🐌 Snaily Ham 🍖
@snailyham.bsky.social
Miscreant. Walking cautionary tale. Frequent hot mess. Little package, big trouble.
She/Her
Actual Professional Dancer
She/Her
Actual Professional Dancer
I'll never get over how both of the dogs MUST inspect each package that arrives
December 4, 2025 at 9:12 PM
I'll never get over how both of the dogs MUST inspect each package that arrives
New record set for number of squirrels in the back yard at one time. 12. TWELVE. When do I start worrying myself with squirrel gang activity?
December 4, 2025 at 12:21 AM
New record set for number of squirrels in the back yard at one time. 12. TWELVE. When do I start worrying myself with squirrel gang activity?
Adhd so bad I just lost a significant amount of time watching a fat squirrel dig around in the flower beds through the window
a woman is looking out of a window and making a face .
ALT: a woman is looking out of a window and making a face .
media.tenor.com
December 2, 2025 at 11:56 PM
Adhd so bad I just lost a significant amount of time watching a fat squirrel dig around in the flower beds through the window
More bad news. It wasn't under the house, which means it's in the wall! Yay! And the entire kitchen and my bathroom REEKS of dead animal. I guess I found my diet plan...
Also, my bf promised he'd go under the house today to get said dead animal and I catch him putting pomade in his hair and fully dressed like he's going straight to work. "I take it you're not going under the house today?"
"Yeah, I was about to do that."
Um...you're gonna need a shower, bro.
"Yeah, I was about to do that."
Um...you're gonna need a shower, bro.
December 1, 2025 at 8:54 PM
More bad news. It wasn't under the house, which means it's in the wall! Yay! And the entire kitchen and my bathroom REEKS of dead animal. I guess I found my diet plan...
Reposted by 🐌 Snaily Ham 🍖
Don’t shop at big retailers this year, give these gifts instead!
- mysterious bowl of moss
- inscrutable jar of fog
- weird old log
- large boulder the size of a small boulder
- scarf infused with goblin wild magic
- mysterious bowl of moss
- inscrutable jar of fog
- weird old log
- large boulder the size of a small boulder
- scarf infused with goblin wild magic
December 1, 2025 at 8:01 PM
Don’t shop at big retailers this year, give these gifts instead!
- mysterious bowl of moss
- inscrutable jar of fog
- weird old log
- large boulder the size of a small boulder
- scarf infused with goblin wild magic
- mysterious bowl of moss
- inscrutable jar of fog
- weird old log
- large boulder the size of a small boulder
- scarf infused with goblin wild magic
What is even going on lately? I have some sort of bad juju or something. There's a dead animal stinking under my house. My cricut/design space WILL NOT act right. I missed a delivery that almost always comes after noon. All my other deliveries are late. What did I doooo!??!
December 1, 2025 at 8:25 PM
What is even going on lately? I have some sort of bad juju or something. There's a dead animal stinking under my house. My cricut/design space WILL NOT act right. I missed a delivery that almost always comes after noon. All my other deliveries are late. What did I doooo!??!
Diffusing your long curly hair should be an Olympic sport
November 26, 2025 at 10:26 PM
Diffusing your long curly hair should be an Olympic sport
I made a bunch of really cute ornaments to sell and last night at the Phish tribute show- this was the only one to find a home 😂
(I didn't get a pic of it finished but you get the point)
(I didn't get a pic of it finished but you get the point)
November 26, 2025 at 8:08 PM
I made a bunch of really cute ornaments to sell and last night at the Phish tribute show- this was the only one to find a home 😂
(I didn't get a pic of it finished but you get the point)
(I didn't get a pic of it finished but you get the point)
I made some magnetic bookmarks
13 of 17 immediately came unglued when I tested them after drying. This is my crafting joker origin story
13 of 17 immediately came unglued when I tested them after drying. This is my crafting joker origin story
November 25, 2025 at 12:16 AM
I made some magnetic bookmarks
13 of 17 immediately came unglued when I tested them after drying. This is my crafting joker origin story
13 of 17 immediately came unglued when I tested them after drying. This is my crafting joker origin story
Today is sad day for my timeline so maybe just avoid but even though she was mean and narcissistic 99% of the time...I still miss my mommy. Why are things so hard? I just want to hear her say it'll be ok 😭
November 24, 2025 at 7:36 PM
Today is sad day for my timeline so maybe just avoid but even though she was mean and narcissistic 99% of the time...I still miss my mommy. Why are things so hard? I just want to hear her say it'll be ok 😭
Im genuinely fucking losing it living with two men. As much as I bitch, my boyfriend really does try to step up and help out, but alas, he's a man. My dad on the other hand? So fucking lazy and useless around the house i can't stand it.
November 24, 2025 at 7:13 PM
Im genuinely fucking losing it living with two men. As much as I bitch, my boyfriend really does try to step up and help out, but alas, he's a man. My dad on the other hand? So fucking lazy and useless around the house i can't stand it.
Ok this is for sure getting made into an apron 😍
November 20, 2025 at 1:56 AM
Ok this is for sure getting made into an apron 😍
Not every idea is a winner, sometimes the crafting gods just say no lmfao
November 19, 2025 at 12:31 AM
Not every idea is a winner, sometimes the crafting gods just say no lmfao
I did another little vend at a show; didn't make as much as the first one but a cool hundo isn't bad! I also sold the merch I made and we made $235 off 11 shirts and a bunch of stickers. Gonna be vending again on the 25th & 26th though so hopefully I make more on those rounds!
