Drakyn this corpse all over town
@drakyn.bsky.social
Union Carpenter. Local Landmark. Stories about me are probably true but I tell them better.
Catered for both him and Christie and only nice thing I'll ever say about Christie is that his campaign manager remembers to tip.
McGreevey's husband sent me back 3 times for stuff he forgot to put on the order and didn't tip nada
McGreevey's husband sent me back 3 times for stuff he forgot to put on the order and didn't tip nada
November 28, 2025 at 3:43 AM
Catered for both him and Christie and only nice thing I'll ever say about Christie is that his campaign manager remembers to tip.
McGreevey's husband sent me back 3 times for stuff he forgot to put on the order and didn't tip nada
McGreevey's husband sent me back 3 times for stuff he forgot to put on the order and didn't tip nada
There's no evidence that this place even sells pizza. Raph might just have that Demolition Man Syndrome where every restaurant is Taco Bell
November 27, 2025 at 11:08 PM
There's no evidence that this place even sells pizza. Raph might just have that Demolition Man Syndrome where every restaurant is Taco Bell
Yeah, I'm arachnophobic but my toddler loves all them creepy-crawlies so I'm learning to appreciate them
November 27, 2025 at 2:57 PM
Yeah, I'm arachnophobic but my toddler loves all them creepy-crawlies so I'm learning to appreciate them
Here in Jersey it's mostly wolf spiders, which live and hunt on the ground. They aren't aggressive towards human farmers and are extremely helpful with pest control in the bogs
November 27, 2025 at 2:50 PM
Here in Jersey it's mostly wolf spiders, which live and hunt on the ground. They aren't aggressive towards human farmers and are extremely helpful with pest control in the bogs
finally, a use case for chatgpt
November 27, 2025 at 1:49 PM
finally, a use case for chatgpt
Transitions are rough
November 27, 2025 at 1:40 PM
Transitions are rough
When I was a seatfiller at a charity gala I leaned over to Kal Penn and whispered "Oh my god I'm can't believe I'm sitting next to Kermit!"
November 24, 2025 at 7:10 PM
When I was a seatfiller at a charity gala I leaned over to Kal Penn and whispered "Oh my god I'm can't believe I'm sitting next to Kermit!"
"rolling out a little red carpet for yourself" is going to live in my mind forever and it's going to be a struggle not to say it aloud in public
November 22, 2025 at 1:56 AM
"rolling out a little red carpet for yourself" is going to live in my mind forever and it's going to be a struggle not to say it aloud in public
There's that one stretch of the turnpike near exit 9 that occasionally overpoweringly smells like good falafel but probably a hot fresh PE&C SPK on an everything bagel
November 21, 2025 at 9:21 PM
There's that one stretch of the turnpike near exit 9 that occasionally overpoweringly smells like good falafel but probably a hot fresh PE&C SPK on an everything bagel
If I held office I'd pass a law that any cell tower camouflaged as a "tree" must be redesigned by the localities most unhinged resident artist
November 21, 2025 at 9:10 PM
If I held office I'd pass a law that any cell tower camouflaged as a "tree" must be redesigned by the localities most unhinged resident artist
I had just cashed the last paycheck from a job that had fired me and was just "Oh no. My bills"
November 21, 2025 at 9:07 PM
I had just cashed the last paycheck from a job that had fired me and was just "Oh no. My bills"
That guy who rates restaurants?
November 20, 2025 at 1:30 AM
That guy who rates restaurants?
In Philly you would have been like unto a God
November 19, 2025 at 12:25 AM
In Philly you would have been like unto a God
Jasper Fforde's Early Riser is about exactly this and - zombified Carmen Miranda aside - your argument has its merits
November 19, 2025 at 12:04 AM
Jasper Fforde's Early Riser is about exactly this and - zombified Carmen Miranda aside - your argument has its merits
Casting Director: So who do you want to play Bruce Wayne
Tim Burton: Get me that hot guy from Beetlejuice
CD: I've got Mr. Baldwin's info right here and....
Burton: What!? No! I said the HOT one
Tim Burton: Get me that hot guy from Beetlejuice
CD: I've got Mr. Baldwin's info right here and....
Burton: What!? No! I said the HOT one
November 16, 2025 at 8:36 PM
Casting Director: So who do you want to play Bruce Wayne
Tim Burton: Get me that hot guy from Beetlejuice
CD: I've got Mr. Baldwin's info right here and....
Burton: What!? No! I said the HOT one
Tim Burton: Get me that hot guy from Beetlejuice
CD: I've got Mr. Baldwin's info right here and....
Burton: What!? No! I said the HOT one
That's awesome! I miss nyc theatre so much that I'm building a stage in my backyard for my toddler and her friends
November 16, 2025 at 8:46 AM
That's awesome! I miss nyc theatre so much that I'm building a stage in my backyard for my toddler and her friends
Honestly thought this was a Steve Martin line
November 10, 2025 at 8:47 PM
Honestly thought this was a Steve Martin line
Watching the Super Bowl halftime with my mother-in-law.
"I can't understand a word he's saying. Let's re-watch this after I look up the lyrics so I can properly appreciate it"
"I can't understand a word he's saying. Let's re-watch this after I look up the lyrics so I can properly appreciate it"
November 10, 2025 at 8:46 PM
Watching the Super Bowl halftime with my mother-in-law.
"I can't understand a word he's saying. Let's re-watch this after I look up the lyrics so I can properly appreciate it"
"I can't understand a word he's saying. Let's re-watch this after I look up the lyrics so I can properly appreciate it"
Reading Inherent Vice right now after having only read Crying of Lot 49 and dude has a voice
November 10, 2025 at 12:11 AM
Reading Inherent Vice right now after having only read Crying of Lot 49 and dude has a voice