for me to put the camera down & throw the damn ball already.
August 2, 2025 at 10:23 AM
Called ahead and reserved the beach for us this morning.
July 26, 2025 at 11:11 AM
My supervisors for the day
July 12, 2025 at 9:21 PM
I made several trips back to the ice corridor to hang with my penguin friends & cool down. Then laughed at how I spent as much time as possible in the tropical section and so little with the penguins when I was a youth 😂
July 9, 2025 at 12:45 PM
I don’t know why they call them German Shedders- They only shed 2x a year*

*Each shed lasts approximately 6 months. #GSD #GermanShedder
July 6, 2025 at 2:02 AM
I’ve been herding cats (sprint planning) since I got home from my run at 7am. I haven’t internet-ed yet today & it seems I have a lot of stuff to catch up on….
June 13, 2025 at 8:41 PM
I’d like to retire now so I can continue to cosplay Snow White but on a permanent, full time basis.
June 11, 2025 at 9:23 PM
Could I interest you in our sarcastic travel sign we use for exactly such scoldings? Typically used for international travel, but when feeling spicy, I don’t hesitate to use it locally 😂
June 6, 2025 at 11:20 AM
I feel god in this Chilli’s tonight.
June 5, 2025 at 5:29 AM
Made it.
June 3, 2025 at 10:52 PM
Sorry, I WOULD make dinner, but I’m trapped under my 85 pound weighted blanket. 🤷🏻‍♀️
May 23, 2025 at 10:25 PM
It’s not a betrayal if he can’t read.
May 16, 2025 at 10:23 PM
“I don’t want to alarm anyone, but it’s been approximately 20 seconds since she got the treat out & hasn’t given it to me yet. Call the authorities.”
~Benny Beans
May 13, 2025 at 8:19 PM
Watching season 3 of White Lotus is doing NOTHING to quiet my urge to go back to Thailand. Next time, I need 3 months there instead of 3 weeks.
April 13, 2025 at 5:47 PM