November 17, 2025 at 6:30 PM
I did another little vend at a show; didn't make as much as the first one but a cool hundo isn't bad! I also sold the merch I made and we made $235 off 11 shirts and a bunch of stickers. Gonna be vending again on the 25th & 26th though so hopefully I make more on those rounds!
We found these brioche cinnamon rolls at winco and winco frosting (which they sell now!?) And the two of them together are so incredible. I could eat the whole pack in one sitting. I might frow up after but it would be delicious at least once
November 17, 2025 at 5:04 AM
We found these brioche cinnamon rolls at winco and winco frosting (which they sell now!?) And the two of them together are so incredible. I could eat the whole pack in one sitting. I might frow up after but it would be delicious at least once
I mean look at this cute Lil face! How could you not let him get away with murder??
November 14, 2025 at 11:35 PM
I mean look at this cute Lil face! How could you not let him get away with murder??
My dog is kinda naughty and it's 100% my fault because my first instinct is to laugh.
I was working, minding my own business, and he comes over and starts in with the smackdown. Biting and pawing me, shaking me by the sleeve of my sweatshirt and I'm crying laughing. Turns out he had to pee
I was working, minding my own business, and he comes over and starts in with the smackdown. Biting and pawing me, shaking me by the sleeve of my sweatshirt and I'm crying laughing. Turns out he had to pee
November 14, 2025 at 10:51 PM
My dog is kinda naughty and it's 100% my fault because my first instinct is to laugh.
I was working, minding my own business, and he comes over and starts in with the smackdown. Biting and pawing me, shaking me by the sleeve of my sweatshirt and I'm crying laughing. Turns out he had to pee
I was working, minding my own business, and he comes over and starts in with the smackdown. Biting and pawing me, shaking me by the sleeve of my sweatshirt and I'm crying laughing. Turns out he had to pee
So, the oregon health plan will cover my acupuncture and has covered massage therapy before but the clinic named "Acupuncture and Massage" won't bill insurance for massage, just acupuncture. Once again, health care is dumb as shit.
November 14, 2025 at 7:56 PM
So, the oregon health plan will cover my acupuncture and has covered massage therapy before but the clinic named "Acupuncture and Massage" won't bill insurance for massage, just acupuncture. Once again, health care is dumb as shit.
I will never work harder for anyone other than myself. I worked 16 hours yesterday and I have 8 zipper pouches in various states of finishing. I vend tomorrow 😅
Didn't get an apron made but I should be able to finish these bags and make a couple rice heat packs!
Didn't get an apron made but I should be able to finish these bags and make a couple rice heat packs!
November 14, 2025 at 6:09 PM
I will never work harder for anyone other than myself. I worked 16 hours yesterday and I have 8 zipper pouches in various states of finishing. I vend tomorrow 😅
Didn't get an apron made but I should be able to finish these bags and make a couple rice heat packs!
Didn't get an apron made but I should be able to finish these bags and make a couple rice heat packs!
Why can't one singular man close a dryer all the way? What is this? Are you allergic to finishing things? It wouldn't bother me so much if there wasn't a bright ass light in there turned on all the time because of it
November 13, 2025 at 6:44 PM
Why can't one singular man close a dryer all the way? What is this? Are you allergic to finishing things? It wouldn't bother me so much if there wasn't a bright ass light in there turned on all the time because of it
Hey, so, if I have to get a quote for a product from a website and you ask for my email AND phone number and you call & leave a voicemail and then only use the email to tell me to call you- im not purchasing from you. Just...fyi
November 12, 2025 at 11:10 PM
Hey, so, if I have to get a quote for a product from a website and you ask for my email AND phone number and you call & leave a voicemail and then only use the email to tell me to call you- im not purchasing from you. Just...fyi
I just used the cricut to cut out a 1 cm seam allowance stencil so I can quickly draft in all the allowances on these boxy bags 🤭
November 12, 2025 at 9:15 PM
I just used the cricut to cut out a 1 cm seam allowance stencil so I can quickly draft in all the allowances on these boxy bags 🤭
I've been struggling with real bad acne for probably about a year and it just keeps getting worse. Out of pure desperation I slathered nizoral on my face. I've done it for 3 days now and almost all of my acne is gone.
You mean to tell me I had FUNGUS FACE!? OH MY GOD. Just kill me please
You mean to tell me I had FUNGUS FACE!? OH MY GOD. Just kill me please
November 11, 2025 at 8:58 PM
I've been struggling with real bad acne for probably about a year and it just keeps getting worse. Out of pure desperation I slathered nizoral on my face. I've done it for 3 days now and almost all of my acne is gone.
You mean to tell me I had FUNGUS FACE!? OH MY GOD. Just kill me please
You mean to tell me I had FUNGUS FACE!? OH MY GOD. Just kill me please
These muscle relaxers ain't shit. I took 2 on an empty stomach and nothing 😩
November 8, 2025 at 9:47 PM
These muscle relaxers ain't shit. I took 2 on an empty stomach and nothing 😩
Every time my bf leaves for work, he comes in for a kiss, and we're the same height and he comes in so slow and fucking bends down and makes me bend down to reach him and it irrationally pisses me off so bad. But today with my neck. He STILL DID IT and wouldn't close the gap. I got so mad. No kiss
November 8, 2025 at 8:31 PM
Every time my bf leaves for work, he comes in for a kiss, and we're the same height and he comes in so slow and fucking bends down and makes me bend down to reach him and it irrationally pisses me off so bad. But today with my neck. He STILL DID IT and wouldn't close the gap. I got so mad. No kiss