Heather Laura Clarke
@hfxheather.bsky.social
Marketing manager by day, aspiring novelist by dawn. Proud member of the #5amWritersClub. Lover of sewing, tea, and clacky pink keyboards. She/Her.
Reposted by Heather Laura Clarke
motion that going forward
CP Allen should be mentioned in full as it legal
Charles Pillsbury Allen
CP Allen should be mentioned in full as it legal
Charles Pillsbury Allen
February 10, 2026 at 9:42 PM
motion that going forward
CP Allen should be mentioned in full as it legal
Charles Pillsbury Allen
CP Allen should be mentioned in full as it legal
Charles Pillsbury Allen
I just found a bouncy ball in my kid’s lunch bag. One of those rubber quarter-sized ones from kiddie loot bags.
My immediate instinct was “Nope! Straight to the garbage! Choking hazard!”
She’s almost 14 so I *think* I don’t have to worry about that anymore. But it was a visceral reaction.
My immediate instinct was “Nope! Straight to the garbage! Choking hazard!”
She’s almost 14 so I *think* I don’t have to worry about that anymore. But it was a visceral reaction.
January 29, 2026 at 11:30 AM
I just found a bouncy ball in my kid’s lunch bag. One of those rubber quarter-sized ones from kiddie loot bags.
My immediate instinct was “Nope! Straight to the garbage! Choking hazard!”
She’s almost 14 so I *think* I don’t have to worry about that anymore. But it was a visceral reaction.
My immediate instinct was “Nope! Straight to the garbage! Choking hazard!”
She’s almost 14 so I *think* I don’t have to worry about that anymore. But it was a visceral reaction.
Leaving the house on Wednesday for the first time since Friday morning. ✌️
January 28, 2026 at 11:39 AM
Leaving the house on Wednesday for the first time since Friday morning. ✌️
Eight full snow days and three delayed-start snow days.
It feels like they may never attend school again.
(But my Grade 10 is getting lots of extra study time as the exams keep bumping ahead.)
❄️ ❄️ ❄️
It feels like they may never attend school again.
(But my Grade 10 is getting lots of extra study time as the exams keep bumping ahead.)
❄️ ❄️ ❄️
January 27, 2026 at 1:41 PM
Eight full snow days and three delayed-start snow days.
It feels like they may never attend school again.
(But my Grade 10 is getting lots of extra study time as the exams keep bumping ahead.)
❄️ ❄️ ❄️
It feels like they may never attend school again.
(But my Grade 10 is getting lots of extra study time as the exams keep bumping ahead.)
❄️ ❄️ ❄️
Past Heather sent an important message to Present Heather, specifically about sleeping on wet hair.
January 20, 2026 at 1:03 AM
Past Heather sent an important message to Present Heather, specifically about sleeping on wet hair.
During a sales call on Friday, an American said something about how Monday’s “a day off for all of us.”
“No, not for us.”
“But it’s, like, Presidents’ Day.”
“We don’t have presidents.”
“Oh.”
Reader, he was doubly wrong. Today is not Presidents’ Day. Today is Martin Luther King Jr. Day.
“No, not for us.”
“But it’s, like, Presidents’ Day.”
“We don’t have presidents.”
“Oh.”
Reader, he was doubly wrong. Today is not Presidents’ Day. Today is Martin Luther King Jr. Day.
a man is making a funny face while wearing a black shirt and a silver chain .
ALT: a man is making a funny face while wearing a black shirt and a silver chain .
media.tenor.com
January 19, 2026 at 12:57 PM
During a sales call on Friday, an American said something about how Monday’s “a day off for all of us.”
“No, not for us.”
“But it’s, like, Presidents’ Day.”
“We don’t have presidents.”
“Oh.”
Reader, he was doubly wrong. Today is not Presidents’ Day. Today is Martin Luther King Jr. Day.
“No, not for us.”
“But it’s, like, Presidents’ Day.”
“We don’t have presidents.”
“Oh.”
Reader, he was doubly wrong. Today is not Presidents’ Day. Today is Martin Luther King Jr. Day.
Hexagon flowers 💐 for a fun new quilt!
January 12, 2026 at 12:17 AM
Hexagon flowers 💐 for a fun new quilt!
I wish you could “set” algorithms so when you feel like scrolling a specific type of content, that’s what you’d get.
Instead of scrolling for a while *showing* the algorithm the content you feel like seeing (while it warms up), it could be immediate.
