Andreas Spitzer
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eviljackcarver.de
Andreas Spitzer
@eviljackcarver.de
68 followers 94 following 470 posts
🔞

30-something. He/him or they/them. Furry/scalie.

If you follow me without interacting first, and your following count is in the 4 digits but your post count is barely 2, I'll likely assume you're a bot and block you.
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eviljackcarver.de
Got a call from their Human Resources department.
The words "INTERVIEW SECURED", in gold on a black banner, in the style of Elden Ring.
November 24, 2025 at 7:12 PM
eviljackcarver.de
I had a hard drive going out on me, so I used the charge card and ordered one.

Two came in today.

I'm so confused.
Two Western Digital hard disks, each with an 8-terabyte capacity, sit on a bedsheet. I only ordered one.
November 6, 2025 at 11:33 PM
eviljackcarver.de
"I rejected those answers. Instead, I chose something different. I chose the impossible. I chose... Rapture.

A city where the artist would not fear the censor, where the scientist would not be bound by petty morality, where the great would not be constrained by the small!"

- Andrew Ryan, BioShock
A screenshot from Bioshock. A glass wall is in front of the player. In the middle of the glass wall is a door, flanked by statues on either side. A plaque above reads, "Welcome To Rapture. Opportunity awaits." Through the glass, parts of the large, underwater city of Rapture can be seen.
September 23, 2025 at 5:20 PM
eviljackcarver.de
31.

(Both images by @leggy2fast.art)
A large circle with "30+" in the middle. Andreas, looking up at an early-sunset sky amongst the forest. Piper on the edge of a mountain lake, looking back at the viewer over his shoulder.
September 4, 2025 at 8:11 AM
eviljackcarver.de
Okay. I can finally talk about it publicly...

Yesterday, a project of mine which has been two years in the making(!) has finally come to fruition. I can now...

- record from my computer onto VHS tape
- record from the tape deck back onto my computer

Two years! And it's finally done!
A screenshot of OBS' output preview. The quality is garbage, but that's what you get when you run a 1080p capture down to 480i and then back up to 1080p. On the left side, the VCR's display shows that the VCR is stopped, near the start of the tape. The time display shows Sunday at 1:51 AM, and below that, the tape counter shows that it's up 3 seconds from the end of the tape.
August 24, 2025 at 6:54 AM
eviljackcarver.de
Gotchu covered
A very quickly-doodled doodle of Tempo, the Dutch Angel Dragon, painting a singular dumbbell. Tempo is expressing his frustration in painting them, saying "I hate weight painting!"
July 18, 2025 at 9:27 PM
eviljackcarver.de
Mine pretty much accurately reflects how I was raised.

I'm not against trying something at least once, but a lot of stuff they showed... too rich for my blood.
A results page for the food choice test going around. The results skew heavily middle class, with a sharp drop off above that.
July 1, 2025 at 12:26 AM
eviljackcarver.de
Definitely going to see some use, methinks.
A small keyboard with a trackball in a flip-up rack assembly. The plates blocking certain keys on the bottom row have been ground down.
June 12, 2025 at 4:01 AM
eviljackcarver.de
gotchu covered
June 8, 2025 at 7:37 AM
eviljackcarver.de
I think I might actually have the first one!

It's a good pose, honestly, and at some point I want to re-take the shot, even if you feel it's overdone.
Tempo, a Dutch angel dragon, is holding his paw out to the viewer, inviting them along on an adventure.
May 3, 2025 at 6:24 AM
eviljackcarver.de
On 9th April, I was laying in bed trying to sort some miscellany out when I had an anxiety attack. I tried to ride it out, but it got a lot worse - so bad, I could physically FEEL the valves in my heart opening and closing.

It was... weird and uncomfortable.

(2/6)
A screenshot of a fitness tracker, showing a line graph of my heart rate on 9th April. At roughly 05:45, there's a spike from about 60 beats per minute, up to 90, that was sustained for long enough that the heart rate tracking picked up on it. After that, the heart rate went back down to about 55 bpm for about twenty minutes before sinking to about 45-50 while I was asleep. Stats below the graph show the asleep heart rate at about 47 bpm, and the maximum recorded heart rate at 112.
April 25, 2025 at 9:05 AM
eviljackcarver.de
I found your work through Ink. New camera that came just before the pandemic plus meeting him just after; in 2021 I was eager to put it to use and he was a more-than-willing test subject.
The first photo I ever took of InkBlitz and Firestoem. Stoem, a snow leopard/dragon hybrid (left) is leaning on the shoulder of Eventide, a bright manokit (right). One of my personal favourite photos I've taken of Tempo. Tempo, a blue and white Dutch Angel Dragon, is holding a stick in his mouth like a dork. A photo of myself holding up Eventide's head, in an "Alas, Poor Yorick!" pose. I'm pretty sure I even quoted the lines at the time. A photo from two years after the previous three. Nimbus is holding a tablet, with Eventide leaning down beside. The tablet shows a get-well-soon card, signed by the SpiritPanda family that was present.
April 24, 2025 at 7:55 PM
eviljackcarver.de
Closest thing I have on my phone is Rummy...
A game of rummy, played on a phone in landscape mode. The discard pile shows a 6 of diamonds. There is only one opponent, a computer player named "Nolan North". Nolan has melded a book (or a three-of-a-kind) of nines, a book of aces, and a 6-to-8 run (or straight) of hearts. This leaves 5 cards remaining in Nolan's hand. It is the player's turn. The player has a 3-to-5 run of hearts, a 2-to-6 run of clubs, a book of tens and a book of aces. All of the cards except a 2 of diamonds are selected, and the game is prompting the player to meld them. With the two of diamonds being the discard, the player is about to go gin (or meld all cards in their hand at once).
April 12, 2025 at 11:07 PM
eviljackcarver.de
EY YO THERE'S VORE ART ON THE ENGLISH WIKIPEDIA PAGE FOR THE LENOVO THINKPAD???

