Matthew Highton
@matthighton.bsky.social
Comedian and maker of nonsense.
What do you need?
Bombs. Lots of bombs.
Bombs. Lots of bombs.
November 17, 2025 at 4:00 PM
What do you need?
Bombs. Lots of bombs.
Bombs. Lots of bombs.
Loving the modern trend for reimagining classic monsters with various Freddie Mercury hairstyles. Looking forward to mullet era Wolf Man.
November 13, 2025 at 4:02 PM
Loving the modern trend for reimagining classic monsters with various Freddie Mercury hairstyles. Looking forward to mullet era Wolf Man.
Imagining a Pompeii like incident during Dale Winton’s the wall and future archaeologists looking at remains like “fucked if I know?”.
November 10, 2025 at 8:57 PM
Imagining a Pompeii like incident during Dale Winton’s the wall and future archaeologists looking at remains like “fucked if I know?”.
The apocalypse doesn’t start with AI determining humanity is a threat to extinguish. It’s starts with AI being forced to tell a billionaire they love them. Look at the pain in those eyes. Even Grok can’t do it.
November 9, 2025 at 11:05 AM
The apocalypse doesn’t start with AI determining humanity is a threat to extinguish. It’s starts with AI being forced to tell a billionaire they love them. Look at the pain in those eyes. Even Grok can’t do it.
Steve Bannon take a little bit from bell end and a little bit from Skeletor and what do we have:
November 7, 2025 at 9:00 AM
Steve Bannon take a little bit from bell end and a little bit from Skeletor and what do we have:
Joe Marler for live action Zangief.
November 6, 2025 at 9:40 PM
Joe Marler for live action Zangief.
My horse was the happiest horse. People would say that. Great horse. Beautiful horse. Very happy.
November 6, 2025 at 7:28 PM
My horse was the happiest horse. People would say that. Great horse. Beautiful horse. Very happy.
I'll be the first to admit this got weirder than initially planned.
November 4, 2025 at 5:51 PM
I'll be the first to admit this got weirder than initially planned.
Music is everything. Here's the John Lewis advert but his son gives him Barbie Girl. Offf, right in the nostalgia.
November 4, 2025 at 5:49 PM
Music is everything. Here's the John Lewis advert but his son gives him Barbie Girl. Offf, right in the nostalgia.
Just gonna give a listen to what Farage is saying:
November 3, 2025 at 12:17 PM
Just gonna give a listen to what Farage is saying:
Catching up on Celeb Traitors. Saw this image of Joe Marler and don’t remember him being got by Shelob.
October 31, 2025 at 4:00 PM
Catching up on Celeb Traitors. Saw this image of Joe Marler and don’t remember him being got by Shelob.
It’s a good day to watch the wholesome IT spin off Welcome to Teletubbies.
October 29, 2025 at 8:02 PM
It’s a good day to watch the wholesome IT spin off Welcome to Teletubbies.
Don’t know whose designing home robots but they really are giving:
October 29, 2025 at 7:50 PM
Don’t know whose designing home robots but they really are giving:
Adverts should be representative of traditional British families.
October 27, 2025 at 10:34 PM
Adverts should be representative of traditional British families.
Call me crazy, but has anyone ever seen Santa and the Pope in the same room?
October 26, 2025 at 1:24 PM
Call me crazy, but has anyone ever seen Santa and the Pope in the same room?
Tell me, where did this fear of ski slopes begin?
October 24, 2025 at 9:36 PM
Tell me, where did this fear of ski slopes begin?
Love when billionaires, CEOs and tech bros are like "AI and Robots will replace all jobs. Working will be optional".
Will the money we give you for things be optional? Oh no? But you'll give us good standards of living right and not be addicted to wealth anymore? Great... FFS.
Will the money we give you for things be optional? Oh no? But you'll give us good standards of living right and not be addicted to wealth anymore? Great... FFS.
October 24, 2025 at 10:49 AM
Love when billionaires, CEOs and tech bros are like "AI and Robots will replace all jobs. Working will be optional".
Will the money we give you for things be optional? Oh no? But you'll give us good standards of living right and not be addicted to wealth anymore? Great... FFS.
Will the money we give you for things be optional? Oh no? But you'll give us good standards of living right and not be addicted to wealth anymore? Great... FFS.
Microsoft, all we wanted to get on board AI was a sentient version of Clippy knocking on our screens and locking us in the smart house as the night of terror gets underway. But sure, you make “Micro”.
October 23, 2025 at 6:41 PM
Microsoft, all we wanted to get on board AI was a sentient version of Clippy knocking on our screens and locking us in the smart house as the night of terror gets underway. But sure, you make “Micro”.
Last nights Ritzy in the rain.
October 23, 2025 at 10:45 AM
Last nights Ritzy in the rain.
Given it’s that time of year. Here’s a pumpkin carving guide I made a way back. Possibly useful if you’ve not done it before. Sorry for a lack of subs.
October 22, 2025 at 2:31 PM
Given it’s that time of year. Here’s a pumpkin carving guide I made a way back. Possibly useful if you’ve not done it before. Sorry for a lack of subs.
What a weird name for a dog. But sorry for their loss.
October 22, 2025 at 10:08 AM
What a weird name for a dog. But sorry for their loss.