And don’t say search. It’s not the same. 🤷🏻♀️
Instead of scrolling for a while *showing* the algorithm the content you feel like seeing (while it warms up), it could be immediate.
And don’t say search. It’s not the same. 🤷🏻♀️
January 11, 2026 at 11:23 AM
I wish you could “set” algorithms so when you feel like scrolling a specific type of content, that’s what you’d get.
Instead of scrolling for a while *showing* the algorithm the content you feel like seeing (while it warms up), it could be immediate.
And don’t say search. It’s not the same. 🤷🏻♀️
Instead of scrolling for a while *showing* the algorithm the content you feel like seeing (while it warms up), it could be immediate.
And don’t say search. It’s not the same. 🤷🏻♀️
Writing essentials ✨
1. Writing planner
2. Hot water
3. Hand lotion
4. Nail file
5. Random lip balm
Not pictured: computer, headphones, reliable attention span
1. Writing planner
2. Hot water
3. Hand lotion
4. Nail file
5. Random lip balm
Not pictured: computer, headphones, reliable attention span
January 4, 2026 at 7:22 PM
Writing essentials ✨
1. Writing planner
2. Hot water
3. Hand lotion
4. Nail file
5. Random lip balm
Not pictured: computer, headphones, reliable attention span
1. Writing planner
2. Hot water
3. Hand lotion
4. Nail file
5. Random lip balm
Not pictured: computer, headphones, reliable attention span
Back at work. Clothes. Bra. Makeup. Hair.
It’s admittedly a relief to longer be startled by a pale creature in PJs whenever I look in the mirror.
And it’s Friday! An excellent day to reenter the workweek.
It’s admittedly a relief to longer be startled by a pale creature in PJs whenever I look in the mirror.
And it’s Friday! An excellent day to reenter the workweek.
a full length mirror sitting on a wood floor
ALT: a full length mirror sitting on a wood floor
media.tenor.com
January 2, 2026 at 4:22 PM
Back at work. Clothes. Bra. Makeup. Hair.
It’s admittedly a relief to longer be startled by a pale creature in PJs whenever I look in the mirror.
And it’s Friday! An excellent day to reenter the workweek.
It’s admittedly a relief to longer be startled by a pale creature in PJs whenever I look in the mirror.
And it’s Friday! An excellent day to reenter the workweek.
Parenting is a riot honestly 10/10 😂
December 14, 2025 at 8:52 PM
Parenting is a riot honestly 10/10 😂
Writing out Christmas cards and pretending I’m Taylor Swift writing out bonus cards in Episode 2.
December 13, 2025 at 5:01 PM
Writing out Christmas cards and pretending I’m Taylor Swift writing out bonus cards in Episode 2.
Reposted by Heather Laura Clarke
watching the Eras Tour doc
and wishing there was a doc just on the stage
like a How it's Made
and wishing there was a doc just on the stage
like a How it's Made
December 13, 2025 at 3:16 PM
watching the Eras Tour doc
and wishing there was a doc just on the stage
like a How it's Made
and wishing there was a doc just on the stage
like a How it's Made
Movie you’ve watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Stars (Wars nor Trek), LOTR, or Marvel, Disney Animated or Pixar.
December 8, 2025 at 2:47 PM
Movie you’ve watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Stars (Wars nor Trek), LOTR, or Marvel, Disney Animated or Pixar.
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen
Taylor Swift ✨
Avril Lavigne x 3
Hilary Duff x 2
Backstreet Boys
Spice Girls
Taylor Swift ✨
Avril Lavigne x 3
Hilary Duff x 2
Backstreet Boys
Spice Girls
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen
Tragically Hip
Green Day
Smashing Pumpkins
B.B. King
Ivana Santilli
Tragically Hip
Green Day
Smashing Pumpkins
B.B. King
Ivana Santilli
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen
Dropkick Murphys
Elvis Costello
Foo Fighters
Circle Jerks
NOFX
Dropkick Murphys
Elvis Costello
Foo Fighters
Circle Jerks
NOFX
November 28, 2025 at 2:53 PM
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen
Taylor Swift ✨
Avril Lavigne x 3
Hilary Duff x 2
Backstreet Boys
Spice Girls
Taylor Swift ✨
Avril Lavigne x 3
Hilary Duff x 2
Backstreet Boys
Spice Girls
I made this ornament in 2021. Four years later, shit is even MORE expensive. 🥴
November 23, 2025 at 7:33 PM
I made this ornament in 2021. Four years later, shit is even MORE expensive. 🥴
At least they aren’t calling them “fun-sized” Snickers anymore.
