LaZy JaMes
@j-meeeeee.bsky.social
Director of Emotional Stability for the 3rd Oblong. Rhysling lives! X-Minus One.
Oh, I'm sorry. Did I assassinate your penguin?
Oh, I'm sorry. Did I assassinate your penguin?
Pinned
My talent is pretending to have talent.
Watching Beatles Anthology and mention something about the history of Rock n Roll to my 27 year old son.
His reply.
"Dad stop. You know I have a Master's in Music, right? I teach this shit."
I've been schooled at my own game.
His reply.
"Dad stop. You know I have a Master's in Music, right? I teach this shit."
I've been schooled at my own game.
November 28, 2025 at 6:33 AM
Watching Beatles Anthology and mention something about the history of Rock n Roll to my 27 year old son.
His reply.
"Dad stop. You know I have a Master's in Music, right? I teach this shit."
I've been schooled at my own game.
His reply.
"Dad stop. You know I have a Master's in Music, right? I teach this shit."
I've been schooled at my own game.
BSKY is a great game and all. But how do you shoot?
November 28, 2025 at 6:23 AM
BSKY is a great game and all. But how do you shoot?
I use the word literally In the same sentence as many times as humanly possible because I worry you won't believe me otherwise. Somehow if I use the word literally, especially if incorrectly, you'll know I'm not lying.
November 28, 2025 at 6:11 AM
I use the word literally In the same sentence as many times as humanly possible because I worry you won't believe me otherwise. Somehow if I use the word literally, especially if incorrectly, you'll know I'm not lying.
Like that bitch who runs the Department of Education knows what a professional is. She sure the fuck isn't. Fuck her & fuck them. She can't change history and she fucking knows it! So fucking weak and sad.
Nurses & Social Workers have always been professionals and always will be.
Bitch.
Nurses & Social Workers have always been professionals and always will be.
Bitch.
November 28, 2025 at 5:35 AM
Like that bitch who runs the Department of Education knows what a professional is. She sure the fuck isn't. Fuck her & fuck them. She can't change history and she fucking knows it! So fucking weak and sad.
Nurses & Social Workers have always been professionals and always will be.
Bitch.
Nurses & Social Workers have always been professionals and always will be.
Bitch.
I'm sorry did I infiltrate your skircle?
Don't worry. You'll forget me when you're famous. But I'll always remember the likes we shared.
Don't worry. You'll forget me when you're famous. But I'll always remember the likes we shared.
November 28, 2025 at 5:06 AM
I'm sorry did I infiltrate your skircle?
Don't worry. You'll forget me when you're famous. But I'll always remember the likes we shared.
Don't worry. You'll forget me when you're famous. But I'll always remember the likes we shared.
Brother & sister Hollie and Will are in 1970s "The Land of the Lost" . Look it up. The set Sam is hiding in is very similar to where they hid from the T-Rex. Not a coincidence. Great reference!
November 28, 2025 at 3:46 AM
Brother & sister Hollie and Will are in 1970s "The Land of the Lost" . Look it up. The set Sam is hiding in is very similar to where they hid from the T-Rex. Not a coincidence. Great reference!
Merry Complaintsgiving! So much to be thankful for and yet so much complaining... At my house anyway.
November 28, 2025 at 1:53 AM
Merry Complaintsgiving! So much to be thankful for and yet so much complaining... At my house anyway.
"I demand to know what you brought to family dinner so I can spend the rest of the afternoon ridiculing, judging and comparing it to mine/mothers/grandmas/etc. It probably doesn't have enough salt., does it?"
Aunt Edna
Aunt Edna
November 27, 2025 at 7:48 PM
"I demand to know what you brought to family dinner so I can spend the rest of the afternoon ridiculing, judging and comparing it to mine/mothers/grandmas/etc. It probably doesn't have enough salt., does it?"
Aunt Edna
Aunt Edna
Smoking cigarettes and watching Captain Kangaroo. Now don't tell me I've nothing to do.
November 27, 2025 at 7:20 PM
Smoking cigarettes and watching Captain Kangaroo. Now don't tell me I've nothing to do.
Mom. Would it be alright if you swallowed that before you finish talking?
November 27, 2025 at 6:53 PM
Mom. Would it be alright if you swallowed that before you finish talking?
Ok. I admit it. Some of you are smarter than I am smart.
November 27, 2025 at 5:57 PM
Ok. I admit it. Some of you are smarter than I am smart.
Card-carrying member of the "not in your skircle" club.
November 27, 2025 at 4:35 PM
Card-carrying member of the "not in your skircle" club.
