Iamfivebears
@iamfivebears.bsky.social
Posting from a rainy planet terraformed by an ancient experiment. Piloting robots but not in a way that glorifies state power. He/him.
https://books2read.com/u/31JlnD
https://books2read.com/u/31JlnD
Pinned
Iamfivebears
@iamfivebears.bsky.social
· Apr 20
I'm very excited to announce the release of my ebook. I've been working on this story in various forms for years, I'm so glad I'm finally able to share it.
Deep Salvage Report: A Pile of Ghosts
Deep Salvage Report: A Pile of Ghosts
You ever be having a good day and then Darby Allin happens? #AEW #AEWDynamite #BloodAndGuts #WrestleSky
November 14, 2025 at 2:42 AM
You ever be having a good day and then Darby Allin happens? #AEW #AEWDynamite #BloodAndGuts #WrestleSky
My Google Homes/Nests got an update that made them run on Google's Gemini AI. The only difference I've noticed is that if you say, "remind me to..." it goes, "I can't set reminders" but if you say, "set a task to..." it goes, "alright, I'll remind you at..."
November 14, 2025 at 2:04 AM
My Google Homes/Nests got an update that made them run on Google's Gemini AI. The only difference I've noticed is that if you say, "remind me to..." it goes, "I can't set reminders" but if you say, "set a task to..." it goes, "alright, I'll remind you at..."
Instead of a franchise whose whole business model is being visible from highway exits (Carvana, Top Golf) I'm instead going to construct a single tower that can be seen from all over Earth so that consumers (4|\| |=1|\|4|_|_¥ lvl33+ 60|)!
November 3, 2025 at 12:25 PM
Instead of a franchise whose whole business model is being visible from highway exits (Carvana, Top Golf) I'm instead going to construct a single tower that can be seen from all over Earth so that consumers (4|\| |=1|\|4|_|_¥ lvl33+ 60|)!
Noir detective who is also the femme fatale and is also pregnant:
That's right, it's my turn to expand humanity via contractions. But it won't contract any of my contracts. At most I'll have to go from 4 inch heels to 3. At least my husband will feel less threatened!
That's right, it's my turn to expand humanity via contractions. But it won't contract any of my contracts. At most I'll have to go from 4 inch heels to 3. At least my husband will feel less threatened!
October 31, 2025 at 3:23 AM
Noir detective who is also the femme fatale and is also pregnant:
That's right, it's my turn to expand humanity via contractions. But it won't contract any of my contracts. At most I'll have to go from 4 inch heels to 3. At least my husband will feel less threatened!
That's right, it's my turn to expand humanity via contractions. But it won't contract any of my contracts. At most I'll have to go from 4 inch heels to 3. At least my husband will feel less threatened!
Reposted by Iamfivebears
October 21, 2025 at 3:08 PM
Raise your hibitions
October 21, 2025 at 12:41 PM
Raise your hibitions
Using a real-world culture as the basis for your sci-fi naming conventions:
- Derivative
- Insensitive
- Lazy
Using the NFL as the basis for your sci-fi naming conventions:
- Plaxico
- D'Brickashaw
- Barkevious
- Derivative
- Insensitive
- Lazy
- Derivative
- Insensitive
- Lazy
Using the NFL as the basis for your sci-fi naming conventions:
- Plaxico
- D'Brickashaw
- Barkevious
- Derivative
- Insensitive
- Lazy
October 20, 2025 at 12:16 AM
Using a real-world culture as the basis for your sci-fi naming conventions:
- Derivative
- Insensitive
- Lazy
Using the NFL as the basis for your sci-fi naming conventions:
- Plaxico
- D'Brickashaw
- Barkevious
- Derivative
- Insensitive
- Lazy
- Derivative
- Insensitive
- Lazy
Using the NFL as the basis for your sci-fi naming conventions:
- Plaxico
- D'Brickashaw
- Barkevious
- Derivative
- Insensitive
- Lazy
Schreiber's house is probably triple the size of anyone else in that court room but he cannot possibly conceive of allowing a "good friend" (of which he claims to have many) to stay with him when the alternative is JAIL.
It's not even home detention! He literally just needs a place to stay! WTF!
It's not even home detention! He literally just needs a place to stay! WTF!
This person has a place to stay with a friend, but Judge Schreiber repeatedly questions the friend if he’s sure because Judge Schreiber say he himself has good friends but doesn’t know if he’d let them stay with him for 6 months so they won’t be locked up.
October 17, 2025 at 4:40 PM
Schreiber's house is probably triple the size of anyone else in that court room but he cannot possibly conceive of allowing a "good friend" (of which he claims to have many) to stay with him when the alternative is JAIL.
It's not even home detention! He literally just needs a place to stay! WTF!
It's not even home detention! He literally just needs a place to stay! WTF!
I could tell simply by looking at the packaging
October 15, 2025 at 3:58 AM
I could tell simply by looking at the packaging
Two funeral convoys both refusing to stop at an intersection and perfectly threading between each other except the hearses are slightly different sizes so they clip each other and the bodies swap.
October 13, 2025 at 11:28 PM
Two funeral convoys both refusing to stop at an intersection and perfectly threading between each other except the hearses are slightly different sizes so they clip each other and the bodies swap.