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ThinkPa... (it's the last image in the section)

(n.b.: image credit: sfw.furaffinity.net/view/39690487/ )
A screenshot from Wikipedia, of an image embed. The caption reads "ThinkPad X220 Tablet in laptop and tablet mode". The desktop background is vore-adjacent art. A larger screenshot of the first image of the embed shown in the previous image, showing the vore-adjacent art in more detail. The Wikipedia page header is visible.
March 12, 2025 at 9:50 AM
eviljackcarver.de
A doodle on thermal paper. A very cartoonish dragon is holding up a shark tooth that is massive in comparison. There are sparkles coming off the shark tooth. Beneath, in Legend of Zelda-styled text boxes are the words, "You found a SHARK TOOTH! Collect a bunch for a SPECIAL PRIZE!"
February 9, 2025 at 2:59 AM
eviljackcarver.de
On both sides of the camera - the first one was taken by myself, and the second one was taken by the human in the first one.

Dinghy is TALL.

---

Left: 👥 @dinghymanokit.bsky.social, @howlhound.bsky.social // 📸 myself

Right: 👥 Dinghy, myself // 📸 HowlHound

🪡 @spiritpanda.bsky.social

#MFF2024
A photo of Dinghy (a blue and gold manokit) and HowlHound (in their human suit) standing shoulder-to-shoulder in the lobby of the Hyatt Regency O'Hare. A photo of Dinghy (a blue and gold manokit) and Andreas (in his human suit) standing shoulder-to-shoulder in the lobby of the Hyatt Regency O'Hare.
January 22, 2025 at 7:12 PM
eviljackcarver.de
A dot-matrix motorway sign. It says "LIZZARD WARNING - 4 AM SATURDAY TO [...] ON SUNDAY". It's very obvious that some of the dot matrix units are damaged.
January 5, 2025 at 7:30 PM
eviljackcarver.de
Two Cool Dudes hanging out.

👥 @spiritpanda.bsky.social (left), @blitz.spotcat.ink (right)
🪡 SpiritPanda

🗒️ Canon EOS Rebel T6; f/4.5 @ 36mm
A photo of two manokits in a meeting room. Tidalwave, left, is standing crossarmed looking off to the left of the camera. Eventide, right, is leaning on Tidalwave's shoulder.
December 20, 2024 at 7:15 PM
eviljackcarver.de
"What's a manokit?"
"Fox, plus shark, divide by two; that's a manokit."

Photo of Dinghy and Tidaleus from the #MFF2024 Manokit meetup!

👥 @tidale.us; @dinghymanokit.bsky.social
🪡 @spiritpanda.bsky.social

📝 Canon EOS Rebel T6, f/5 @ 29mm
A photo of two manokits taken in a meeting room. Tidaleus (left) and Dinghy (right) are standing cross-armed, shoulder-to-shoulder, striking a pose.
December 13, 2024 at 8:11 PM
eviljackcarver.de
at the request of @friendlyfiend.bsky.social
A long-zoom photo of someone on a balcony, smoking. They look a lot like MacIntyre Womack from Super Troopers.
December 10, 2024 at 2:54 AM
eviljackcarver.de
Last night, I finished what might be my final race of the year. It was a low turnout, and I got overtaken on the final lap, but I still managed P5 in the end, with a 0,17 second gap to P4.

I'm improving my racecraft - this is the second battle for a position I've had! Ever!
A Chevrolet Camaro, pained to look like a snow leopard and assigned the number 23, on the formation lap of a sim-race at Circuit Paul Ricard. The brakes are... yep, they're glowing pretty bright. The same Chevrolet Camaro, quite some time later, being chased down by a Porsche 714. The LumiRank display in the windscreen shows the Camaro as being in 4th place. The №23 Chevrolet Camaro, skidding onto the back straight of Circuit Paul Ricard. The Porsche 714 is even closer. An overhead view of the timing line of Circuit Paul Ricard. The №23 Camaro is about to cross, with about a car's length to the Porsche 714 ahead. The Porsche has already finished the race, having narrowly beaten the Camaro.
November 23, 2024 at 6:58 PM