Looking forward to seeing my Great Uncle today and to see if he'll give me my nose back.
November 27, 2025 at 4:21 PM
Looking forward to seeing my Great Uncle today and to see if he'll give me my nose back.
I signed a Petition today. I expect action, dammit!
-What was it for?
I don't know.
-What was it for?
I don't know.
November 27, 2025 at 3:21 PM
I signed a Petition today. I expect action, dammit!
-What was it for?
I don't know.
-What was it for?
I don't know.
Post your warning label
November 27, 2025 at 1:04 AM
Post your warning label
You’ve just died.
The 6th picture in your phone gallery is what killed you.
The 6th picture in your phone gallery is what killed you.
November 27, 2025 at 12:32 AM
You’ve just died.
The 6th picture in your phone gallery is what killed you.
The 6th picture in your phone gallery is what killed you.
Jerry, just remember. It's not a lie... if you believe it...
November 26, 2025 at 9:45 PM
Jerry, just remember. It's not a lie... if you believe it...
How I'm rolling up to Thanksgiving
November 26, 2025 at 9:31 PM
How I'm rolling up to Thanksgiving
🎵My momma talkin' to me, try to tell me how to live
But I don't listen to her 'cause my head is like a sieve
My daddy, he disowned me 'cause I wear my sisters clothes
He caught me in the bathroom with a pair of pantyhose🎵
But I don't listen to her 'cause my head is like a sieve
My daddy, he disowned me 'cause I wear my sisters clothes
He caught me in the bathroom with a pair of pantyhose🎵
November 26, 2025 at 8:33 PM
🎵My momma talkin' to me, try to tell me how to live
But I don't listen to her 'cause my head is like a sieve
My daddy, he disowned me 'cause I wear my sisters clothes
He caught me in the bathroom with a pair of pantyhose🎵
But I don't listen to her 'cause my head is like a sieve
My daddy, he disowned me 'cause I wear my sisters clothes
He caught me in the bathroom with a pair of pantyhose🎵
I don't get why so many Boomers get a bad rap. Most of the ones I know are amazing human beings.
Could easily be that my Boomer mom only chose to hang out with awesome people.
Agreed. Some Boomers are assholes. But name a generation that DOESN'T have assholes.
Could easily be that my Boomer mom only chose to hang out with awesome people.
Agreed. Some Boomers are assholes. But name a generation that DOESN'T have assholes.
November 26, 2025 at 8:30 PM
I don't get why so many Boomers get a bad rap. Most of the ones I know are amazing human beings.
Could easily be that my Boomer mom only chose to hang out with awesome people.
Agreed. Some Boomers are assholes. But name a generation that DOESN'T have assholes.
Could easily be that my Boomer mom only chose to hang out with awesome people.
Agreed. Some Boomers are assholes. But name a generation that DOESN'T have assholes.
Older D-O-G (Hank) is snoring my office.
Sounds like a 4-year old crying,
"Dad.....",
"Dad.....",
"Dad.....",
Finally, I answered. "What son?"
He lifted his head drowsily and FARTED.
Good boy!
Now he's pissed that I woke him up.
Sounds like a 4-year old crying,
"Dad.....",
"Dad.....",
"Dad.....",
Finally, I answered. "What son?"
He lifted his head drowsily and FARTED.
Good boy!
Now he's pissed that I woke him up.
November 26, 2025 at 8:20 PM
Older D-O-G (Hank) is snoring my office.
Sounds like a 4-year old crying,
"Dad.....",
"Dad.....",
"Dad.....",
Finally, I answered. "What son?"
He lifted his head drowsily and FARTED.
Good boy!
Now he's pissed that I woke him up.
Sounds like a 4-year old crying,
"Dad.....",
"Dad.....",
"Dad.....",
Finally, I answered. "What son?"
He lifted his head drowsily and FARTED.
Good boy!
Now he's pissed that I woke him up.
"Can't you people see that I'm building something important here?", I say as I finish an entire pizza.
November 26, 2025 at 5:54 PM
"Can't you people see that I'm building something important here?", I say as I finish an entire pizza.
My grandmother once said, "If you want more friends you have to be friendly."
And see. That's the problem, right there.
And see. That's the problem, right there.
November 26, 2025 at 5:44 PM
My grandmother once said, "If you want more friends you have to be friendly."
And see. That's the problem, right there.
And see. That's the problem, right there.
Who Mutes their Moots?
November 26, 2025 at 4:50 PM
Who Mutes their Moots?