Mushroom Tor Andy
October 8, 2025 at 4:41 PM
Mushroom Tor Andy
1997, October 1,
The END DAY
The END DAY
October 1, 2025 at 7:29 PM
1997, October 1,
The END DAY
The END DAY
Do you remember?
21 guyssss on your member.
21 guyssss on your member.
"comedy is tragedy + time" wrong. comedy is when you sing a well known song but make the lyrics gay. suck my fucking peeeenis white boy and so on
September 15, 2025 at 10:07 PM
Do you remember?
21 guyssss on your member.
21 guyssss on your member.
Levi = jeans
EuGENE = Levy
They're literally telling us what they're doing and laughing in our face
EuGENE = Levy
They're literally telling us what they're doing and laughing in our face
September 14, 2025 at 6:35 PM
Levi = jeans
EuGENE = Levy
They're literally telling us what they're doing and laughing in our face
EuGENE = Levy
They're literally telling us what they're doing and laughing in our face
I don't know how everyone in this city can tell I'm a tourist but they're all willing to autograph my pith helmet and big magnifying glass so that's neat.
September 8, 2025 at 10:29 PM
I don't know how everyone in this city can tell I'm a tourist but they're all willing to autograph my pith helmet and big magnifying glass so that's neat.
The real tragedy of the media landscape becoming so fractured and segmented in the Internet age is that it's impossible to know which celebrities kids think have had a rib removed so they can suck their own dick (Mr Beast?????)
September 2, 2025 at 1:30 PM
The real tragedy of the media landscape becoming so fractured and segmented in the Internet age is that it's impossible to know which celebrities kids think have had a rib removed so they can suck their own dick (Mr Beast?????)
Happy St Johnswort Day to all who celebrate (just me and my buddy Herman)!
August 28, 2025 at 12:36 PM
Happy St Johnswort Day to all who celebrate (just me and my buddy Herman)!
Me when reasonable people balk at my radical takes.
August 21, 2025 at 7:06 PM
Me when reasonable people balk at my radical takes.
In the 2010s every video game with a faction system decided, "what if every faction was bad and you had to choose one you can tolerate?" and that's interesting once or twice but I dunno. I think games should have factions you WANT to join. I think that's more fun.
August 15, 2025 at 6:58 PM
In the 2010s every video game with a faction system decided, "what if every faction was bad and you had to choose one you can tolerate?" and that's interesting once or twice but I dunno. I think games should have factions you WANT to join. I think that's more fun.
Mystery Wrestling is attempting the #WorldsLongestMatch RIGHT NOW and @eviluno.bsky.social just realized he made a huge mistake. Check it out www.twitch.tv/eviluno
August 11, 2025 at 5:31 PM
Mystery Wrestling is attempting the #WorldsLongestMatch RIGHT NOW and @eviluno.bsky.social just realized he made a huge mistake. Check it out www.twitch.tv/eviluno
Got towed for parking illegally. I was gonna yell at the guy because there was no sign but it turns out this spot harbors the malignant curse of the heresiarch, so really the tow-guy did me a solid but that just makes me angrier?!
July 26, 2025 at 1:05 PM
Got towed for parking illegally. I was gonna yell at the guy because there was no sign but it turns out this spot harbors the malignant curse of the heresiarch, so really the tow-guy did me a solid but that just makes me angrier?!
Baseless #AEWAllIn Predictions:
Hangman new champ
CEO new champ
Okada over Omega
Bucks remain EVPs
Fletcher new TNT champ
Hurt Syndicate Retains
Opps Retain
OC Men's Casino winner
Thekla Women's Casino winner
Trent takes Big Boom AJ's finger
Outrunners over FTR
Hangman new champ
CEO new champ
Okada over Omega
Bucks remain EVPs
Fletcher new TNT champ
Hurt Syndicate Retains
Opps Retain
OC Men's Casino winner
Thekla Women's Casino winner
Trent takes Big Boom AJ's finger
Outrunners over FTR
July 12, 2025 at 4:28 PM
Baseless #AEWAllIn Predictions:
Hangman new champ
CEO new champ
Okada over Omega
Bucks remain EVPs
Fletcher new TNT champ
Hurt Syndicate Retains
Opps Retain
OC Men's Casino winner
Thekla Women's Casino winner
Trent takes Big Boom AJ's finger
Outrunners over FTR
Hangman new champ
CEO new champ
Okada over Omega
Bucks remain EVPs
Fletcher new TNT champ
Hurt Syndicate Retains
Opps Retain
OC Men's Casino winner
Thekla Women's Casino winner
Trent takes Big Boom AJ's finger
Outrunners over FTR
I got to the office late today and some recogmancer had swept through and stolen everyone's sentience so they were pawing at my free will and I had to be all "not till I've had my coffee!"
July 9, 2025 at 3:03 AM
I got to the office late today and some recogmancer had swept through and stolen everyone's sentience so they were pawing at my free will and I had to be all "not till I've had my coffee!"
The thing about the humidity is that it is it
July 2, 2025 at 10:11 PM
The thing about the humidity is that it is it
You can't put a price on $7
June 26, 2025 at 5:41 PM
You can't put a price on $7