Mel_issues
@mel-issues.bsky.social
I’ve got 99 issues & math is all of them.
Fluent in Dogs~ADHD~FinOps~Spreadsheets
YSJ, NB
Fluent in Dogs~ADHD~FinOps~Spreadsheets
YSJ, NB
It’s almost like everyone at work is unaware that I’m finished for the year in 3 business days and that every problem they bring to me is officially a January problem.
a woman says please bore someone else with your questions .
Alt: a woman says please bore someone else with your questions .
media.tenor.com
December 9, 2025 at 8:28 PM
It’s almost like everyone at work is unaware that I’m finished for the year in 3 business days and that every problem they bring to me is officially a January problem.
Using my own tools & my own design, I built a fireplace mantle to cover up the existing brick mantle from the 70s that I’ve hated for the last 14 years. I even trimmed it out to enclose it & appear like a solid beam.
Basically, I’m a master craftsman.
Basically, I’m a master craftsman.
a woman wearing an orange vest and holding a green helmet
Alt: a woman wearing an orange vest and holding a green helmet builds stands next to the mantle she built inviting everyone in her home to admire her craftsmanships
media.tenor.com
December 7, 2025 at 10:54 AM
Using my own tools & my own design, I built a fireplace mantle to cover up the existing brick mantle from the 70s that I’ve hated for the last 14 years. I even trimmed it out to enclose it & appear like a solid beam.
Basically, I’m a master craftsman.
Basically, I’m a master craftsman.
There is no professional horror quite like being on a video call with your BIGGEST vendor while drinking coffee and realizing mid gulp that you’re not using your plain, white coffee mug and instead, are using your FFFfffuck coffee mug.
a man in a suit is drinking from a cup that says ' mrs. pepper ' on it
ALT: a man in a suit is drinking from a cup that says ' mrs. pepper ' on it
media.tenor.com
December 3, 2025 at 4:11 PM
There is no professional horror quite like being on a video call with your BIGGEST vendor while drinking coffee and realizing mid gulp that you’re not using your plain, white coffee mug and instead, are using your FFFfffuck coffee mug.
Only 9 business days left of my work year. I can do it!
Well, maybe I can do it. I have doubts.
Well, maybe I can do it. I have doubts.
a man in a suit and tie says all i can do right now is put on a brave face .
Alt: a man in a suit and tie says all i can do right now is put on a brave face .
media.tenor.com
December 2, 2025 at 5:48 PM
Only 9 business days left of my work year. I can do it!
Well, maybe I can do it. I have doubts.
Well, maybe I can do it. I have doubts.
I just really want to pet a bear.
November 29, 2025 at 12:41 PM
I just really want to pet a bear.
About to enter the 5th circle of hell (aka Walmart) on a Friday night without my emotional support adult.
Send thoughts & prayers. Better yet, bail money.
Send thoughts & prayers. Better yet, bail money.
November 28, 2025 at 10:39 PM
About to enter the 5th circle of hell (aka Walmart) on a Friday night without my emotional support adult.
Send thoughts & prayers. Better yet, bail money.
Send thoughts & prayers. Better yet, bail money.
My sister & I went absolutely feral* on our Halifax weekend get away.
*If feral means PJs by 5pm on Saturday night, then eating 2 gummies, Dominos, and watching 3 consecutive Hallmark Christmas movies in the silence of your hotel room without so’s offering their film critiques 😂
*If feral means PJs by 5pm on Saturday night, then eating 2 gummies, Dominos, and watching 3 consecutive Hallmark Christmas movies in the silence of your hotel room without so’s offering their film critiques 😂
a woman says the girls are girling with her hands
Alt: a woman says the girls are girling with her hands
media.tenor.com
November 23, 2025 at 11:33 AM
My sister & I went absolutely feral* on our Halifax weekend get away.
*If feral means PJs by 5pm on Saturday night, then eating 2 gummies, Dominos, and watching 3 consecutive Hallmark Christmas movies in the silence of your hotel room without so’s offering their film critiques 😂
*If feral means PJs by 5pm on Saturday night, then eating 2 gummies, Dominos, and watching 3 consecutive Hallmark Christmas movies in the silence of your hotel room without so’s offering their film critiques 😂
I was all about getting away for the weekend until I realized I signed myself up to be the driver and didn’t invite my usual chauffeur.
a man in a suit and tie is driving a car while smoking a cigarette
Alt: a man in a suit and tie is driving a car while smoking a cigarette
media.tenor.com
November 21, 2025 at 11:49 AM
I was all about getting away for the weekend until I realized I signed myself up to be the driver and didn’t invite my usual chauffeur.
Apple fitness Running would be much better if they included video. Run Madrid? No visual of your route- just guided audio talking about the route. Thanks- I’ll stick to YouTube when I want some adventure running from my treadmill
a cartoon apple is jumping a jump rope in the grass
Alt: a rotten apple is jumping a jump rope in the grass
media.tenor.com
November 17, 2025 at 11:12 AM
Apple fitness Running would be much better if they included video. Run Madrid? No visual of your route- just guided audio talking about the route. Thanks- I’ll stick to YouTube when I want some adventure running from my treadmill
To whoever has been running the leaf blower for the past 4 hours straight while I’m math-ing and forecasting - please stop and take a break. It’s a matter of your personal safety at this point.
a close up of a man 's face with the words " you are in danger "
ALT: a close up of a man 's face with the words " you are in danger "
media.tenor.com
November 14, 2025 at 5:24 PM
To whoever has been running the leaf blower for the past 4 hours straight while I’m math-ing and forecasting - please stop and take a break. It’s a matter of your personal safety at this point.