There is nothing fun about a Snickers the size of your thumbnail.
There is nothing fun about a Snickers the size of your thumbnail.
a man is holding a magnifying glass in front of his face while a woman looks on .
ALT: a man is holding a magnifying glass in front of his face while a woman looks on .
media.tenor.com
November 1, 2025 at 11:35 AM
At least they aren’t calling them “fun-sized” Snickers anymore.
There is nothing fun about a Snickers the size of your thumbnail.
There is nothing fun about a Snickers the size of your thumbnail.
A teenaged trick-or-treater just said “Your stairs almost killed me. I’m suing you.” 🥴
October 31, 2025 at 10:30 PM
A teenaged trick-or-treater just said “Your stairs almost killed me. I’m suing you.” 🥴
The local youths are appreciating my 6/7 pumpkin. 🎃 👏 Lots of little squeals of “Six sevennnnnn!”
October 31, 2025 at 9:36 PM
The local youths are appreciating my 6/7 pumpkin. 🎃 👏 Lots of little squeals of “Six sevennnnnn!”
The Internet is not Internet-ing today, and it’s very frustrating as a person who works on the internet.
AWS, you’ve had a fine time ruining everything.
AWS, you’ve had a fine time ruining everything.
a cartoon character says " what the hell happened " while holding a purple mask
ALT: a cartoon character says " what the hell happened " while holding a purple mask
media.tenor.com
October 20, 2025 at 8:00 PM
The Internet is not Internet-ing today, and it’s very frustrating as a person who works on the internet.
AWS, you’ve had a fine time ruining everything.
AWS, you’ve had a fine time ruining everything.
Exactly what I say when I see these truck signs. Yes, please!
October 15, 2025 at 10:02 PM
Exactly what I say when I see these truck signs. Yes, please!
Part of my job involves sales.
I just woke up from a nightmare where I was giving a video-call demo in a bathrobe (with nothing underneath) and it kept opening.
I couldn’t open my deck.
I had accidentally shared my entire screen.
… and the potential client was somehow IN THE ROOM with me.
I just woke up from a nightmare where I was giving a video-call demo in a bathrobe (with nothing underneath) and it kept opening.
I couldn’t open my deck.
I had accidentally shared my entire screen.
… and the potential client was somehow IN THE ROOM with me.
a woman is sleeping on a bed with a bbc america logo
ALT: a woman is sleeping on a bed with a bbc america logo
media.tenor.com
October 12, 2025 at 9:18 AM
Part of my job involves sales.
I just woke up from a nightmare where I was giving a video-call demo in a bathrobe (with nothing underneath) and it kept opening.
I couldn’t open my deck.
I had accidentally shared my entire screen.
… and the potential client was somehow IN THE ROOM with me.
I just woke up from a nightmare where I was giving a video-call demo in a bathrobe (with nothing underneath) and it kept opening.
I couldn’t open my deck.
I had accidentally shared my entire screen.
… and the potential client was somehow IN THE ROOM with me.
I thought it was illegal not to wear a bike helmet, but maybe that was just a lie I believed, and then passed along to my kids?
It seems every motorcyclist I see is not wearing a helmet these days and it shocks me.
It seems every motorcyclist I see is not wearing a helmet these days and it shocks me.
September 29, 2025 at 12:09 PM
I thought it was illegal not to wear a bike helmet, but maybe that was just a lie I believed, and then passed along to my kids?
It seems every motorcyclist I see is not wearing a helmet these days and it shocks me.
It seems every motorcyclist I see is not wearing a helmet these days and it shocks me.
7 a.m. video meeting with people who are 11 hours ahead, fun fun fun fun fun 🙃 🥱
a woman in a pink suit is sitting at a desk with a stack of papers in front of her
ALT: a woman in a pink suit is sitting at a desk with a stack of papers in front of her
media.tenor.com
September 23, 2025 at 9:56 AM
7 a.m. video meeting with people who are 11 hours ahead, fun fun fun fun fun 🙃 🥱
Sports people, are the Savannah Bananas 🍌 a real #baseball team?
If they’re real, I might … like a sports team?
If they’re real, I might … like a sports team?
a woman in a red sequined dress is sitting in a chair on a tv show called the voice
ALT: a woman in a red sequined dress is sitting in a chair on a tv show called the voice
media.tenor.com
September 9, 2025 at 11:57 AM
Sports people, are the Savannah Bananas 🍌 a real #baseball team?
If they’re real, I might … like a sports team?
If they’re real, I might … like a sports team?