“You’re taking 3 weeks off in December. You can do this!” She whispers as she wills herself to roll off her couch and walk the 10 steps into her office.
I am she. She is me.
I am she. She is me.
a man in a suit and tie with the words you 've entered the burnout zone
Alt: a man in a suit and tie with the words you 've entered the burnout zone
media.tenor.com
November 13, 2025 at 11:52 AM
“You’re taking 3 weeks off in December. You can do this!” She whispers as she wills herself to roll off her couch and walk the 10 steps into her office.
I am she. She is me.
I am she. She is me.
Does anyone own a Cozey brand Ciello sofa or ever sat on one? I need an honest, unbiased review. So far, I can only find reviews from Canadian influencers who were gifted couches…
November 10, 2025 at 5:24 PM
Does anyone own a Cozey brand Ciello sofa or ever sat on one? I need an honest, unbiased review. So far, I can only find reviews from Canadian influencers who were gifted couches…
Today’s Mantra:
I do not need a Burnese Mountain Dog. I do not need another GSD. I do not need another Golden. My vacuum cleaner will simply pass away if I bring home another long haired shedder.
But wait- what if I just bought an even more powerful, industrial vacuum to add to the fleet??
I do not need a Burnese Mountain Dog. I do not need another GSD. I do not need another Golden. My vacuum cleaner will simply pass away if I bring home another long haired shedder.
But wait- what if I just bought an even more powerful, industrial vacuum to add to the fleet??
a woman is making a funny face while looking at the camera .
Alt: A woman talks herself out of getting more animals but then considers simply buying a better vacuum instead
media.tenor.com
November 8, 2025 at 11:56 AM
Today’s Mantra:
I do not need a Burnese Mountain Dog. I do not need another GSD. I do not need another Golden. My vacuum cleaner will simply pass away if I bring home another long haired shedder.
But wait- what if I just bought an even more powerful, industrial vacuum to add to the fleet??
I do not need a Burnese Mountain Dog. I do not need another GSD. I do not need another Golden. My vacuum cleaner will simply pass away if I bring home another long haired shedder.
But wait- what if I just bought an even more powerful, industrial vacuum to add to the fleet??
Now every time I go to Costco and successfully get into my own vehicle (on the first attempt)- I buy myself a little treat.
a man in a red shirt says i deserve a treat on snl
ALT: a man in a red shirt says i deserve a treat on snl
media.tenor.com
November 7, 2025 at 10:10 PM
Now every time I go to Costco and successfully get into my own vehicle (on the first attempt)- I buy myself a little treat.
I got up super early to work a couple of extra hours because I inherited a role with a lot of bad data. I’m still sitting on my couch trying to will myself to actually work. I think the couch is winning.
an orange and white cat is standing on a gray couch
Alt: an orange and white cat is sinking into a gray couch
media.tenor.com
November 5, 2025 at 11:46 AM
I got up super early to work a couple of extra hours because I inherited a role with a lot of bad data. I’m still sitting on my couch trying to will myself to actually work. I think the couch is winning.
I’m losing years off my life right now. Let’s go.
November 1, 2025 at 2:41 AM
I’m losing years off my life right now. Let’s go.
Being in the World Series is exhausting so I hope my work is understanding of my lack of performance for the next 2 days.
snow white from snow white and the seven dwarfs is drinking coffee from a coffee pot .
ALT: snow white from snow white and the seven dwarfs is drinking coffee from a coffee pot .
media.tenor.com
October 30, 2025 at 11:11 AM
Being in the World Series is exhausting so I hope my work is understanding of my lack of performance for the next 2 days.
When you were trained in scent detection with wintergreen & your Mother has wintergreen flavoured cough drops, you hit your mark and patiently wait for your reward.
October 28, 2025 at 7:27 PM
When you were trained in scent detection with wintergreen & your Mother has wintergreen flavoured cough drops, you hit your mark and patiently wait for your reward.
Teams is NOT the vehicle to ask me a “quick question” that will take me 2 years of law school + 2 more years to explain the answer.
October 28, 2025 at 3:15 PM
Teams is NOT the vehicle to ask me a “quick question” that will take me 2 years of law school + 2 more years to explain the answer.
Is that Colonel Sanders sitting behind home plate?
October 26, 2025 at 12:18 AM
Is that Colonel Sanders sitting behind home plate?
I’m not a forensic accountant but I play one at work 🙄
a man is sitting at a table with bottles of beer and a receipt on a printer .
ALT: a man is sitting at a table with bottles of beer and a receipt on a printer .
media.tenor.com
October 24, 2025 at 6:21 PM
I’m not a forensic accountant but I play one at work 🙄
I do not feel that my coworkers are sufficiently excited about what went down last night. So today, I will be taking 5 minutes out of every meeting to recap it for them.
a blue jays baseball player stands in front of a pizza hut ad
ALT: a blue jays baseball player stands in front of a pizza hut ad
media.tenor.com
October 21, 2025 at 12:41 PM
I do not feel that my coworkers are sufficiently excited about what went down last night. So today, I will be taking 5 minutes out of every meeting to recap it for them.
That might have been the longest I’ve ever held my breath
a young boy is laughing with his mouth open in a striped shirt .
ALT: a young boy is laughing with his mouth open in a striped shirt .
media.tenor.com
October 21, 2025 at 3:03 AM
That might have been the longest I’ve ever held my breath
Panicking because it appears my Illy instant coffee is being discontinued so now I’m probably going to die without it.
a woman in a black dress is standing on a set of stairs in a black and white photo .
ALT: a woman in a black dress is standing on a set of stairs in a black and white photo .
media.tenor.com
October 18, 2025 at 3:17 PM
Panicking because it appears my Illy instant coffee is being discontinued so now I’m probably going to die without it.